Conference turris::cooks

    
    In my family, we always have TURKEY with Roast Potatoes, roast
    parsnips, brussel sprouts with chestnuts, carrots in parlsey sauce,
    bacon wrapped round sausages, and of course 2 types of stuffing.  The
    first one is a chestnut stuffing which is made of sausage meat and
    pureed chestnuts.  The second is made of breadcrumbs, suet, sage,
    chopped onion and sausagemeat and is my personal favourite.  And then
    of course there is the turkey gravy over everything!
    
    For pudding we have mince pies, christmas pudding and fruit salad.
    
    For tea we always have turkey sandwhiches and sausage rolls and salad
    and then christmas cake.
    
    Hope this is the info you are after.
    
    Marie

    Ahhhhh, the great English Christmas feast, designed to test the
    gastronomic resolve of any heroic figure and the breaking strain of
    all blood and family ties.
    
    We start with the Turkey. Not a native of these shores, but with a
    clever bit of marketing the factory raised, maximum breast poundage,
    cardboard tasting bird frozen bird is seen as the denizen of the
    English christmas feast. In selecting your bird, you must not choose
    one of sensible size to be easily consumed by the assembled guests.
    Instead, one must throw all caution to the wind and select a bird of
    such Leviathan stature that it can easily feed the army of the Rhine and
    still have enough left over for easter.
    
    Preparing the fowl at least a day before Christmas, one ponders the
    stuffing. Only at Christmas time are the shelves of supermarkets
    decked with such delicacies as Cranberry sauce, Chestnut (whole and
    pureed), pickled walnuts, Capers, weird and wonderful chutnies, and the
    beloved PAXO 'stuffing', plus things you've never seen before in you
    life and can't recognise; all in catering sized packages and all stuff you 
    wouldn't normally touch with a barge pole were it not for Christmas.
    With such a wonderous selection to choose from, the inevitable PAXO is
    used. Not that the poor turkey needs stuffing, and indeed stuffing
    lengthens cooking time considerably to the detriment of taste and
    texture, but tradition being what it is a mountain of stuffing is
    rammed into every pore of the creature. The enthusiastic cook will shoe
    horn the burgeoning fowl into the oven the night before the feast, and
    select an oven temperature which whilst timing the roasting of the 
    bird to perfection for the next day also ensure maximum culture of
    salmonela and drying of flesh. The dedicated cook crawls out of bed at
    3 am, prepares the bird and sets it going.
    
    The great day arrives. In the early hours of the morning a harrased
    cook sets out all manner of finger food and delicacies to tempt the
    palette of the guest. Crips (chips), small sausages wrapped in bacon,
    cheese bites, perhaps Stilton (and only at Christmas are you persuaded
    to purchase rounds of Stilton a foot in diameter and six inches high
    along with the obligatory bottle of over priced, non-vintage port),
    crackers and biscuits of every sort and some you never thought existed,
    the odd bit of fruit, lager, beer, spirits, peanuts, other salted nuts,
    bushels of hazel nuts, brazil nuts, walnuts (and nobody can find the
    nut cracker so the door jamb is used so ruining you expensive and
    immaculate paint work) etc.
    
    Then you set to 'THE MEAL'. First scrape and peel the odd hundred
    weight of potatoes. Chuck in and prepare a similar poundage of Parsnips, 
    carrots, Brussel sprouts and cabbage. In the background you can hear 
    guests arriving, getting settled and stuffing themselves on your finger 
    food. In the meantime you struggle to get the small catering edition of 
    vegetables in front of you into three small pots and what little space 
    that's left in the oven; but not to worry, the turkey is so dessicated 
    from its long haul cook that its shrunk to half its original size; good 
    thing you bought a big one.
    
    In a last four hour dash you, get the beach ball sized Christmas pud
    (of cannon ball consistency) steaming, and hope the guest will also
    consume the christmas cake, the trifle, the ice cream and selection of
    crackers and cheese. You desparately prepare the brandy sauce, the
    bread sauce, the butter sauce, and prepare a gravy from the leavings
    you've hammered from the bottom of the turkey roasting pan.
    
    Finally, the moment has arrived. The Sprouts are done to perfection
    (i.e. they're so over cooked they can be used as grape shot), the
    cabbage is limp and lifeless, the carrots cooked to mush, parsnips
    approaching their fundemental carbon form, and roast potatoes half cooked
    and swimming in grease. All your guest watch you load up the table (and 
    weren't you glad you shored up the middle with piles of bricks) and
    offer to help you (of course you turn them down, it being "no bother")
    and in the meantime the table groans and strains under the increasing
    load of mountainous food heaped on it; and you wonder what compressive 
    load common bricks will take before shattering.
    
    Then, the moment has finally arrived. The guests are seated round the
    feast in eager anticipation; stuffed from eating your finger food and
    pissed from consuming all the port, lager, wine, beer, etc. Your
    partner does the cerimonial duties (you are too knackered, in a state
    of shock and verging on complete physical exhaustion) and duely kick starts
    the chainsaw to hack through the turkey.
    
    Your guest politely chew and chew and chew and chew and chew and
    masticate their way through the bone dry turkey, grape shot sprouts and
    charred parsnips; taking relief by seiving carrots and cabbage through
    their teeth; and all the while commenting on how wonderful the meal is
    and how they shouldn't eat any more, but they will anyway; all the
    while you whisper in a catatonic haze that they must leave room for
    afters.
    
    At the end of a gorging hour, there is a relative silence, broken only
    by groans of those over stuffed guests collapsed on chairs, sofas,
    dining room floor claiming how miserable they are and how they
    shouldn't have eaten so much or the gentle chime of heart pace makers  
    informing the owners of their impending attack after consuming so vast
    a quantity of food and drink.
    
    Then, just as you thought it was safe to get the JCB in to clear the
    disaster area on the dining table: There's BOXING DAY, arrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
    
    
    NB whilst I have witness such scenes, this is not the way it is in the
    McDonald household. We have a traditional Goose, with well roasted
    potatoes, charming parsnips, sweet carrots and Brocolli. Pudding is
    either ice cream, Apple pie (avec Ice cream or custard) or Black Forest
    Gateau.
    
    Angus  

Some time on the middle of the night:
Daughter opens Christmas stocking and comes in to show Mum and Dad.

7ish
Get up, battle for the bathroom

8ish
Breakfast, all together, light breakfast but obligatory Bucks Fizz 
(drinking starts early!)

Wash up

10ish
All gather round Christmas tree for pressie handing out.

12ish
Neighbours round for more drinking and nibbly bits.

2ish
Lunch appears as if by magic. Women have preformed another miracle!
Soup 
Turkey with Sausagemeat/herb stuffing and oat/chestnut/apricot stuffing
	Sausages wrapped in bacon
	Roast pots
	Roast Parsnips
	Buttery Carrots
	Brussels
	Redcurrant and Orange Sauce
	Lashings of Gravy
Cristmas pud
	Brandy butter
	Custard
	Cream
Cheeses and port
Coffee/Tea

Flake out.
Men do the washing up.

5ish
Tea time: Ham sandwiches, sausage rolls Christmas Cake, trifle, 
Christmas log, mince pies, tangerines etc

7pm ish
Flake out again
Family games
TV/Film

I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!

C  

When you say "sausages wrapped in bacon," do you mean pork sausage - the
kind with savory and thyme and sage etc? Do you bake them on a sheet in
the oven, or are they pan fried?

I'm wondering if Paxo is the equivalent of TableTop Stuffing Mix?

Love these descriptions, by the way... 

Thanks, 

Art

    Re -.1
    
    "sausages wrapped in bacon". A small sausage is used, typically a
    chipolata. Its about the size of an adult's thumb. A piece of British
    streaky bacon (i.e. 80-90% meat, as opposed to the American version) is
    wrapped around the sausage and secured, normally with half a tooth
    pick. Grill them, fry them, bake them, whatever's easier. They can be
    served hot or cold; normally they're cold and have fat nicely congealed
    on them. If you can't be bothered to make them you can buy them
    pre-made from the supermarket; some shops (M&S) sell them ready cooked,
    shrunk wrapped in an 'attractive' (plastic) serving plate.
    
> I'm wondering if Paxo is the equivalent of TableTop Stuffing Mix?
    
    Yep.
    Comes in a box. Processed in a factory. Made in Britain.
    
    I need not illucidate further to describe the gastronomic horror that  
    lies within.
    
    
    As an aside...
    Christmas is a surprisingly stressful time, particularly for women
    folk. Not only is there the (natural) desire to get things right and
    make things as smooth and enjoyable as possible, there is the added
    stress of family, friends and neighbours. It is perhaps the family that
    generates the most stress; with parents and/or in-laws making highly
    critical remarks. In recent years, during the run up to The Event,
    there are numerous articles and programs on how to reduce the stress, set
    expectations and plan for the feast. I find the level of stress,
    frustration and virtual paranoia expressed in these articles quite
    extraordinary and sadly so true.
    
    Angus

    1543

    Kirsi,
    
    How do Fins celebrate christmas? Foods, drinks, etc.
    
    Angus

    re .1 ODDONE::Corfieldm
    
    Could you enter your recipe for sausage/chestnut stuffing? Sounds
    GREAT!
    
    Thanks,
    ~beth

    I noticed references to "Christmas pudding", "Christmas cake" and
    "Christmas log", with narry a definition (recipe) in sight.
    
    							Ann B.

    Note 3890 points to note 3451 where one eventually finds a reply with
    an evolved recipe for Christmas pud. It looks about right, and if you
    end up with an evil looking black ball, about the weight and texture of
    a cannonball, then you've got a christmas pud.
    
    Curiously, I cannot see a note for Christmas cake; unless (as with the
    christmas pud recipe) its buried in a generically titled topic.
    Consider a christmas cake to be almost like a christmas pud, except
    replace the suet with flour i.e. its a glorified fruit cake.
    
    A Christmas log (the ones I've seen) is basically a christmas cake made
    into a log shape and sometimes covered in a layer of marzipan.
    
    Unless someone can provide a pointer to an existing note for christmas
    cake, I'll bring my Great British cook book in and enter a recipe. But
    note, christmas pud, christmas cake, christmas log etc all have
    regional variations of ingredients, preparation, storage and thence
    cooking.
    
    Angus
    NB I can't stand christmas pud. The best way to eat a small piece of
    christmas pud is to drown it in a gallon of double cream and consume
    lots of brandy.

    
    
    The Christmas Log cake I've seen (also called a Yule log) is basically a
    chocolate swiss roll. Its often filled with a rich flavoured butter
    cream, rum, brandy, kirsch (sp?) etc. Sometimes a second swiss-roll is 
    made and cut about 2/3 of the way along its length at an oblique angle 
    to make a 'branch' for the log:
    
    
     ________________
    |                |
    |                |
    |________________|
          \    \
           \    \
            \_ __\
    
    
    The whole assembly is then covered in chocolate butter icing (soft
    chocolate frosting) and textured to look like bark. Then its dusted
    with icing sugar to look like snow, and holly sprigs etc. added as
    decoration.
    
    The combination of chocolate swiss-roll and chocolate butter icing
    is not one of my favourite taste sensations. If you like very rich
    chocolate cakes, however, you'll probably like the typical Yule log. 
    
    
    
    
    

    We've missed THE English Christmas nibble of all time: Mince or
    Mincemeat pies. When attempting to ake Mincemeat pies through US
    customs, one must not on any account called them mincemeat pies. There
    is not a trace of meat in mincemeat pies, but the poor customs
    officials' grasp of this fact is in direct proportion to their average
    IQ.
    
    Anyway, here is a Christmas Cake recipe from the British Cookery book;
    apologies for no metric weights and measures.
    
    1 lb butter
    1 lb soft brown sugar
    9 eggs
    1 1/4 lb plain flour
    1/2 teaspoon salt
    3/4 oz mixed spice or cinnamon
    1 lb currants
    4 oz chopped raisins
    1 lb sultanas
    4 oz chopped citron peel
    4 oz chopped mixed peel
    4 oz blanched chopped almonds
    1/2 lb chopped glace cherries
    Grated rind of 1/2 lemon
    2 oz black treacle
    5 fl oz rum
    Vanilla, almond or ratafia essence
    
    Oven: 325 F; gas mark 3; 160 C (?); 4 1/2 - 5 hours
    
    Cut the butter into small pieces and cream with the sugar until light
    and fluffy; beat the eggs in a large bowl set over a pan of hot water
    and then whisk into the creamed mixture. Fold in the flour with salt and
    mixed spices, alternately with the dried fruits, citron and mixed peel,
    almonds, cherries and lemon rind. Finally, add the treacle, rum and a
    few drops of essence.
      Turn the cake mixture into a double-lined and greased, 12 in cake
    tins and level the top making sure no air pockets are left. Tie a
    couple layers of brown paper round the sides of the tin and stand it on
    a double layer of newspaper in the oven and bake for 4 1/2 - 5 hours.
    If the cake browns on top before the end of cooking time, cover the top
    with a double layer of greaseproof or brown paper.
      Leave the cake to cool completely before decorating it; it will kepp
    for several weeks if stored in foil and an airtight tin. Cover the
    cake, top and sides, with almond paste or marzipan and leave to set.
    Spread Royal Icing over the marzipan and pipe on decorations in plain
    or coloured Royal Icing.
    
    Angus 

As I remember the log is a made from a swiss roll, not xmas cake. The thought
of Choc butter creeam on a fruit cake could put me of my fried black(blood)
pudding for Christmas breakfeast.

The Christmas pudding really is best made the year before.

Re -1
Mincemeat does not contain meat, much like a banger, but down contain beef suet
so the'd still officially be banned.

With some experience in the US, yes the recipe is about right ( its flexable
anyway ) but some things will get lost in the translation ....

1) Its too late, even my Mother ( comming over for xmas )  has given up asking
if I made one yet - she started in August. After its baked and before the Almond
paste ( no not the cheap marzipan ) is placed on the cake using Apricot Jam
as glue, there's the 3 months min of every week drizzeling brandy on the cake
about a cup full, but keep going just stop for the last couple of weeks
to made sure the paste will stick..

2) There's the fruit. - we soak it in the rum overnight then add more to the
cake. 

currants very very small raisins - they look like currants - Never seen in US

chopped raisins very very large raisins - they look like prunes, hence the need 
to chop - again Mom's bringing some over

sultanas the one thing that is a raisin we done call a raisin ( they are 
available) "golden raisins" are the closest

Use black treacle - molasses is not really close enough - this is available
but expensive

What ever we do to citron peel, mixed peel, glace cherries they dont taste the
	same - again some will arrive in the next few weeks

finally the icing is decorated with little plastic xmas trees, snow men, Robins
Santa's etc - yes Mom has a LARGE suitcase, I suspect a cake will be in their 
somewhere - although I have plenty since they can be reused

Assuming you make the cake dont forget the Stilton Cheese. 

    
    .2 ??  hahaha!  I actually burst out laughing over
    	   the narration! 
    
    it's the same all over the world actually - for me when I was at home
    celebrating the end of Ramadan, the entire household was just frenetic
    trying to get the feast(s) ready, special cakes and goodies made, new 
    clothes sewn .... everything. Makes me nostalgic remembering this!
    

    Sorry.......a bit late I know.
    
    Sausage and chestnut stuffing is very simply sausagemeat and a tin of
    pureed chestnuts.  Mix them both together and put in the oven.  You can
    add a bit of finely chopped onion and salt and pepper but nothing else
    really as the chestnuts are quite sweet in the stuffing.
    
    Regards
    Marie

Well, I made my Christmas cake yesterday, I don't think it is too late to make
one, although it it better to do it earlier.

Angus, your recipe doesn't include baking powder, won't it be a bit flat!

Anyway, here goes...

.5lb butter
.5lb caster sugar
12oz plain flour
.5 teaspoon baking powder
6 eggs
1.5lb mixed raisins and sultanas (soaked overnight in booze eg brandy or sherry)
4oz candied cherries
2oz mixed candied peel
2oz ground almonds
2oz chopped almonds
1 chopped apple
grated rind of 1 lemon
.5 glass brandy or whiskey

Mix all fruit and nuts together.
Cream butter and sugar.
Add eggs one at a time with a tablespoon of flour with each one to prevent
curdling.
Fold in remainder of flour and baking powder.
Fold in nut and fruit mixture carefully, but well.


Put into a 10" diameter cake tin that has been greased and lined with brown
paper and then greaseproof paper, hollowing out the mixture a little in the
centre.

Bake at gas mark 2 for 1 hour and at gas mark 1 for another 2.25 hours.

When the cake is cold, remove it from the tim, pierce it all over and pour
whiskey or brandy over it.  At intervals until you are ready to ice it, pour
more whiskey or brandy over it, this will keep the cake moist.

This cake will be a golden colour, unlike some othe Christmas cakes which can
be almost dark, due to the addition of treacle.

I hope you enjoy it.

Ann.

.5 glass brandy or whiskey
    
    How large a glass is that?  :-)
    
    ed

Ed,

I never measure it, I just pour straight from the bottle!

Ann.

    Ann,
    
    I went home last night and checked my British Cookery book: No baking
    powder (or any apparent rising agent) in recipe. Just in case there was
    a typo I checked some of the other recipes; some had and some hadn't a
    rising agent. However a pattern sort of emerged. The 'heavy/solid'
    cakes e.g. Christmas, Dundee etc seemed not to contain baking powder.
    
    The recipes in this particular book are as 'traditional' as possible.
    So I wondered if the recipe (dating from 18 something or other) was
    peculiar to that era. But no! In the November 1994 issue of the BBC Good
    Food magazine, there is a Christmas cake recipe and once again no
    baking powder. Perhaps a cake expert could comment. Cakes are an
    unknown territory to me.
    
    Back to the topic in hand. I spotted Haunch of Venison for sale in the
    butchers (the one opposite the Butts Center and the Co-op) in Reading.
    At �1.74/lb it looked good value, so my wife suggested we should have
    Haunch of Venison for our Christmas day meal. Sounds good to me. The
    only thing is I probably wont use a heavy marinade - though it all
    depends on whether the venison is wild or farmed. I think I'll still
    cook a goose for the other parts of the festive season, partly as my
    goose fat supply (from last Christmas) is running low. 
    
    Angus

    Turkey stuffed with chestnut and apples
    =======================================
    
    To stuff an average turkey, of about 12lb:
    
    2lb chestnuts
    1lb sweet apples
    6oz salted or fresh belly pork
    1/2 pint milk
    2 shallots
    parsely
    1 egg
    
    Make a crosswise incision across the rounded part of the chestnuts and
    roast them for 10-15 minutes in a moderate oven. Take out a few at a
    time and shell and skin them while still hot. Stew them in the milk, to
    which is added 1/4 pint of water, until they are soft. This will take
    about half an hour. Cut the pork into small dice and cook for 10
    minutes in a little water. Peel and core the apples; stew them in a
    very little water until reduced to a pur�e. Mix with the pork and the
    drained and roughly broken-up chestnuts. Season with salt and pepper
    and the finely chopped shallot and parsley, and bind with a beaten egg.
    
    The stuffed turkey, liberally rubbed with butter, is roasted on its
    side, if possible, in a slow oven, covered with buttered paper or,
    nowadays, aluminium foil.
    
    For a 12-lb turkey cooked at 330 degF, the average cooking time is
    about 3-1/2 hours. Turn it over at half time.
    
    If you prepare your stuffing in advance, remember to take it out of the
    refrigerator some time before cooking the turkey. If it is icy cold
    when the bird is put into the oven it will be so long before the heat
    penetrates that it will not do its work of lubricating the bird [and
    worse !].
    
    (Courtesy of Elizabeth David's "French Provincial Cooking")
    
    [Makes a beautiful stuffing, and produces a tender, moist turkey.]
    
    
    

>    The stuffed turkey, liberally rubbed with butter, is roasted on its
>    side, if possible, in a slow oven [...]			  ^^^^^^
     ^^^^
    
    You mean, like, with one leg on the bottom of the pan and one leg
    at the top? Sounds awkward. Why? Wouldn't you want to turn it over
    somewhere during the cycle?
    
      John

.19

If you're cooking venison be sure to marinade for at least a few hours, 
preferably overnight. And cook it low and slow, venni has hardly any fat 
in the muscle, if you cook it too high or fast it'll be tough and dry.

If you can get to a real game butcher get roe deer venison - infinitely 
superior to red deer venison.

Enjoy it!
Caroline

CHRISTMAS CAKES
Before you make your Christmas cake soak the currants, raisins, sultanas, 
cherries and candied peel in at least a half pint of brandy for a few 
days to a week. Stir it from time to time. This keeps the cake moist, 
avoids the need to "feed" it and makes it taste SCRUMMMMY!!! 

Christmas cakes don't need any raising agent. The mixture is so dense with 
fruit (there is really only enough mixture to hold the fruit together) 
that it couldn't rise if it wanted to! You'll feel the same after eating 
it!

To decorate: brush with warm seived apricot jam, cover with marzipan, 
leave for a day (or the marzipan will stain the icing), coat with 2 layers 
of royal icing (icing sugar/egg white/glycerine) leaving a day between 
each layer. Pipe with icing patterns or whatever.

CHRISTMAS LOG
This is a chocolate swiss roll, coated in choc butter icing, fork a bark 
pattern on it and dust with icing sugar. Incidentally, what's frosting? 
Butter icing is about 2oz butter mixed with about 8ox icing sugar and 
maybe a teeny bit (few drops) of hot water to make it easier to mix.

CHRISTMAS PUDDING
You're right, it's made with suet. It's preferably made months in advance, 
then steamed for a few hours on the day and eaten with brandy butter and 
custard. Has anyone mentioned that when it's made you should hide coins 
(traditionally sixpences) and other silver bits in. These days I usually 
wrap small coins in baking foil to be on the safe side. (Obviously watch 
out for small children and warn those with too many fillings!)

CHESTNUT STUFFING
One tin chestnuts, 1lb sausage meat, handful of oats, big onion finely 
chopped, plus pine nuts/chopped dried apricots/chopped apple/herbs and 
anything else you feel like throwing in all bound with an egg. Stuff the 
neck end only and/or make small stuffing balls and roast them round your 
bird. Make up your own family recipe, anything goes, that's half the fun.

Happy Christmas!
Caroline

Re -1..
CAKE
I'd soak and feed, you can never get too much brandy in the cake ;-)


PUDDING
The coin in the pud stored for months was the old sixpence, the one made
of silver from pre 19<mumble>. My parents still use one. 

The key is silver the metal, not the colour, I expect gold would be ok too ;-)

> If you can get to a real game butcher get roe deer venison - infinitely 
> superior to red deer venison.
    
    I think that it'll probably be a case of what they happen to have in. I
    also think that although they are general butchers they do specialise
    in game; can someone from the Reading area confirm. This seems to be a
    butchers in the traditional sense, certainly from what I can remember
    as a kid. They have unskinned rabbits, the odd unskinned deer,
    unplucked pheasants, etc hanging from a wall in the shop.
    
    However, apart from asking the butchers, is there an easy way for the
    layman to tell which is which? i.e. Red vs Roe
    
    I thnk the order of Christmas will be:
    
    Christmas day: Venison
    Boxing day+ : Left over venison
    Some point between Boxing day and New years day: Goose
    Christmas day: Ham
    
    Angus

Angus

The texture of red deer is coarser. I can tell the difference by taste 
easier than by looking at the meat. Roe isn't farmed so he may be unable 
to get it in the deep south, if you can do though!  Whatever, venison is 
good.

Caroline

    >  > The stuffed turkey, liberally rubbed with butter, is roasted on its
    >  > side, if possible, in a slow oven [...]		      ^^^^^^
    > 
    > You mean, like, with one leg on the bottom of the pan and one leg
    > at the top? Sounds awkward. Why? Wouldn't you want to turn it over
    > somewhere during the cycle?
    
    yes, you turn it over half way through cooking (see original note). 
    It means that each breast of the bird is both lubricated, by the cooking 
    juices and the stuffing, and browned. Cook it right-way-up and the breast 
    dries out before the turkey is fully cooked; upside down and the breast 
    doesn't brown well.
    
    Jim
    

    One way to get around moving the bird during the sacrifical 
    roasting is to wrap it in cheesecloth and drip it with butter.
    The butter will end in the bottom of the pan combined with
    stuff from the bird which is called juices.  Use a turkey
    baster or a big spoon during the cooking process to pour or
    baste the bird during the roasting periord.  When cooked, 
    remove cheesecloth and  wring out over the remaining pan 
    juices for making gravy.


    justme....jacqui


    p.s.  An old, torn, clean bedsheet will do also!