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Conference thebay::joyoflex

Title:	The Joy of Lex
Notice:	A Notes File even your grammar could love
Moderator:	THEBAY::SYSTEM

Created:	Fri Feb 28 1986
Last Modified:	Mon Jun 02 1997
Last Successful Update:	Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:	1192
Total number of notes:	42769

1094.0. "Newts and ants." by PASTIS::MONAHAN (humanity is a trojan horse) Mon Apr 11 1994 00:15

    	A few years ago I was introduced to the mother of a colleague at
    a New Year party. They were looking after a neighbour's dog, and she
    was a little concerned because it didn't bark when she played with it.
    I suggested "Perhaps it's a newt". She replied "No, it can't be a newt
    because it's hairy, but perhaps it's a newtation". I knewt I had found
    a kindred spirit, and under the afluence of incohol we spent the the
    rest of the evening talking about newts. Efforts of others at the party
    to change the subject were as futile as King Canewt trying to turn
    back the waves. Later she got her daughter to send me "eftronic mail"
    to continue the discussion ("eft" is an old word for "newt" that you
    would only find in some dialects now).
    
    	Just recently something surfaced from the depths of my memories.
    Many years ago I saw something on a cubicle wall about ants. There
    were a series of simple drawings illustrating Arrog-ant, Ant-ique,
    etc. 
    
    	I would be grateful if anyone happens to have a copy of this that I
    could send to her, and also wondered if any other animals could be
    subjected to the same treatment. I suspect it would be very
    difficult with more than one syllable, and I tried "snake" but that
    didn't seem to produce much. Can anyone suggest others?

T.R	Title	User	Personal Name	Date	Lines
1094.1	853.*	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Prototyping: �Stubs 'R' Us�	`Mon Apr 11 1994 05:23`	10
	(But I have to admit, I didn't "get" your first sally, before her reply -- They were looking after a neighbour's dog, and she was a little concerned because it didn't bark when she played with it. I suggested "Perhaps it's a newt". She replied "No, it can't be a newt because it's hairy, but perhaps it's a newtation". Could you elucidate, though this will lessen the fun? Tnx... Pardon my density...)
1094.2		PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Mon Apr 11 1994 06:34`	5
	try "mute" and "mutation". It works better in a drunken New Year party. When the others tried to rathole our conversation into a discussion of the British royal family we decided that one particular member was snewty. It is well known that ant-ropy tends to bend some letters at times.
1094.3	Hey, whaddaya know? It's STILL funny!!	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Prototyping: �Stubs 'R' Us�	`Mon Apr 11 1994 07:37`	2
	Tnx!
1094.4	toad	REFDV1::LUST	Five cats = love & fun	`Mon Apr 11 1994 08:20`	6
	Another animal that works well is 'toad' - try replacing certain words in songs during a long car ride with punchy people, all of whom are anxiously looking for a pit stop! It was a near disaster! Linda 8-}
1094.5	other fauna	GIDDAY::BURT	Scythe my dandelions down, sport	`Mon Apr 11 1994 17:02`	5
	I once went to a party with a bunch of customs agents, who decided to develop "Aardvaark Imports". Chele
1094.6		DRDAN::KALIKOW	Moi, �Info .NOT.�? no, Infonaut	`Mon Apr 11 1994 18:53`	3
	Vell I'll tell ya Chele, it's pretty aardvaark understanding the joke in .5... Hints please? :)
1094.7		GIDDAY::BURT	Scythe my dandelions down, sport	`Mon Apr 11 1994 19:18`	6
	Aardvaark - tell the kids today about aardvaark and they _won't believe you_! It's nice vaark if you can get it :^) Chele
1094.8	vaark on the vile side	GIDDAY::BURT	Scythe my dandelions down, sport	`Mon Apr 11 1994 19:20`	1

1094.9	all vaark adenoid play...	ALLVAX::GELINEAU		`Tue Apr 12 1994 09:22`	0
1094.10	I did'ant get that, please 'spleen it...?	DRDAN::KALIKOW	Moi, �Info .NOT.�? no, Infonaut	`Tue Apr 12 1994 10:11`	1

1094.11	it's a dawg..	AUSSIE::WHORLOW	Bushies do it for FREE!	`Tue Apr 12 1994 16:57`	14
	G'day, Gosh it's aardvaark explaining evryting to em at dozen ant sea. If'n u vaark from doe'n to tusk, you'm gunner bee tyred. Cos dat's a lawn team tu bee vaaarkin - get der vaaarkin massage? Indeed, u gunner end in der horsepital with oinkment on yer pandas if'n yer vaaark all day in der fieldmouse. Aardvaark also has the benefit of being close to the front of the list inthe yellow pages... derek
1094.12	c'est aardvark fourmi !	BBRDGE::LOVELL	� l'eau; c'est l'heure	`Wed Apr 13 1994 03:07`	0
1094.13	:-) <-- souris --> (-:	DRDAN::KALIKOW	DEC and Internet: Webalong together	`Wed Apr 13 1994 05:56`	1

1094.14	Off down a rathole...	WELSWS::HILLN		`Wed Apr 13 1994 06:58`	1
	What's the origin of the phrase "...as a newt" meaning full of alcohol?
1094.15	A Guess	CUPMK::WAJENBERG		`Wed Apr 13 1994 07:51`	4
	Maybe from the fact that many people encounter newts in high school biology class, pickled in alcohol? Earl Wajenberg
1094.16		NOTIME::SACKS	Gerald Sacks ZKO2-3/N30 DTN:381-2085	`Wed Apr 13 1994 07:53`	1
	Wilbur Mills had an alcohol problem, but I didn't know that Rep. Gingrich does.
1094.17		DRDAN::KALIKOW	DEC and Internet: Webalong together	`Wed Apr 13 1994 08:28`	2
	Cute "1-level-indirect-addressing" stroke!
1094.18		GIDDAY::BURT	Scythe my dandelions down, sport	`Wed Apr 13 1994 21:46`	7
	"Aardvark a million miles..." Songs are fun, substitution of other organs for "heart", "lunch/lung" for "love" Chele
1094.19		PASTIS::MONAHAN	humanity is a trojan horse	`Thu Apr 14 1994 00:39`	3
	In the meantime, has anyone actually seen those ant cartoons? The woman I mentioned in .0 has recently had operations and medication for skin cancer, and could use something cheering up.