| Hi Judy, Mazal Tov for your son's Bar Mitzvah!!!
My son's Bar-Mitzvah was 3 years ago, here in Israel, and I doubt
that all my expereiences and recommendations here would be applicable
to you.
We had 2 parties: one for my son's friends - that was held at a
local "Mc Donald's" (sort of), where they put aside some area for the
kids to dance and play and the other one was held for family and
friends, in a garden that was covered with plastic and heated.
Of course, in Israel, kosher is far less a problem than abroad: Most
catering and restaurants - including the pseudo "Mc Donald's" -
are kosher.
The point I would like to make a suggestion is this:
The Bar Mitzvah is the ceremony by which the child accepts the
"Mitzvoth" or commandments of the Jewish law. It would be very
contradicting - to say the least - to have a celebration for the
acceptance of said Mitzvoth, where you would be breaking the same
commandmants. Though I am not known for keeping kosher at all, I
would say that for the particular occasion of a Bar Mitzvah, I would
(and I did) go for a traditional, kosher, catering.
Best regards, and, again, Mazal tov!
Juan-Carlos Kiel
|
| Hi Judy,
I hope this helps you out a little.
> Hi,
>
> We are trying to plan for a bar mitzvah party/reception for my son.
> The date is set for Dec 25th. Need ideas/comments on:
>
> 1) Not too expensive way of having the party/reception. WHERE:
> (names of kosher/non-kosher caterers, clubs, restaurants would
> be welcome. Approximately 50-60 people). There will be
> refreshments at the Temple after the ceremony (room not big
> enough to do anything much there). WHEN: 25th Dec evening
> after sundown? Being X'Mas will that be a problem? 26th Dec
> afternoon?
Can't help you with a location because I live in Australia. If you are
inviting non-Jewish people they probably wont come. X'mas is important to
them.
> 2) Whether to have live music? M.C? What would be fun for
> kids ranging in ages from 6 to 14 but not outrageously
> expensive? Is it necessary to give gifts or whatever they
> are called to the kids/attendees?
I don't know how you do things on your side of the world but I never
received any gifts at any Bar-Mitzvah that I 've been to. I never gave any
at mine either.
Live music is always great as long as you get a band that can play well and
has some of the latest hits on their play list. Are you into Hora or
Israeli dancing ? Then you should have a band that can play this sort of
stuff. I did and I loved it.
Make the MC someone that you boy knows and likes.
>
> 3) What to do and NOT to do at these occasions (we do not have
> much experience with this). Would non-Jewish friends appreciate
> being invited to the ceremony or would they get bored?
>
We had quite a few non-Jewish friends to my Bar-Mitzvah and they enjoyed it
more that most of the Jewish people. I have found that Jewish celebrations
are nothing like those of non-Jews and so they appreciate the differences
even more than most. Hey it's also a free feed !! Watch out for the X'mas
thing...they may not come.
We gave each guest a tree in Israel. I don't know if you do this over there
but all you have to do is make a donation to the JNF (Jewish National Fund)
and they supply you with lovely certificates.
Do what you like as long as
- You can afford it
- You feel comfortable with it
- Your son likes the idea
If you have any questions regarding religious aspects you should ask you
Rabbi. I'm sure he'll oblige.
> 4) How to handle just a handful of strictly "kosher" folks. I
> assume it will be more expensive to do all "kosher".
In Australia a Kosher event is always more expensive. If your friends are
so strictly Kosher you may have a problem. If you have something like fish
on the menu or a vegetarian event then they should probably go for that.
My Bar-Mitzvah was Kosher but my wedding wasn't. We had baked Atlantic
Salmon or our guests could choose to have Char grilled vegetables with
noodles and a small amount of salsa. Sounds weird but it's sort of nouvelle
Australian sort of food.
If you go Kosher you must do Benching (Grace After Meals). Most people
expect this at a Jewish function. It is not necessary if you do not have
kosher. There is a long form (5-10 Minutes) and a short form (45 Seconds).
>
> Looking forward to input and comments.
>
> Thanks
> Judy
>
>
REMEMBER: HAVE FUN AND ENJOY EVERY MOMENT.....DON'T FORGET THE VIDEO
CAMERA.
Regards
Steven Bloom
DECdirect
Sydney Australia
|
| Live music can get expensive - say about $1000. You can get a great disk
jockey for half that. A good one will keep the kids from being bored while
the adults do whatever they do.
At many of the bar/bat mitzvahs I went to last year (my twins were 13 last
year so there were lots of them) there were "party favors" handed out to the
kids. I saw T-shirts, ceramic mugs, plastic cups, battery powered clocks, and
gadgets of various kinds, often with the bar mitzvah child's name on them.
It seems to me these should be optional: don't do it unless you want to.
There's all kinds of "kosher", from "fish in a non-kosher restaurant is OK" to
the kind of person who has to have references for the rabbi who supervises the
kitchen. If you don't know your guests' requirements your best bet may be
to just ask. Someone who keeps Shabbat will have a problem with a party on
Saturday afternoon.
You will be competing with Xmas parties for rooms suitable for your party.
Reserve your room and your caterer ASAP. Then reserve your entertainment.
The other stuff needs 2 or 3 months' lead time so you don't have a lot of
leeway on that either. Ask for contacts at your Temple. Node IAMOK is in
Maynard so you might be able to use the people we used last year. Ask
by MAIL if interested.
Dave
|