| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 307.1 | Queen of Practical jokes | GRANPA::LBINGNEAR | LOIS BINGNEAR @DWO | Mon Mar 13 1995 19:26 | 8 |
| What type of practical jokes are you looking for? Spouse, family,
co-workers or what? My sister is queen of the practical jokes and
believe me she has proven to be the best.
Let me know what you're looking for and I'll pass some on to you.
Lois
|
| 307.2 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 19:35 | 15 |
|
Put scotch tape over the contacts in the mouthpiece of
their phone.
Superglue their mouse to their desk.
Remove the mouse from the terminal and replace with a rubber rat.
Terrie
|
| 307.3 | ha ha! :^) | POOKY::OROURKE | M I C...K E Y | Mon Mar 13 1995 19:40 | 6 |
|
Personally I love hardboiling people's eggs and placing them back in
the carton in the fridge! :^)
/jen
|
| 307.4 | Good one Jen! :*) | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 19:42 | 13 |
|
I call my mother every year and tell her I'm pregnant.
Every year she believes me.
My mom and I are so much alike.....
:*)
Terrie
|
| 307.5 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 20:33 | 4 |
| 307.1 - for an exboyfriend who is moving away....And don't say a word
Ady F!!!!!
|
| 307.6 | JUST KIDDING!!!!! :*) | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 20:49 | 11 |
|
RE: .5 Well, that's a different story all together.
Send his photo to the airport/train/bus terminal, with
a note saying that he is a known terrorist.
Terrie
|
| 307.7 | | SUBPAC::SADIN | One if by LAN, two if by C | Mon Mar 13 1995 20:58 | 5 |
|
yow! :*)
|
| 307.8 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:00 | 11 |
|
I've got more ideas where that one came from. :*)
I need to know if it was an amicable seperation
or if they hate eachother first though. hehehehe
Terrie
|
| 307.9 | | RANGER::REITH | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:03 | 1 |
| And she's in the perfect mood to tell them 8^)
|
| 307.10 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:06 | 18 |
|
Dear Mr. So and so,
Your name recently appeared on a list of sexual partners of
a patient of ours. It is our duty to inform you that you
have been exposed to Herpes Complex II. You should make
an appointment with your family physician or a center for
sexually transmitted diseases at your earliest convenience.
Sincerely,
Dr. So and so
Such and Such Clinic.
:*)
|
| 307.11 | | RANGER::REITH | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:12 | 1 |
| And the cry goes out... "why you little so and so" 8^)
|
| 307.12 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:40 | 11 |
| No,no,no.....Those are spiteful...I don't hate him but I don't actually
care for him either....We just slag each other back in forth...It
actually has become a rather fun game....I have to admit that I like
the one about him being a terriorist especially since he is Irish and
a big IRA supporter however I think I could be arrested for making a false
statement like that to the police even though he is in the country
illegally. An no, I'm not calling imigration either.
Go an creative ideas?
|
| 307.13 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:41 | 6 |
| re 11?
What? Why you little so and so?
This is meant to be fun not nasty
|
| 307.14 | | RANGER::REITH | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:45 | 1 |
| There was a smiley there 8^)
|
| 307.15 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:48 | 11 |
|
Ok, put a bit of exlax in his coffee....on his way to a meeting.
:*)
Terrie
|
| 307.16 | | RANGER::REITH | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:50 | 2 |
| Yes, a "going" away present of a tin of Exlax-chip cookies. this is very
effective since I saw it done to a friend. 8^)
|
| 307.17 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:51 | 8 |
|
Yup, even if he comes back, he'll still be 'going'. :*)
Terrie
|
| 307.18 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:51 | 4 |
| Oooo, I like that one! Now I'll just have to think of a way of getting
them to him before he leaves.
|
| 307.19 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:52 | 4 |
|
Where is he going?
|
| 307.20 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 21:53 | 8 |
|
Oh, and FYI....they do make chocolate exlax. :*)
Terrie
|
| 307.21 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 22:02 | 3 |
| He is just MOVING AWAY, FAR, FAR AWAY
|
| 307.22 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 22:05 | 3 |
| Ok, Terry what is the silliest thing I can do without being arrested
for?
|
| 307.23 | | SUBPAC::SADIN | One if by LAN, two if by C | Mon Mar 13 1995 22:26 | 10 |
|
re: .22
you could dance nekkid in front of the mirror whilst squirting
yourself with ketchup.....!
oh...you meant do to HIM.....
chico
|
| 307.24 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 22:48 | 35 |
|
RE: .23 CHICO!!!!! :*)
RE: .22
Well, the cookies won't get you arrested unless you put enough
in there for him to overdose on. :*)
Hmmmmm...let me think. I need some background info...do you have
access to his home? His phone? His place of employment?
You could call someone he works with and tell them it's his birthday
and ask them to plan a big surprise birthday party for him. :*)
Does he have an internet account? you could post his internet address
and we could all send him piles of e-mail wishing him farewell. :*)
You could fill his mailbox with plastic spiders.
Is he involved in any outside activities? Have someone call and leave
a message that there is an important meeting of the team/group/etc. at
some place several miles from where he lives, and give some really wild
directions on how to get there, that end up getting him nowhere.
Give me some time, and some more info to work with, and I'm sure I can
come up with more.
Signed The Deviate. :*)
Terrie
|
| 307.25 | | MAL009::RAGUCCI | | Mon Mar 13 1995 22:53 | 5 |
| I like that one; you could make someone "pop" their curlers! by doing
that....
|
| 307.26 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 23:11 | 4 |
|
Which one? :*)
|
| 307.27 | | MKOTS3::SEIFERT | | Mon Mar 13 1995 23:31 | 3 |
| Terry you sound so wicked.
|
| 307.28 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 23:32 | 9 |
|
Thanks! That's one of the nicest things anyone has said to me today!
:*)
Terrie
|
| 307.29 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | Appease Belligerents. | Mon Mar 13 1995 23:50 | 13 |
|
Actually, let me clarrify something...I'm not wicked usually.
I've been sick for several days, and I think the fever is
finally eating away at my brain. I would never ever actually
DO any of this to anyone (Oh,right!)
:*)
hehehehe
Terrie
|
| 307.30 | | RANGER::REITH | | Tue Mar 14 1995 02:59 | 6 |
| At least not more than once... to the same person... on the same day
8^)
It's nice to see Terrie have a clear PURPOSE again 8^)
CoweringMan
|
| 307.31 | | SUBPAC::SADIN | One if by LAN, two if by C | Tue Mar 14 1995 11:08 | 6 |
|
Be afraid CM....be very afraid....
;*)
|
| 307.32 | | MEOC02::CASEY | MEO5/B6 DTN=739 3414 | Wed Mar 15 1995 16:41 | 6 |
| The one that I usually get caught with is a phone message saying `Phone
Mr Lyons'.. along with a phone number which always happens to be the
Melbourne Zoo!
Don
*8-)
|
| 307.33 | | CHEFS::WARRENJ | Celebrate good times.. | Wed Mar 15 1995 17:07 | 7 |
|
re -1
Yes, thats a common one here. Along with "Call Lizzie"...and the number
for Buckingham Palace.
Jackie
|
| 307.34 | | AYRPLN::VENTURA | In their eyes the magic resides. | Wed Mar 15 1995 17:42 | 4 |
| that's cute! We've also used "Mr. Baer" with the number for the local
zoo.
H
|
| 307.35 | | KIRKTN::CPATRICK | M|O|T|O|R|O|L|A|95 | Wed Mar 15 1995 23:53 | 3 |
|
phone someone and ask them if there is a "willie puller"
in the room or wherever
|
| 307.36 | %-} | PAKORA::KANDERSON | A wan Oot | Thu Mar 16 1995 01:59 | 1 |
| What does that meen...naughty.....!!!
|
| 307.37 | can i speak to Mr. Bedsprings...Rusty Bedsprings? | KAOFS::C_PLANT | It had to be you... | Thu Mar 16 1995 03:38 | 7 |
|
Have you folks been watching Bart in the Simpson's too much? :)))
Chris alias I.P Knightly
:)
|
| 307.38 | big | MASALA::TBARRETT | I wish the Lam had ABS | Thu Mar 16 1995 06:40 | 5 |
| 307.39 | They is COPYRIGHT!!!! | MEOC02::CASEY | MEO5/B6 DTN=739 3414 | Thu Mar 16 1995 10:52 | 16 |
| Re .38
Write it out 100 times, Tom Barrett..
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
`I must not pinch names from Don Casey.'
...etc...
Don
*8-)
|
| 307.40 | | SMURF::WALLACE | Life's a beach, then you dive! | Mon Mar 27 1995 22:15 | 10 |
| Perfect April Fools Day joke,
Everyone send the following message to the White House:
Bill,
Good Job!!! Keep up the great work!
A Concerned Citizen
|
| 307.41 | How izzat! | QCAV02::VMSRINIVAS | | Wed Mar 29 1995 06:48 | 128 |
| Boooooooooooooooooooooo!
<Press any key to continue>
<Press any key to continue>
a pppppp rrrrr iiiiiiiiii l
a a p p r r i l
a a p p r r i l
aaaaaaa ppppp rrrrr i l
a a p r r i l
a a p r rr iiiiiiiiiii lllllllll
ffffffff ooooo ooooo l !
f o o o o l !
f o o o o l !
ffffff o o o o l !
f o o o o l !
f o o o o l
f ooooo ooooo llllllllllll !
|
| 307.42 | I got caught properly! | MEOC02::CASEY | Don@MEO-MEO78B::CASEY-DTN7393414 | Sat Apr 01 1995 10:35 | 26 |
| I was quietly going about getting dressed in our bedroom here this
morning. Suddenly, from out in our lounge room I could hear a voice
yelling "DON!! DONN!!! Come quick!! HURRY!!"
I happened to be in my singlet and undepants at the time.
"What's wrong??" I said.
"There's a pelican perched on top of the Mitsubishi!!" said Christine.
"Really? Get the camera.. QUICK!!" I said.
Christine left the lounge room while I crouched down on all fours and
looked out to see if I could catch sight of the pelican on top of the
Mitsubishi.
Suddenly, from behind me, simultaneous with me realising that the
pelican must have taken flight, echoed the chorus of our family..
"YOU BIG APRIL FOOL!!"
I felt such a fool.
Don
*8-)
|
| 307.43 | | SUBPAC::SADIN | One if by LAN, two if by C | Sat Apr 01 1995 14:21 | 9 |
|
BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
that's classic. :)
chico
|
| 307.44 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | TimeToFillTheDonuts! | Sat Apr 01 1995 16:55 | 9 |
|
:*) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm so glad someone nailed you Don!! :*)
Terrie
|
| 307.45 | It was an excellent joke.. | MEOC02::CASEY | Don@MEO-MEO78B::CASEY-DTN7393414 | Sat Apr 01 1995 19:28 | 5 |
|
Sheepish grin...
Don
*8-)
|
| 307.46 | I can imagine it in all colours!!! | LJSRV1::LAMBRECHT | The Spirit of Bavaria | Sat Apr 01 1995 19:49 | 42 |
| What a great story!!!! I can see the "sequence" in all bright colours.
Hihihihihohohohohhahahahahehehehehuhuhuhu!!!!!!
Unfortunately nobody can "have" me today, I'm here at work.
But.... I remember.... some years ago.... my mom told me that she has
bought 3 bars of chocolat at the groceries and told me exactly where
she put them. And they happened to be my favourites. "But Martina,"
she said "please stay away from going to the cupboard before lunch.
I don't want you to binge chocolate before then." "Ok, Mom," I answered,
"no problem, I'm a big girl, I can control my cravings and wait."
She nodded and seemed to be satisfied. Then she went on with her
daily housework routine. But she kept an eye on me.
Because..... everybody knows it.... I *LOVE* chocolate!!!!!.....
I waited anxiously for her to leave the kitchen area. Finally! She
went outside the house into the garden, probably to fetch some
vegetables for lunch.
NOW!!!! It's either now or never!!!! So I silently carefully stepped
into the kitchen, turned around, good! nobody was there. I could
here my little brother laughing outside.
I perched towards the cupboard.... another hasty look over my
shoulders..... THEN!!!!
I opened the doors.......
NOTHING!!!!!! Damned!!!!! Where was the chocolate??????
I opened another cupboard, .....
Again, no chocolate.
Now I used some German swearwords and opened all doors, one after
another, but....
NO CHOCOLATE!!!!! "Himmelkreuzdonnerwetternochmal!!!!"
("Heavencrossthunderweatheragain!!!!")
Suddenly I turned around and..... saw my mom and my little brother
standing outside at the window and....
laughing at me.
April Fool!!!!! April Fool !!!!!
Well, now I knew better. ;)
Martina_feels_a_little_lonely_today_with_all_family_back_home...
;)
|
| 307.47 | :-))) | CHEFS::WARRENJ | something lost,something found | Mon Apr 03 1995 12:56 | 5 |
|
Great stories, you folks!
Jackiez
|
| 307.48 | | NETCAD::WOODFORD | TimeToFillTheDonuts! | Mon Apr 03 1995 14:27 | 12 |
|
Well, I got Holly GOOD Saturday after our fools luncheon.
We walked out to the parking lot, and I got very upset!
Someone had hit my car! Holly looked at me puzzled.
I said it again, even more upset, and walking towerds it.
As she started to follow, I turned around with a big smile,
and said "APRIL FOOLS!" :*)
Terrie
|
| 307.49 | | AYRPLN::VENTURA | In their eyes, the magic resides. | Tue Apr 04 1995 18:46 | 16 |
| RE: .48 .. PPPFFTTTHHH!!!
I got my friend Heidi GOOD on Saturday! I called her house from Ann
Many's place. I got her answering maching and left a very convincing
message basically saying "I'm Pregnant". She's been pumping me for
quite a while asking WHEN I'm going to get pregnant.
Well, she fell for it... hook, line, and sinker! She called my house
(I was at Ann's making chocolates all night) and left a congratulatory
message, all excited because she's going to be an "auntie". She told
me to call her up to 1:00 am. well, I got home right around that
time.. I called her and she sleepily answered.. All I said was "April
Fool!!!" She was quite upset with me and told me that her whole family
will be upset that "Holly isn't going to have a kitten". haha!!!
H
|
| 307.50 | | COSME3::HEDLEYC | Lager Lout | Tue Apr 04 1995 19:33 | 4 |
| I stayed in bed all day, so no April Fools on this front. Sorry to be so
boring!
Chris.
|