| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 871.1 | | PASTIS::MONAHAN | humanity is a trojan horse | Mon Feb 18 1991 08:53 | 3 |
| I had just made up my mind that I would send mail to ask
CLEARING_HSE if he/she/it had a real name, and to thank Polly for her
valuable contributions. Many thanks from the current moderator.
|
| 871.2 | but Polly's smarter | CSSE32::RANDALL | Pray for peace | Tue Feb 19 1991 15:47 | 4 |
| I'll miss your wit, sidesplitting puns, and incredible
double-entendres . . . thanks and good luck.
--bonnie, ZKO, Nashua, NH
|
| 871.3 | How much is that doggerel in the window? | STAR::RDAVIS | Untimely ripp'd | Tue Feb 19 1991 17:28 | 6 |
| The best long pieces I've seen in JOYOFLEX. Most of us have trouble
just coming up with complete.
Hail and g'wan, get outta here, ya kehrazy!
Ray
|
| 871.4 | Oh no he isn't! | DUCK::CLEARING_HSE | King Glott | Tue Feb 19 1991 22:27 | 39 |
| 871 Letsby Avenue,
Pilkington,
Cheshire,
England.
Dear Mr Kalikow,
Quite frankly, sir, I am disgusted! How you and your sort have the
timerity to sing the praises of a beast like Patman is quite beyond me.
My sweet, fragrant daughter Polly had the misfortune to be lured by the
slick and sickening "charm" of this sleaze merchant, and torn from
the bosom of her loving family into a web of corruption. Before long
(and no doubt under considerable pressure from this monster) Polly was
allowing her name to be put to the most shocking, pornographic rubbish.
I don't know who these gentlemen Mr Nash and Mr Thurber are, but I am
sure that they are turning in their respective graves at the thought of
their names being associated with vermin like Patman. (Should either
of these gentlemen still be alive, I apologise for my assumption of
their demise, but I am sure they will understand.)
To prove to you just what a blackguard this person is, let me tell you
(** This section censored on grounds of taste. DM, Moderator **)
and twice with the donkey.
Now I am sure you understand my concern. I appeal to you as a family
man, Mr Kalikow, cast this demon from your midst and use your benign
influence to persuade Polly to return home.
Yours sincerely,
King Glott (Polly's Pa)
|
| 871.5 | | VISA::MONAHAN | humanity is a trojan horse | Tue Feb 19 1991 22:53 | 1 |
| OOps, missed the bit about the donkey. Consider it censored.
|
| 871.6 | Hey JOYOFLEXers, think of this as a (-:joyous?:-) wake... | NEMAIL::KALIKOWD | Parody Error -- Please retry | Wed Feb 20 1991 01:55 | 60 |
| Brian and Polly are
Untimely Ripp'd from us!
Here's the Condolence Book,
It's yours and mine.
Shall their departure be
unceremonious?
Heaven Forfend, NO!
Sign Here, on the line.
---===[[[{{{ ( ( G U E S T B O O K ) ) }}}}}}===---
1. ___PASTIS::MONAHAN_____
2. ___CSSE32::RANDALL_____
3. ___STAR::RDAVIS________
4. ___King Glott__________ (though truth to tell there IS some question here)
.
.
C'mon folks, I understand how it's possible to get tongue-tied when being asked
to perform, without any inspiration... So! The above doggerel and the other
offerings in .1 -.4 (?4?) etc. are right in (at least my hope for the) spirit
of this note... So I offer the aforescrivened 'umble 'ig Pig in the hope that
it might serve as the bit of grit around which various pearls of JOYOFLEXitude
can, hopefully, coalesce... the more pearls (before us pigs) the better!
One JOYOFLEXer said: (and I quote here without permission, Sorry 'bout that,
Mr. Wilde:-) "I myself blanch and block in front of guest books at country
houses, for example, much to the embarrassment of the hosts who are circling
over me like wit-buzzards waiting for fresh meat. ... But I finally decided
that Something Must Be Done, 'cause Polly & Her Pals are just too-too good-good
for words, which is probably why it is so difficult to come up with any."
Simple puns, Hig-Pigs, Abominable!s, Polysyllables,
insert_your_pet_lexical_craziness_here, bogus evocations of hypothetical
fragrant family bosoms, simple puns, literary allusions, complex puns, blank
verse, simple puns, vague generalities, tongue twisters, heartfelt encomia,
jargon, florid Au Revoirs, simple signatures, or -- if you can't think of
anything better -- even simple puns are appropriate upon this Auspicious
Occasion.
This is a GOING-AWAY PARTY! So, folks, can we "take it as read" that _I've_
just done the ASCII equivalent of putting a lampshade on my head? Now, after
MONAHAN, RANDALL, and RDAVIS have done THEIR thing, who's gonna do the NEXT
stupid guest trick? :-)
Over to you, JOYOFLEXers...
Your Party-Hearty Host, Dan Kalikow
(Who once, in total desperation, signed a B&B Guest Book as "James and Felicia
Bond, New South Wales!" :-)
.
.
N. ___YOUR_NAME_HERE_______
.
.
.
|
| 871.7 | Best of luck, Brian. | STAR::CANTOR | IM2BZ2P | Wed Feb 20 1991 06:20 | 0 |
| 871.8 | Life of Brain | ODIXIE::LAMBKE | He's the casurist? | Wed Feb 20 1991 18:38 | 26 |
| Kalikow Kalikow
How very nice of you:
Throwing a wake like this
for a far friend.
Glott warns you Brian is
Supercorruptible
Rhyming his way to a
devious end.
'Cause Brian Pat� man
(CLEARING_HSE) teases you -
Punning his way to your
Heart like a whore.
Leaving you for a new
preoccupational
joy of lex fam'ly is
now his fit chore.
(Not finding any worthwhile rhymes for Olivia, Beatrice, or Rebecca, I'll
just say good luck to them also.
- Rick - father of 3-year-old and 11-month-old boys)
|
| 871.9 | And thanks for all the fish | MARVIN::KNOWLES | Domimina nustio illumea | Wed Feb 27 1991 14:43 | 10 |
| Higgledy Piggledy
That's what my schedules are
Haven't tuned in for a
Good many days
Hig-pig.l has bagged
`valedictorian'
Words therefore fail me
(The heavens be praise
d)
|
| 871.10 | | JIT081::DIAMOND | This note is illegal tender. | Mon Mar 04 1991 07:31 | 2 |
| Seems this note sprouted and died while I was on vacation.
Here is my feeble effort to be a pollybearer.
|
| 871.11 | | JIT081::DIAMOND | This note is illegal tender. | Tue Mar 19 1991 06:23 | 102 |
| From: [email protected] (Peter Lisle)
Newsgroups: rec.puzzles,comp.lang.misc,alt.folklore.computers
Subject: A polyglot program
Date: 18 Mar 91 13:19:07 GMT
A little while ago some people were talking about polyglot programs in
rec.puzzles, these are programs that are written in several languages.
We thought it sounded like fun so we wrote this one.
Our friends suggested we should post it -- so here it is, let us know
what you think.
-------- cut here (keep the blank lines: they are important) --------
(*O/*_/
Cu #%* )pop mark/CuG 4 def/# 2 def%%%%@@P[TX---P\P_SXPY!Ex(mx2ex("SX!Ex4P)Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%*------------------------------------------------------------------*+Ex=
CuG #%* POLYGLOT - a program in seven languages 15 February 1991 *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* Written by Kevin Bungard, Peter Lisle, and Chris Tham *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* We have successfully run this program using the following: *+Ex=
CuG #%* ANSI COBOL: MicroFocus COBOL85 (not COBOL74) *+Ex=
CuG #%* ISO Pascal: Turbo Pascal (DOS & Mac), Unix PC, *+Ex=
CuG #%* AIX VS Pascal *+Ex=
CuG #%* ANSI Fortran: Unix f77, AIX VS Fortran *+Ex=
CuG #%* ANSI C (lint free): Microsoft C, Unix CC, GCC, Turbo C++, *+Ex=
CuG #%* Think C (Mac) *+Ex=
CuG #%* PostScript: GoScript, HP/Adobe cartridge, *+Ex=
CuG #%* Apple LaserWriter *+Ex=
CuG #%* Shell script: gnu bash, sh (SysV, BSD, MKS), ksh *+Ex=
CuG #%* 8086 machine language: MS-DOS 2.00, 3.03, 4.01, 5.00 beta *+Ex=
CuG #%* VPix & DOS Merge (under unix) *+Ex=
CuG #%* SoftPC (on a Mac), MKS shell *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* Usage: *+Ex=
CuG #%* 1. Rename this file to polyglot.[cob|pas|f77|c|ps|sh|com] *+Ex=
CuG #%* 2. Compile and/or run with appropriate compiler and *+Ex=
CuG #%* operating system *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* Notes: *+Ex=
CuG #%* 1. We have attempted to use only standard language features. *+Ex=
CuG #%* Without the -traditional flag gcc will issue a warning. *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* 2. This text is a comment block in all seven languages. *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* 3. When run as a .COM file with MS-DOS it makes certain *+Ex=
CuG #%* (not unreasonable) assumptions about the contents of *+Ex=
CuG #%* the registers. *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* 4. When transfering from Unix to DOS make sure that a LF *+Ex=
CuG #%* is correctly translated into a CR/LF. *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%* Please mail any comments, corrections or additions to *+Ex=
CuG #%* [email protected] *+Ex=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%*------------------------------------------------------------------*QuZ=
CuG #%* *+Ex=
CuG #%*!Mx)ExQX4ZPZ4SP5n#5X!)Ex+ExPQXH,B+ExP[-9Z-9Z)GA(W@'UTTER_XYZZY'CPK*+
CuG #(* *(
C # */); /*(
C # *) program polyglot (output); (*+
C # identification division.
C # program-id. polyglot.
C #
C # data division.
C # procedure division.
C #
C # * ))cleartomark /Bookman-Demi findfont 36 scalefont setfont (
C # * (
C #
C # * hello polyglots$
C # main.
C # perform
C * ) 2>_$$; echo "hello polyglots"; rm _$$; exit
print
C stop run.
-*, 'hello polyglots'
C
C print.
C display "hello polyglots". (
C */ int i; /*
C */ main () { /*
C */ i=printf ("hello polyglots\n"); O= &i; return *O; /*
C *) (*
C *) begin (*
C *) writeln ('hello polyglots'); (*
C *) (* )
C * ) pop 60 360 (
C * ) pop moveto (hello polyglots) show (
C * ) pop showpage ((
C *)
end .(* )
C)pop% program polyglot. *){*/}
------------------------------ cut here --------------------------------------
Have fun...
Peter
|