Conference turris::scandia

    The toll free number for the Wireless catalog is 1-800-328-5252.
    
    
    RE: flag mixups
    
    The paperback book of "The Last Place on Earth", the story of Scott
    and Amudsen's race to the South Pole, mistakenly substituted the
    Icelandic flag for the Norwegian in the cover graphics.
    
    
    

    
    Is there any truth to the rumor that, in the wake of Chernobyl,
    Sweden is converting all of its nuclear power plants to an alternative
    energy source?  I heard they were going to run them on coffee.
    
    
    

    Group soc.culture.nordic

    From: [email protected] (Mark Knutsen)                            
    Organization: NJ InterCampus Network, New Brunswick, N.J.

    Now seems a good time to mention John Louis Anderson's book,
    "Scandinavian Humor & Other Myths" (Harper & Row, 1986, $9.95)  From p.
    139, "Comic Relief for the Stoic Masses":

    "Scandinavian/American humor is based on hardship.  You can actually
    make Scandinavian/Americans laugh after a mishap has happened (happened
    to you, by the way, not to them) simply by saying "Uff Da!"

    "Why is this funny?  A horrible thing has happened, but we
    Scandinavian/Americans know that our lives are played out on the very
    edge of clinical depression, and any time we face a horrible situation
    and don't plunge into depression or go out and shoot ourselves in
    classical Nordic fashion, it's a time to let go and have a good laugh."

--
Mark (I went to Norway this summer) Knutsen | "Not of  | [email protected]
Student Systems Programmer                  |  this    |    [email protected]
NJIN Pilot Project, Rutgers University      |  world"  |  {...}!rutgers!knutsen

    Group soc.culture.nordic                             
    
    From: [email protected] (Hans Henrik Eriksen)
    Subject: Re: Uff da!                            
    
    In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Craig E. Ward)
    writes:
    
>    I received a gift catalogue called _Wireless_.  It looks like a
>    fund raiser for Minnesota Public Radio. Among the interesting gifts is 
>    a sweatshirt with their "exclusive 'Uff da!' logo."  Does "Uff da" mean 
>    anything in any of the Scandinavian languages?  
    
    "Uff da" HAS a meaning in Norwegian, at least.  It is equivalent to 
    "Oops!" or "Oh no!", its meaning is somewhat situation dependent.   
    
    Hans Henrik Eriksen ([email protected])
    University of Oslo                  
    
    =======================================================================
    
    From: [email protected] (Lyle Davis)       
    Subject: Re: Uff da!                          
    Organization: People-Net [pnet12], Del Mar, CA
    
    Uff da! is a saying originated by my grandmother, Bella Tollefson, in
    southern Minnesota.  No one else can take credit for it.  It is hers. 
    She created it.  Other Scandinavians may have borrowed it from time to
    time but it is hers.    
    
    Uff da! (according to Grandma Bella) is roughly analogous to "Ooops!!"
    and/or "Aw, shucks!!" (or, occasionally, something stronger, depending
    on the severity of the problem requiring a statement of "uff da!".) 
    
    Here in Amerika, we would hit our thumb with a hammer and say . . .
    "sunof a  brivelfrivitz!!! Dirty rotten hemmelkrammitz!!"  Someone of
    Scandinavian      descent (particularly of Norwegian descent, since
    they are known to be kind,  gentle, logically minded and soothing in
    and of nature) would simply say "Uff da!!".                     
    
    Someone who pours salt instead of sugar into a cup of coffee, when 
    discovering their error might say "uff da!".                       
    
    It was shortly after Grandma Bella created the phrase "uff da!" that
    she coined another new Norwegian based phrase that remains in common
    use even today in homes of Norwegian and/or other Scandinavian descent. 
    It is, "eat now, eat now!!"  The phrase is usually uttered, frequently,
    immediately prior to a meal.  I have noticed, particularly in Grandma
    Bella's home, that she would often continue this phrase throughout the
    meal.                        
    
    Grandma Bella has been gone for some time now.  It would not surprise
    me if she was, at this very moment, busily engaged in admonishing a
    fleet of angels to "eat now, eat now!!"  And if one of them were to
    drop a bit of lefsa on the golden, shiny floor, she would, no doubt,
    say "uff da!!"                      
    
    UUCP: uunet!serene!pnet12!lyled  
    ARPA: [email protected]
    INET: [email protected]       
    
    ======================================================================
    
    From: [email protected] (Peter Frenning) 
    Subject: Re: Uff da!                              
    Organization: Altos Computer Systems, San Jose, CA
    
    In Danish it's the expression you would utter when the puppy did
    something on the carpet, which should have been done outside in the
    roses.  I am unable to come up with a suitable english translation. 
    
         Peter Frenning, Altos Computer Systems, San Jose

    My wife's Uncle Bjarne often says "Ja da", which seems to mean
    something like "that's the way it goes", rather than "oops". 

    I'd say that "Ja, da" is more like "yeah, sure".
    
    The word "da" (literally "then" or "when"(past tense)) can also
    be used as a "modal adjective. Tacked on to the end of a phrase
    it changes the mood or sense of that phrase; very situation dependent.
    I cannot think of any English equivalent; I think that in English,
    the same modal contenet would be conveyed by tone of voice.
    
    Mauritz
    

    From: [email protected] (Kimmo Saarinen)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Finnish national inferiority complex 
    Date: 15 Feb 90 08:53:20 GMT
    Organization: Technical Research Centre of Finland

    ...
     
    There is a quite good joke about differences in the way of thinking of
    Americans (sorry :-), Frenchmen and Finns :
 
    An American, a Frenchman and a Finn were sitting on a fallen tree, when
    an elephant came in to sight. The American thought : "How an enormous
    T-stake we can get from it". The Frenchman thought : "I'm wondering 
    how they make love". And the Finn thought : "What it might think about
    me ?".
    
    ...
 
    Kimmo
 
    -- 
   Kimmo Saarinen                         ! e-mail  [email protected]
   Technical Research Centre of Finland   ! Tel.    +358 31 163 357
   Medical Engineering Laboratory         ! Fax             174 102 
   P.O.BOX 316, SF-33101 Tampere, Finland !   ... completely mad ...

    From: [email protected] (Lars-Henrik Eriksson)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: End of April
    Date: 29 Apr 90 06:54:23 GMT
    Organization: Swedish Institute of Computer Science, Stockholm (Kista), 
    Sweden
 
    In article <[email protected]>, rpeter@nmsu 
    (Peter Herman x5495) writes:
  >
  >< Shahin Kahn asked about "April Fools" jokes.
  >
  >I know for a fact that they are a tradition in at least some Swedish
  >families...
 
    April Fools day is a long-standing tradition in Sweden. Beside personal
    pranks you can be certain that newspapers, TV, radio etc. are going to
    have fake news and that there will be humorous advertisments.
 
    This year, I read in one paper that the government had decided on major
    gasoline tax reductions for owners of Swedish cars, in order to
    strengthen the national car industry. These news articles are normally
    written with a completely straight face and same people are always
    fooled by them.
 
    My favorite ad this year was for a videotape recorder that could be
    programmed with the names of people you didn't want to see. If one of
    those showed up, recording would instantly stop and resume when the
    person disappeared.
 
    My favorite ad *ever* was from a microprocessor manufacturer. The ad
    showed a chip with a single lead on it. The text said something like
    "announcing the worlds first single-bit micro processor with
    multiplexed power supply". 
    
    --  
    Lars-Henrik Eriksson				
    Internet: [email protected] Swedish Institute of Computer Science		
    Phone (intn'l): +46 8 752 15 09 Box 1263					
    Telefon (nat'l): 08 - 752 15 09 S-164 28  KISTA, SWEDEN

    From: [email protected] (Roger Haaheim)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Danes are posting
    Date: 7 Sep 90 14:38:42 GMT
    Organization: HP Design Tech Center - Santa Clara, CA
 
    True or false.  The three most famous Danes are:
 
    Hamlet   Victor Borge   Great

    From: [email protected] (Karl R. Tigerstedt)             
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Scandinavian jokes
    Date: 11 Sep 90 08:43:18 GMT
    Sender: [email protected] (Cnews - USENET news system)
    Organization: Helsinki University of Technology, FINLAND
 
     
     Here's a joke on Norwegians:
 
  
    What extra sign can be seen on Norwegian traffic roundabouts?
 

    - It's a sign saying : "Max. 8 laps".
 
    ----------------------
    Karl Tigerstedt                               email : [email protected]
    Helsinki University of Technology            packet : [email protected]
    Faculty of Electrical Engineering

    From: [email protected] (David L. Golber)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Travel in Northern Norway
    Date: 14 Sep 90 23:10:44 GMT
    Organization: The Aerospace Corporation, El Segundo, CA
 
 
    Standard joke: the mosquitoes in Finmark (N. Norway) are so big that
    they dry them and make milking stools out of them.
 

    From: [email protected] (David L. Golber)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic                        
    Date: 26 Sep 90 23:53:31 GMT
    Organization: The Aerospace Corporation, El Segundo, CA
 
    To learn to play hardingfele:

    Traditionally, one goes to a waterfall on Midsummer's eve, and throws
    in a leg of mutton.  The spirit of the waterfall (fossegrim) appears
    and draws your fingers up and down the strings until they bleed.
 
    This is why it is important to protect waterfalls.
 
    (If you only throw in the bone, the fossegrim only teaches you to tune
    the instrument.)
 
 
    (This summer in Rjukan, we were fortunate to be there when they were
    doing some repairs and had "turned on" the waterfall.)

    From: [email protected] (Gunnar Blix)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Some days in the life of a planet, represented by two of its
	countries
    Date: 26 Oct 90 16:56:26 GMT
    Organization: University of Illinois at Urbana
 
    >>~rJonny
    >>4th floor
    >>Norway
  
    >I've got friends out in the countryside with abbreviated addresses
    >(Like "Ola Normann, 3344 Myrdal, Norway")
    >but "4th floor" is just too much.
 
    Well, it might just almost get there... There are not that many places
    in Norway that have buildings that tall :-)
 
    One friend I have has address:	Heidi S�rli, 7570 Hell, Norway
 
    Another friend got a postcard out of Italy simply stating:	Joheim,
    Krager�.  No Norway, no nothing. Pretty impressive postal service if
    you ask me
 
    (The � is a slashed o as usual, and I think that must have been the
    clue that gave it away to the Italians)
 
 
    --
    ******************************************************************
    * Gunnar Blix      * Disclaimer: Never believe anything until it *
    * [email protected] * has been officially denied      - Clockburn *
    ******************************************************************

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    From: [email protected] (Oystein Torbjoernsen)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Postal services
    Date: 26 Oct 90 18:34:36 GMT
    Organization: Div. of CS & Telematics, Norwegian Institute of Technology
 
    What about the following address used on some junk mail I received from
    England a few years ago:
 
    O Torbjornsen
    Stud by
    Norway
 
    'Stud by' is an abbreviation of 'Student houses'. My correct address
    was (LaTeX'ified):
 
    �ystein Torbj�rnsen
    E-124
    N-7034 MOHOLT STUD BY
    NORWAY
 
    I was impressed! And just for a piece of junk mail.
 
    - OyTor

    From: [email protected] (Kjell Post)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic,talk.bizarre,misc.test
    Date: 10 Feb 91 13:28:33 GMT
    Sender: [email protected]
    Organization: University of California, Santa Cruz
  
   Heh.  Well, some American phone-operators appear rather ignorant.
   The following happened to me one morning last week.  Say no more.
	
 K = Kjell (pronounced "shell")
 T = Telephone
 
 K: "Zzzz...."
 T: <ring>
 K: "Zzzz.... Zzzz..."
 T: <ring, ring>
 K: "&(#2(*uq$@!*"
 T: <ring>
 K: "Yes, hello?"
 T: "Is this mister Kajelll Post?"
 K: "<sigh> speaking..."
 T: "This is from AT&T, we would like to convince you to switch to AT&T for..."
 K: "I charge $10 for any business call."
 T: "Oh... Hm... anyway, we would like to <bla-bla-bla...>"
 K: "OK, send me some papers and I'll look at your rates."
 T: "Where do you usually call, mr Post?"
 K: "Sweden."
 T: "And where are you calling from, mr Post?"
 K: "Santa Cruz, CA.  Where do you *think* you're calling?!"
 T: "Hm, where is Santa Cruz?"
 K: "Close to San Francisco and San Jose."
 T: "And Sweden, where's that city?  Or is that a state???"
 K: "Sweden is a country in northern Europe."
 T: "Oh!  So you're making INTERNATIONAL calls?"
 K: ""
 T: "Well, we'll have someone else call you another day about our rates."
 K: "Mmm, good bye." <klick>
 --
       For athletes and programmers,  ! Kjell E. Post
 a woman is the end of their career.  ! CIS/CE
                                      ! University of California, Santa Cruz
               -- A.Wickberg          ! Email: [email protected]

    From: [email protected]
    Newsgroups: clari.news.interest.animals,clari.news.europe,
	clari.news.interest.quirks
    Subject: Norwegian parrot refuses to talk
    Date: 12 Feb 91 18:08:21 GMT
 
 
	OSLO, Norway (UPI) -- Jokko, a West African Grey parrot, ruffled its
feathers, showed a fiery red tail but refused to talk for judges who are
trying to determine if he is a nuisance, Norwegian media reported
Tuesday.
	Norway's main daily newspaper, Aftenposten, said the court, trying a
three-day, 20-witness civil suit, decided on an on-site inspection of
the handsome bird to determine whether there was just cause in a
complaint its chatter caused intolerable suffering to a neighbor. But,
Aftenposten said, Jokko refused to testify.
	The proceedings were briefly moved cageside after the bird's owner
declined to take Jokko, a 32-year-old native parrot of West Africa, to
court for fear it could catch a serious cold if forced to travel in sub-
zero temperatures.
	Plaintiff Frank Andresen told the court his wife is in the hospital
after suffering a heart attack.
	"I claim that one of the reasons for her illness is the noise the
parrot makes and the provocations of my neighbors," he said. "The
screeching is like a knife in the stomach."
	But Jokko's owner, Erik Skog, appearing for the bird, told the court
no other neighbors had complained and he denied allegations he had
trained it to screech particularly loudly each time it discovered the
Andresens anywhere near.
	The report said negotiations between the two families on an out-of-
court settlement broke down when Andresen rejected an offer to keep
Jokko away from that part of the house bordering the Andresens, to
remove the bird for four weeks each summer and every weekend in the
summer months.
	Andresen demanded that the bird be allowed out of the house only for
short periods at certain times during the working week.
	West African grey parrots are renowned for their ability to copy
sounds and have a habit of holding jibberish conversations with
themselves using two or three different voices.

    From: [email protected] (Alex Langley)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: A little humor
    Date: 9 Dec 91 07:05:33 GMT
    Sender: [email protected]
    Organization: UCLA Mathematics Department
 
 
    Hejsan.  At least in the posts we get out here in Southern California, 
    it seems like s.c.n has groan a bit cold and snappy.  I just saw these
    two jokes in Nya svenska pressen, and though I have not secured
    explicit  permission to reproduce them here, I cite the Swedish Press
    (call 604 731 6381 in North America for subscription information) as
    the source, they are not my own work:
 
 
	1) En gumma satt i soffan med fyra fullt pa*kopplade 
	   elkaminer runt om sig.  "Visserligen a"r ha"r kallt,
	   men ta"nk vilken elra"kning vi kommer att fa*", menade
	   gubben na"r han kom in i rummet.  "Oroa dig inte", sa
	   gumman.  "De a"r inte va*ra elkaminer; jag har la*nat
	   dem av grannarna."
 
 
	2) Det var en svensk och en norrman pa* en bensinstation.
	   Na"r svensken kommer ut ur butiken, ser han na*gon a*ka
	   iva"g med hans bil.
 
	   - Stoppa tjuven, stoppa tjuven, han har tagit min bil!
 
	   Norrmannen ga*r fram till svensken och sa"ger med lugn ro"st:
	   - Var inte orolig, jag skrev upp registreringsnumret.
 
    Well, I hope no one's sore after the second one.  Feel free to
    substitute the nationalities for those of your own choosing as you find
    it appropriate.
 
    I personally think these jokes remain funniest in their original
    language, and they're definitely Swedish in their humor.  I'll leave it
    to somebody else to translate them, and substitute the a*,  a" and o"
    for the hakparanteserna which I can never keep straight anyway.
 
Alex
 
--
* Alex Langley,                                                         *
* <[email protected]>                                             *

    From: u-lchoqu%[email protected] (Lee Choquette)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Jokes about Finns and Swedes
    Date: 10 Jan 92 21:02:18 GMT
    Organization: University of Utah CS Dept
 
    In article <[email protected]> [email protected] (Gary
    Benson) writes:

 > Along the same lines, what is the generic phone number in Nordica? In the
 > US, they ALWAYS start 555 because the phone companies guarantee never to use
 > that prefix for real numbers. Check it out in American movies and TV series:
 > whether in print or in dialog, the 555 prefix is constant.
 
    And the digit after the 555 is greater than one.  The phone company
    uses 555-1xxx for its own numbers, such as directory assistance.  You
    can get assistance for another state by dialing the area code, followed
    by 555-1212.

    A friend of mine who is a Finnish emigre once tried to apply this
    principle to get directory assistance in Finland, dialing         
    011-358-555-1212.  Instead an old lady in Mikkeli answered, who was so
    glad to get a call from someone who spoke Finnish for a change.  She
    couldn't figure out why so many Americans called her.  I wonder why the
    Finnish phone company didn't change her number, at the very least.

 . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
  . . . . Lee Choquette . . . . . . . . . . Seen on a bumper sticker: . . . .
 . . [email protected]. . . . . . . . Life is uncertain --  . . . . .
  . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . eat dessert first.  . . . . .

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
    From: [email protected] (Esa Holmberg)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Jokes about Finns and Swedes
    Date: 10 Jan 92 23:44:17 GMT
    Organization: University of Turku, Finland
 
 
	First of all, there is nothing such as 'the Finnish phone
	company'. Instead, there are over 50 or so local phone
	companies in Finland.. Secondly, I'm not too sure anyone on
	the local phone company was aware of anything as normal as
	555-1212 to be used for any special purpose. Special numbers
	are shorter and usually begin with 0 here..
 
	I guess I should check our local 555121, just in case..
 
--
 ____________________________________________________________________________
(  Esa Holmberg   OH1LTM              Internet: [email protected], [email protected] (
 ) Packet: [email protected]   Elisa: Holmberg Esa TTL                )
+---  fax: +358 21 501 330  --------- Diana-fax: (9102 21) 501 330  --------+

Two Scandinavian jokes - with appologies to my colleagues up 
north...


 

I've heard they're building four new psychiatric hospitals in
Scandinavia. One in Copenhagen, one in Oslo, and one in
Helsinki. Stockholm will be fenced in... 
 



 
Why does the Swedish police patrol in groups of three? 
 
One of them can read, one of them can write, and one of them
likes to be seen with intellectuals... 
 

    Here's one from Usenet (from memory, I didn't save the posting):
    
    Older Danish geography books said everyone in Finland carries a knife.
    
    Because this simply isn't true, the newer editions have been
    corrected. Nowadays, in Finland, only foreigners carry a knife.
    
    In their back.
    

    From: [email protected] (Jarmo Ryyti)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Swedes in Finland
    Date: 17 Mar 92 07:38:24 GMT
    Organization: University of Jyvaskyla, Finland
    
    ...a Finnish joke ... to understand better [how Finns see] swedish
    minds ...
    
    Once a boat loaded with danes, norwegians, finns and swedes was sunk in
    the ocean. The passengers swan to the nearest island. What did they do
    there. The Danes set up a co-operative, the Finns started to fell
    forest, the Norwegians started to build a boat. What did the Swedes
    [do]. Yes. They were waiting to be introduced to the others on the
    island.

    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic     
    From: [email protected] (Pekka Juhani Taipale)
    Subject: Re: The lion hunt continues in Finland
    Sender: [email protected] (Usenet pseudouser id)
    Organization: Helsinki University of Technology
    Date: Thu, 2 Jul 1992 06:07:47 GMT
 
    [Refering to recent reports of an escaped lion roaming the Finnish
    countryside.] 

    The Lion Saga continues (we don't have other hot news items right now).
 
    General public seems to dislike the idea of killing the lion. Today's
    major newspaper (Helsingin Sanomat) has a few letters to the Editor
    that say that the lion shouldn't be killed. Even yeasterday's main
    editorial said the same. On the other hand, a well-known wild life
    expert says in the same paper that it would be best for the lion to
    kill it, because lion is a very social beast and it suffers terribly
    when it's alone in a cage.
 
    This drama has also shown how amazingly stupid TV reporters we have
    here. Some examples:
 
     TV reporter:      "What do you shoot the lion with?"
     Hunting expert:   "A rifle."
 
     TV reporter:      "How common is it really, that there are lions in 
                        Finnish forests?"
     Wildlife expert:  "It's very unusual."
 
    Don't these reporters THINK at all?
 
   -- 
   [email protected]             -- "Kill the Enemies of Peace!"

    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    From: [email protected]
    Organization: University of Western Ont, London
    Date: Thu, 15 Apr 1993 12:43:56 GMT
    Sender: [email protected] (USENET News System)
 
    Lars Foyen's piece in the Globe & Mail yesterday deals with the dispute
    between Denmark and Sweden set off by Thor Pedersen's joke that he
    wished he could send the army to stop the Swedes from reopening the
    nuclear reactor across the water from Copenhagen, to which Mr. Bildt
    responded with a serious protest. The Danes repeated the comment about
    the Swedish lack of a sense of humour, to which Sedish defence minister
    Bjorck responded by threatening to invade with surstromming, etc. 
    
    A Danish media debate ensued in which it was concluded, on national
    character, that the Swedes were formal, efficient and rather
    melancholy, seeing themselves as role models for the world; Norwegians
    were described as ever-cheerful, native adventurous, outdoorsy; and
    Danes were described as excessively fun-loving and, unlike Swedes, hate
    rules and regulations. 
    
    A pediatric specialist then said the differences can be summed up
    thusly: When a Danish child falls and gets hurt, he is given comfort
    and love. In Sweden, a committee is established to explore how such
    accidents can be prevented in the future (as in Ontario, run by
    socialists), and in Norway the child is told to get on his feet and
    stop crying. 
    
    (Preceeding mostly quotes) -- 

    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    From: [email protected] (Fredrik �stman)
    Sender: [email protected]
    Organization: Ellemtel Telecom Systems Labs, Stockholm, Sweden
    Date: Thu, 16 Sep 1993 08:32:50 GMT
                 
 
    A salesman from Stockholm arrives in Lule� airport. He's heard about
    the northerners' grumpyness, so he decides to have a go at the taxi
    driver.
 
 --Oh I love this scenery! It must be wonderful to live here!
 --Yes.
 --All the woods, and rivers and all. I suppose you go elk-hunting every autumn!
 --Yes.
 --I can see you've got a brand new Volvo!
 --Yes.
 
    At this point the salesman wonders if the taxi driver has any passions
    at all... maybe the family!
 
 --So, are you married?
 --Yes.
 --Aha... children?
 --Yes.
 --I've got children, too! It's the best thing in life! How many do you have?
 --Fourteen.
 
    Ahhh! Finally I've got him, the salesman thinks.
 
 --And what are their names? :-)
 --Different.
 
		*	*	*
 
 
         ______                     _~
        (_/_ _  _  _/) _  . /)     / ) , _/)     _
       __/ _/(_(/_(/__/(_/_/Z_    (_/_/)_/__/))_(I_/)_
 

    Seen on the International Swedish Interest discussion list,
     SWEDE-L <[email protected]>
    
    Candidate for the longest Swedish (compound) word:
    
    "Konstantinopolitanskbasfiolsfodralsmakaregesaellsaenkesonson"
    
    According to Ulf Westblom:
    
    "For those of you who are not fluent in Swedish it means the grandson
     of a widow to an apprentice making cases for base fiddles from
     Constantinople."

   From: [email protected] (Ruth M. Sylte)
   Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
   Subject: SHADES OF BLONDE:  How to Tell Nordics Apart
   Date: Tue, 10 May 1994 09:29:36
   Organization: University of California, Irvine
 
    In a feeble attempt to lighten up the day, I offer the following from
    USA author John Louis Anderson's _Scandinavian Humor and Other Myths_. 
    The visuals, unfortunately, can't be included and I apologize to
    Nordics for the continuing incorrect references to all Norden as
    "Scandinavia".....
 
 
    SHADES OF BLONDE: How to Tell Scandinavians Apart
 
    The notion that Scandinavians are indistinguishable from one another is
    a  malicious myth that is easily disproved.  Anyone who announces at
    Syttende Mai  that he is Swedish will quickly discover how
    non-interchangeable Scandinavians  truly are.
 
    We feel that if the Irish, for example, can distinguish with such
    clarity and ferocity between the north and south of a single country,
    people can certainly be expected to notice the differences between
    five separate nations.
 
    One can easily learn to tell one Scandinavian from another.  
    Scandinavian/Americans make these distinctions all the time, usually
    with substantial vigor, and occasionally with humor.
 
    To illustrate these vast national differences, I photographed five men
    from  the five Scandinavian countries.  Each model is named and his
    home address is given. Such convincing photographic proof will
    certainly put an end to the notion of the interchangeable Nordic.
 
    NORWEGIAN

     Knut Staale Bjoernhaug
     Smedsrudsveien 28F
     Tromsoe, Norge
 
    Norwegians love the out-of-doors and can easily be distinguished by
    their ruddy complexions, gained from endless hours of skiing.  The
    mountain terrain of Norway makes Norwegians cautious to a fault, and
    they avoid any precipitate action that might cause them to lose their
    balance and fall off the side of the fjord.

    Norwegians are quite proud of their explorers and sailors.  Norwegian 
    expeditions have explored both the North and South poles (neither one
    is much colder than, say, Mosjoeen in the winter), and their sailors
    have been sailing away from Norway since Viking days.  Considering the
    hardships endured by the Vikings -- terrible food, frequent ship
    sinkings, hostile natives in the host countries -- they must have
    wanted to sail away from Norway *very* badly.

    It is perhaps a quibbling debate, best left to scholars, but there
    don't seem to be many sagas about sailing *back* to Norway.
 
    (Visual: Mr. Bjornhaug is dressed in a white shirt, dress pants, tie,
    and clogs.  He is wearing a Norwegian sweater, holding skis and a
    Norwegian flag.)
 
 
    DENMARK

     Jens Ebbesen
     7 St. Kannikestraede
     Aalborg, Danemark
 
    The Danes are the most European of the Scandinavians, and certainly the 
    most gregarious.  Visiting has always been easier in Denmark than the
    rest of Scandinavia because Denmark is about as flat as you can get
    without being bulldozed and paved.  This may also explain why they end
    their names in "-sen" instead of "-son", but I don't know why it would.

    Danes are great cooks and hosts.  Danish pastries, Danish open-faced 
    sandwiches and Danish aquavit are justly famous.  Danish parties are 
    legendary, lasting so late into night that there is barely time to go
    home and change clothes before the party resumes with a big breakfast.

    The Danish language looks perfectly normal when written, and can often
    be understood in that form.  But when it is spoken, it sounds like,
    well, a speech impediment.  Nevertheless, Danes all seem to understand
    each other, and remain cheerful. Perhaps they too, are chuckling about
    how their language sounds.
 
    (Visual: Mr. Ebbesen is dressed in a white shirt, dress pants, tie and 
    clogs.  He is carrying a tray filled with open-faced sandwiches,
    aquavit  and a Danish flag.)
 
 
    FINLAND

     Toivala Maatemelaki
     168 Pohjoisesplanadi
     Helsinki, Suomi
 
    Finns are the most easily distinguished of all Scandinavians, coming as 
    they do from an entirely separate stock and language group.  Finns are
    known for their high cheekbones and broad faces, and speak an entirely
    unrelated language, except for those Finns who speak a form of Swedish
    called Finnska.

    Finns are great designers.  They have survived as a nation for
    centuries by designing ways to keep from getting invaded by either
    Russia or Sweden.   After that, designing a little glassware, furniture
    or fabric is a snap.

    With typical Scandinavian modesty (or feelings of inferiority), when
    the Finns started marketing their dinnerware outside of Scandinavia,
    they named it after other countries -- such as Arabia, or Ittala -- in
    hopes that exotic locations would impart a mystique to their efforts. 
    The ploy worked so well that today people all over the world own
    beautifully designed crystal which they think came from an OPEC
    country.
 
    (Visual:  Mr. Maatemelaki is dressed in a white shirt, dress pants, tie
    and clogs.  He carries a modernistic oil painting, glassware filled
    with aquavit on a plate and a Finnish flag.)
 
 
    SWEDEN

     Borje Larsson
     57 Stora Soedergatan
     Ystad, Sverige
 
    Swedes are all engineers and sociologists who enjoy pretending they are 
    peasants, even though peasants were outlawed at the turn of the
    century.  The communally minded Swedes were intensely embasrrassed at
    the though that some of them were poor, so they changed the government,
    the laws and the rules.  That made all the Swedes financially secure,
    so they brought in "guest workers" from Eastern Europe to do all the
    nasty work.  Don't knock it.  It seems to work.

    Swedish homes are full of Dala horses and painted wall plaques.  These 
    plaques are very attractive, but those decorative phrases on them
    actually say things like "You have to pay for the second cup of
    coffee," or "We're going to export socialism to American and make them
    all ashamed of Vietnam."

    Surprisingly, these same plaques sell very well in Scandinavian (gift) 
    shops in America, especially to people who do not speak Swedish.

    You have to be very careful around anyone who looks like this,
    particularly with a calculator built into a painted coffee pot.
 
    (Visual:  Mr. Larsson is dressed in a white shirt, dress pants, tie and
    clogs.  He is also wearing a striped tunic and carrying a painted Dala
    horse and a  Swedish flag.)
 
 
    ICELAND

     Thorbjoerner Sigurjonsson
     32 Hafnarstraeti
     Reykjavik, Island
 
    Icelanders can be distinguished by sound alone because Icelanders are
    the only Scandinavians who still speak Old Norse, the language of the
    Vikings.  It is a fact they never let you forget.

    They are an intensely literary people who can (and do) recite page
    after  page of their own poetry, or the poetry of one of Iceland's many
    skaldic or eddaic poets. They are not impressed with Americans whose
    idea of literature is "People" Magazine.

    Geographical locations in Iceland are often referred to by their
    literary connections rather than the strict geopolitical notation on
    the map. "The  Gautrek's Saga area" or "the place where Hrafnekel
    killed So-and-So" are real locations, and can be used as directions. 
    Not by American tourists, of course, but then that's half the fun.

    Iceland is the only place where tourists need both a map and a copy of 
    Cliff Notes for a successful trip.
 
    (Visual:  Mr. Sigurjonsson is wearing a white shirt, dress pants, tie
    and  clogs. He is wearing a heavy Icelandic sweater and carrying tons
    of books, a viking sword and an Icelandic flag.)
 
    --------
 
    Of course, the final joke (which translates ever-so-poorly to the
    written  word) is that it's the same guy in every picture.... :)

 ------------------------------------------------------------------------
 Ruth M. Sylte         [email protected] |
  International Opportunities Program  | "If you think education is
   Center for International Education  |    expensive, try ignorance."
    University of California, Irvine   |               - William Bennett
      Irvine, CA  92717-2476   USA     |
 ------------------------------------------------------------------------

   Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
   From: [email protected] (H. Peter Anvin)
   Subject: Re: Nordic sense of humour 
   Sender: [email protected]
   Organization: Northwestern University Electromagnetics Laboratory
   Date: Sun, 22 May 1994 21:04:09 GMT
 
    Judging from Swedish TV and film there seems to be no lack of humour in
    Sweden.
                            
    Swedish comedy often seems to be political in nature (and God knows the
    Swedish goverment often is a joke) or jokes on Swedish stereotypes. 
    Because of that it may be hard to comprehend to non-Swedes. Before I
    emigrated in 1988 there was a TV show called "Helt Approp�" with
    exactly this type of humour.  (An internationalized version called "The
    Prize" about the Nobel Prize won some award at some point).  One of
    their reoccurring themes were "Sverige �r fantastiskt... eller hur?"
    ("Sweden is terrific... isn't it?"), a ploy on Turistr�dets advertising
    campaign ("Sverige �r fantastiskt").  The faces the participants made
    spoke a language of it's own.
 
    Despite the fact that Swedish movies don't exactly have Hollywood
    budgets, there are quite a few very good Swedish movies, quite a few of
    which are comedies.  One of my personal favourites of all time is
    "LEIF", by Galenskaparna & After Shave.  It deals about a small arms
    manufacturer, Rotums Kanoner & Krut, which had been somewhat...
    unscrupulous about whom they sell to.  Of course, it REALLY didn't hurt
    the amusement effect that while the movie was already shooting, all of
    a sudden there was a major scandal about Bofors selling arms
    illegally...
 
    [Incidentally, it should be pointed out that the Swedish gov't is by no
    means the ONLY one which is a joke...]
 
	/hpa
 
  -- 
  INTERNET: [email protected]               FINGER/TALK: [email protected]
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  FIDONET:  1:115/511 or 1:115/512    STORMNET:    181:294/101

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
   From: [email protected] (Ahrvid Engholm)
   Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
   Subject: Re: Nordic sense of humour (was Re: Net.culture & flames)
   Date: 23 May 1994 04:28:01 GMT
   Organization: Stacken Computer Club, Stockholm, Sweden
 
    Another favourite TV show of mine could be mentioned: "Nattsudd" by
    Bjorn Wallde and Svante Grundberg. (The name of the show means approx.
    "Staying Up Late in the Night". An internationalized version of this
    show was made, called "Goodnight Sweden".) It is all about two guys who
    do a low-budget TV show in an apartment of one of them. All they have
    is plenty of booze, a guitar that is out of tune and lots of film clips
    from old jazz films. They drink, show the clips and talk about life in
    a rather confused way, while they pretend to be great entertainers and
    have  personal experiences from the jazz world since the 1930's.

    Maybe it doesn't sound too funny, but it was.
 
    And of course, we also had Hasse & Tage, who did a lot of films. Tage
    Danielsson died a few years ago, and Hasse Alfredson became boss of the
    open air Skansen museum and zoo in Stockholm. But once they were the
    center of entertainment life here. Everything they touched became gold
    (stage shows, music, books, TV shows, films etc).

    Just let me give one example: Lindeman. This was a ploy they had on
    their stage shows. Tage would be the interviewer and Hasse would be
    (Someone) Lindeman who was an expert of some subject that could be
    found in todays paper. And from this they improvised a dialogue, that
    was totally different each evening and often surprisingly funny
    (considered that it was totally improvised).
 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
   From: [email protected] (Christian Bartholdsson )
   Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
   Subject: Re: Nordic sense of humour (was Re: Net.culture & flames)
   Date: 23 May 1994 07:52:17 GMT
   Organization: Uppsala University
 
    Our most famous comedian Jonas Gardell very rarely talks politics.  And
    the biggest comedy success of the past year, "I Manegen med Glenn
    Killing", doesn't deal with politics for one second.
 
    - [email protected]

    From: [email protected] (OddMagne Sekkingstad)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Health Care (ughhh)
    Date: 19 Aug 1994 06:48:01 GMT
    Organization: Institute of Informatics, University of Bergen, Norway
 
    A Norwegian friend of mine told me that a Swedish chainsaw manufacturer
    began marketing thier product in the US, with an English language
    manual noticeably larger than the Swedish or Norwegian versions.  News
    commentators explained with great humor in a report that this was
    because of all the additional warnings, including (they pointed out
    specifically) "Do not attempt to stop the chainsaw with your hand."

    This was made even more humorous a couple of years later, when they
    were saved a pile of money in a lawsuit brought by a U.S. citizen who
    was injured stopping the chainsaw with his hand.  He was unable to
    collect, since the manual specifically warned against it.

    Rune surmised that the warnings were legally unnecessary in the
    Scandinavian manuals, since no Scandinavian would publicly admit to
    doing anything that stupid.

    I've always thought the problem could be solved if all products had a
    label on them stating:
 
    Warning:  This product not intended for use by stupid people.
 
    Let this guy try to prove in court that, although he propped the ladder
    up on a manure heap, he is *not* stupid and didn't violate the
    instructions.
 
    -- 
 
    Odd-Magne

 
 
    The Wall Street Journal, October 6th 1994, front page
 
    * * *
 
    Some People See Politicians As Jokers: This Guy Is One -- Jacob  
    Haugaard Was Elected To the Danish Parliament Promising Better  
    Weather
 
    * * *
 
    By Dana Milbank, Staff Reporter of The Wall Street Journal.
 
    AARHUS, Denmark -- Jacob Haugaard swears it was just a practical  
    joke.
 
    He was only kidding when he launched the Party of Deliberate Work-Shy  
    Elements. He was merely lambooning politicians when he ran for  
    Parliament promising better weather, tail winds for Danish cyclists ,  
    and the right to be impotent. He was only having fun, he says, when  
    he spend campaign funds on beer and sausages for his voters. 
  
    Then, a funny thing happened. After six election defeats, the  
    42-year-old standup commedian actually was elected two weeks ago to  
    the Danish parliament. Tuesday, Mr. Haugaard took his place in the  
    nations first independent legislator in half a century.
 
    Nobody finds this more amusing than Mr. Haugaard himself. In his  
    first act as an MP, a visit to the queen, he wore a loud tie and a  
    three-piece suit made from a burlap coffee sack. ``I dont know  
    anything about politics,'' he say. ``Now, I get an education in how  
    it works--with full salary.'' The job pays about $60.000 a year.
 
    Mr. Haugaard, understandably, has become a celebrity. Weathermen talk  
    about the Haugaard factor in their forecasts. College students invoke  
    his name at protests. Haugaard T-shirts are available if not  
    fashionable, and the comic appears regularly on television and on the  
    front pages. ``He's more popular than the prime minister,'' says  
    Michael Meyerheim, the host of a Danish TV talk show.
 
    Political Oddities
    ------------------
 
    Exotic characters are in politics all over the world. Italy had La  
    Cicciolina, a former porn star, in its Parliament. And radio talker  
    Howard Star won (and then relinguished) the Liberian Party's  
    nomination for the governorship of New York this year.
 
    But Mr. Haugaard could well be the first professional comic to win  
    election to a national legistature as a joke.
 
    Some sober Danes don't think it's a laughing matter. ``How is it  
    imaginable that 20,000 people would vote for a clown like that?''  
    Conservative Party chief Torben Rechendorff demanded in the Aarhus  
    Stiftstidende, Mr. Haugaard's hometown paper. Steen Gade, socialist  
    MP, also thinks the election shows that Denmark is in a rotten state.  
    ``It is sad that many voters have thought the work in the Parliament  
    so unimportant as to use their vote on him,'' he told the paper.
 
    Lighten up, Mr. Haugaards backers reply. ``The politicians have been  
    in Parliament for many, many years and talked and talked and talked  
    and done nothing,'' says Jens Richard Pedersen, a graying Aarhus  
    buissnessman. Dansh voters are upset with incumbent politicians who  
    have failed to fix the countried double-digit unemployment and do  
    something about high taxes.
 
    At the Cafe Jorden here in Aarhus, young Haugaard supporters recite  
    favourite Haugaard promises: more Nutella chocolate-spread for the  
    U.N. soldiers in Bosnia. Less sex in the teachers' room. Arming a  
    17th-century frigate for service in the Persian Gulf.
 
    ``I voted for him just to get a kick out of it,'' says Peter Borring,  
    a 25-year-old electronics salesman in Aarhus. ``Danish politics is  
    very boring.''
 
    The same clearly cannot be said about Mr. Haugaard. His suburban home  
    has a dentist's chair and a huge water tower in the backyeard.  
    Several mornings after his election victory, he comes downstairs in  
    his underwear to greet a visitor. His rumbled coffee-sac suit (he  
    calles it the ``Yves Sack Laurent'') hangs on a chair. he instructs  
    his young daughter to ``light up the lady,'' a nightclub sculpture of  
    a woman with neon breasts.
 
    Mr. Haugaard's political philosophy is a simple spoof of politicians'  
    promises and evasions. ``If something good happens, I say it's me,''  
    he says. ``If it's bad, I blame it on the opposition.'' His promises  
    include more Renaissance furniture at Ikea (the Swedish warehouse  
    furniture stores), bigger Christmas presents, shorter supermarket  
    lines, carpeted sidewalks and a law giving disability payments to  
    humorless people.
 
    His policy on employments: ``If work is so healthy, give it to the  
    sick.'' He also wowed a fight for the right to be ``ugly, lazy, rich  
    and stupid.''
 
    On the Cheap
    ------------
 
    One of his election posters features him with a cigar and a  
    Rolls-Roycs and the slogan: ``An Honest Man.'' In his campaign (for  
    which he spend all of $1,500) he was shown with his hand on a train's  
    emergency brake, saying ``It's now or never.''
 
    The son of a carpenter, Mr. Haugaard did factory and janitorial work  
    before forming a bad called Sofamania in the 1970s. He plays a guitar  
    mad from a garden spade. Since his hippie days, Mr. Haugaard says, he  
    has given up all drugs -- even aspirin -- and is now a member of  
    Alchoholics Anonymous.
 
    The band, the comedy routines, appearances in two movies and a  
    soft-drink commercial in his case added up to political liability. In  
    1979, he accepted the nomination of some Aarhus University students  
    to be their candidate for Parliament. He lost, then ran five more  
    loosing campaigns before pulling off his stunning victory this year.
 
    Nobody -- not even Mr. Haugaard -- ever took his candidacy seriously.  
    Though Denmark's Parliament is elected nationally, an independent can  
    appear on the ballot in his or her home district by gathering 150  
    signatures, and all it takes to win a seat is 18,000-odd votes. On  
    Sept. 21, he got 23,253 votes and became one of the 179 members of  
    the exalted body.
 
    Another `Aarhus Joke'
    --------------------
 
    To Ane Dybdahl, the newspaper reporter who followed Mr. Haugaard for  
    the Aarhus Stiftstidende, his victory is just another ``Aarhus  
    Joke.'' People in Copenhagen make fun of their cousins in Aarhus and  
    the rest of Denmark's Jutland-peninsula as slow-witted. One joke says  
    Aarhus people take the door off when they go to the bathroom so  
    nobody can peek through the keyhole. ``It's a special kind of Danish  
    humor,'' she says of Mr. Haugaard's style, ``a bit childish.''
 
    What made her think that? Mr. Haugaard told her his goals in  
    Parliament would be to erect a giant statue of himself urinating on a  
    windmill, and to get his ``virtual-reality'' hat past the  
    parliamentary guards.
 
    Pundits say that in Denmark's fragile coalition government, Mr.  
    Haugaard's vote could be a tiebreaker. But not to worry. The comedian  
    plans to use his position to jawbone his fellow politicians on causes  
    he actually cares about: alcoholism, diability, the problems of old  
    age. Mr. Haugaard, who won't sit on any comittees or propose any  
    laws, intends, uncharacteristically, to be a quiet and respectful  
    watchdog. ``In the beginning, I think I'll just take the cotton out  
    of my ears and put it in my mouth,'' he says.
 
    He admits some of his political promises, such as affecting the  
    weather and assuring opportune tail winds, may be hard to keep. But  
    he appears to have connections in high places. ``All Denmark was  
    laughing the day after the election,'' Mr. Haugaard says. ``The  
    weather was beautiful, the sun was shining, and a tail wind was coming  
    from all directions.''  

    From: Ernest Wessman <[email protected]>
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Date: Mon, 15 May 1995 20:52:12 +0200
    Organization: Graz University of Technology, Austria
 
    Here's a joke that I read in an inflight magazine (Alitalia I believe). 
 
    A hunter from Copenhagen owned a very special dog, special because it
    could run on water. He was mighty proud of his dog, and so he took it
    hunting on the Danish peninsula of Jutland (Jylland) where the
    inhabitants are known to be hard to impress.

    Having sent his dog running after birds across the water a couple of
    times, but without receiving any attention from the hunting Jutlanders,
    he just couldn't keep it to himself any longer and said: - Quite some
    dog I have, don't you think?  A Jutlander turned to him and answered:
    -Yes, I noticed he doesn't swim. 
 
    Greetings from Austria,
 
	Ernest

    A recent study of sperm counts showed that the seminal fluid of Finnish
    males have the highest average [the healthful benefits of sauna are
    suspected]. So why is the birth rate not much higher in Finland than in
    countries like India and China?
    
    Here are the top eight reasons:
    
    8. None of the sperm will ask for directions.
    7. Most are more interested in the football (soccer) match
    6. Most need about three more beers to work up their courage.
    5. They're not looking for a HUMAN egg; they're trying to get to the
       caviar sandwiches before they're all gone.
    4. "I'd ask, but I can't dance."
    3. Group dates are in.
    2. None of them have been properly introduced.
    1. So few of them are ethnically Finnish.

	IMHO reason #6 is most weighty...

		Asko

    From: [email protected] (Spidra Webster)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Date: Tue, 15 Aug 1995 17:00:10 -0700
    Organization: Sirius Connections
 
    Danes have jokes about Swedes and Norwegians, the Swedes make fun of
    Norwegians and Danes (mebbe Finns), and the Norwegians make fun of the
    Danes and Swedes.
 
    Here's a joke I half-remember being told by a Dane.  There was a guy
    from Copenhagen who visited Aarhus and decided he really loved it. He
    wanted to move there but he wanted to have the Aarhus accent.  He heard
    from a friend that medical science had come up with just the thing. It
    was a simple surgery - they just had to remove 1/4 of your brain and
    you would speak with a perfect Aarhus accent. Although that sounded a
    little drastic to the Copenhagen guy, he figured it was worth it in
    order to fit in seamlessly with the folks in Aarhus.  The day of the
    operation one of the doctors slipped and 1/2 his brain was cut out.  Oh
    no!  The doctors had no idea what effect this would have!  They
    hurriedly woke the patient up and he said <Norwegian slang for
    "hello">.
 
    I want to emphasize that I bear no ill will towards any Scandinavians
    or Finns.  I was astounded and somewhat amused that they made so much
    fun of each other!

    Posted to conference: Jokes and Stories
    Message 1       9/16/95   8:05 AM
    Subject: The Tennis Shoe Waltz (Scandinavian Parody)
    From:  Ian Pengelly
    To:  Jokes and Stories
    
    The Tennis Shoe Waltz (Scandinavian Parody)
    
    Ay vas dansin' vid Lena Svenson to da Tennis Shoe Valtz
    Ven an old Svede I happened to see
    Introduced him to my Lena, and vhile dey vas dansin'
    Dat Svede stole my Lena from me
                                      
    Oh, I remember da night, and da Tennis Shoe Valtz
    You can't guess da pain it has cost
    I have lost my liddle Lena da night dey vas playin'
    Dat beautiful Tennis Shoe Valtz
    
    Now remember, all you Norskies... if you have a Sveetheart
    You listen to vhat I vill tell
    Don't introduce her to a guy who's Svedish extraction
    Or you'll be as sorry as h--l
    
    Yust take her to a place vhere you von't see a Svede
    Feed her ice cream and cookies and malts
    You vill enjoy your romancin' vhile you keep on dancin'
    To da beautiful Tennis Show Valtz
    
    Oh, my darling is so clever
    I'll remember forever
    When she vore a newspaper dress to a ball
    Then her dress caught on fire
    And burned her entire
    Front page, Sport section and all...
    
     From Red Stangland's _More Uff Da Jokes, Vol.2_. Reprinted without
    permission.
                 

    From: [email protected] (I. Wax Poetic)
    Newsgroups: soc.culture.nordic
    Subject: Re: Please send info on holger dansk
    Date: Tue, 17 Oct 1995 19:48:41 GMT
    Organization: WSIPC
 
 
>In article <[email protected]> [email protected] "Henrik Ernoe" writes:
 
>> 
>> Holger Danske himself is a mythical figure who sleeps eternally under the
>> castle in Elsinore, (another version of the tale has him sleeping in the
>> hill Nonnebakken in Odense) he is supposed to wake up and take arms
>> if Denmark is in mortal danger.
>> 
 
    Can't help you with the man, but I did take a cruise across the
    Skaggerak one summer on the Holger Danske.  It was so old and rickety
    that the Norwegians have nicknamed it the "Holger Kanskje!"
        

    From: [email protected] (Gary Berkson)
    
    OSLO, Norway (AP) -- A Norwegian company that advertised a boring job
    for lazy people got more applications than it could handle. Originally,
    the FH company -- an importer and distributor -- asked for a
    hard-working and friendly salesman, but in vain. So they ran the
    following: ``Tiresome and boring wholesale company seeks indolent
    people with a total lack of service mindedness for a job that is
    completely without challenge. If you're still interested, sit down.
    Have a cup of coffee. Relax. If you can be bothered, call.'' The
    company got 130 calls.