| Adriane,
Although I don't have anyone to set you up with, I would like to
comment on your situation (not an uncommon one in this day and age).
Unfortunately, there are not a great number of single, eligible,
jewish men available (at least not in NY...no one would believe
that, but it's true!) and sometimes you have to go outside your
own circle to find a giving, caring, warm man. I don't know this
for a fact, but I don't think that the relationship broke up simply
over religious affiliation...there had to be other circumstances.
If not, then this guy was not the one for you to begin with, so
take that to the bank!
There is one thing that I do have to comment on...and this comes
from the heart (it also comes from being a reform jew!). I don't
think that interfaith relationships are all bad. I think that the
problem that comes with interfaith relationships is that the people
involved don't share or don't take the time to share of their religions
with the other person. Sometimes it's because that other person
doesn't want to know from it, and in that case, you shouldn't want
to know from him. But in other cases, if the two involved are both
willing to share of themselves (including their religious beliefs),
then there shouldn't be a problem. We all try very hard in our
day-to-day lives to fight against anti-semitism, and then go right
out and say we wouldn't date anyone that isn't jewish....sort of
strange, don't you think? It seems to me that it's not a person's
religious affiliation that is important, but how that person is
to you, how he treats you, and so forth. My mother is sure that
I am destined NOT to marry a jewish guy, because all those that
I have dated (except for a current beau) have been jerks...not because
they were jewish, but because they were jerks! I just don't want
to perpetuate the bigotry any longer.
I know that I'll probably get a lot of heat from this, but please
understand that I am a jew because I feel it in my heart, not because
I was born into the religion. I would NEVER convert, I would never
ask a significant other to convert either, I would just try and
help him understand that my religion is as important as his, and
there has to be room for both in any relationship!
Jill
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| Hi Adriane,
It figures females would reply. I just want to say
"keep the faith" in more ways than one. You sound
like a very nice, sensitive and caring person who
needs a little encouragement right now. I would
advise you as your mother would to live your life,
get involved with Jewish organizations and make
contacts. While you're busy and enjoying yourself
you just might meet the right Jewish man and he'll
be very fortunate to have found you.
Bernice
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