Conference trucks::football;1

252.0. "Banter? You must be joking!" by YUPPY::MCCABE (Mike) Thu Jul 30 1992 16:26

    It would seem that the Newspapers have heard about Football Notes.  A
    reporter tracked down one of our fellow contributors and the following
    is, so I'm led to believe, what occurred.
    
    
    Noterman:  Hang on before we start, I've got to scum, trash or 
    filth someone.  I know....Man United.  "You lucky scummers I hope 
    you get trashed on Saturday.  :-)"  There, done it, brilliant.  
    'Smiley' on the end, therefore it's funny.  Bill Shakespeare eat 
    your heart out.
    
    Interviewer:  Is everything in Notes of this standard?
    
    Noterman:  Naaah!  Most of it aint as good as this! 
    
    Interviewer:  What about discussions on things like the Premier 
    League, all seater stadiums, hooliganism, big business, bond 
    schemes and the like.
    
    Noterman:  Well there is some of that, but banter is what it's 
    really all about, innit?  Did I tell you there's this guy who 
    keeps putting in replies telling everyone how many trophies 
    Liverpool have won and what a great player John Aldridge is.  
    Laugh!?  I almost wet meself!   
    
    Interviewer:  Sounds a bit like a repeat of the same Des O'Connor 
    show every night, with Des telling the same jokes...
    
    Noterman:  Des O'Connor?  Who does he play for?  No really, it's 
    great.  Funneee!  Did I mention the predictions, they're great 
    too.    
    
    Interviewer:  So football notes is full of "banter" and 
    predictions?  That sounds a bit like a tabloid newspaper to me.  
    Tell me, "Noterman", what's the difference between football notes 
    and the tabloids?
    
    Noterman:  Erm, is this an Essex girl joke?  No?  Oh well, for one 
    thing football notes has got no tits.  Hang on a minute there are 
    Arsenal and Man Utd supporters' in Notes.  Geddit!  Geddit!  Tits 
    = Arsenal and Man Utd supporters.  Banter, banter!  Cor, what a 
    wit I am!
    
    Interviewer:  I suspect your only half right there.  
    
    Noterman:  What?  Oh right?  Did I tell you that you can put in 
    any old rubbish, doesn't matter if it's true or not.  What a 
    wind-up that is!  And if anyone complains you roll out the old 
    chestnut about them having no sense of humour and you tell 'em to 
    lighten up.  Banter, banter!  Yeah, it's great this Notes.  Do you 
    wanna have a look see?
    
    Interviewer:  Hmmm.  Lies, banter and predictions.  I think I'll 
    pass, thank you.
    

    Mike,
    	
    What category does your note come under...
    
    Lies,Banter or Predictions ?
    
    :-)
    
    Kev...

Messrs Mod,

Please move the drivel .0 to topic 46.

Thanks,

Stuart 

    I think I'm with you on that one Stuart.
    
    Stew.
    
    Look! No smiley... geddit??!!??
    

    Well I thought .0 was funny anyway.  But then you've got to have a
    sense of humour to support etc, etc, yawn, yawn.
    
    Adrian
    

    Mike,
    
    I thought it was good too. Some excellent lies and banter but an
    oversight on your part was the predictions. Maybe something like
    football notes is going to flourish next season and pick up an award or
    two from BAFTA.
    
    Jim.