Conference taveng::bagels

Reply to:
>>>< Note 237.0 by SWATT::POLIKOFF "My apple trees have no peers." >
>>>                      -< Merrimack Valley Hebrew Academy >-

>>>    	I am thinking about sending my 9 year old son to the Merrimack
>>>    Valley Hebrew Academy in Lowell Massachusetts. 
    
    
>>>	Anyway getting back to the Merrimack Valley Hebrew Academy,
>>>    my questions are as follows:
    
>>>    	How do you think my son who doesn't even know what a Torah is
>>>    will fit into a class that has been reading and studying the Torah
>>>    for 3 years? About the only way to tell that my son is a Jew is
>>>    to pull his pants down.
>>>    	The Rabbi told me that learning to read Hebrew was only a technical
>>>    disability on my sons part and that in about 3 months they would
>>>    be able to teach him how to read Hebrew. Any thoughts on this?
>>>
>>>    	I was brought up Orthodox in a kosher home and my mother lit
>>>    the candles every Friday and we celebrated the Jewish holidays and
>>>    I miss all of that. I want my son to be exposed to Jewish traditions
>>>    and experience that which I had as a youth.

    
This could be difficult, or it could be easy, depending upon you and your
son's aptitude and attitude.  We (I have two kids in MVHA and I'm on the
board of directors) have some kids in the school who have started "late"
and done well; there have been others who have been uncomfortable and left.
My daughter started MVHA in the second grade; she's "LD" and she does ok 
there...

MVHA does make it a point to give as much personalized help and tutoring
as possible in student's weak points.  There are several tecahers who
are GOOD, sensitive  Hebrew teachers there. And the kids are
supportive. [We have three Israeli kids in the school this year.
They started out speaking zero English.  They've been kind of "adopted",
and they're all beginning to learn good English.  Most of it's not
from class!]

Your son is 9, i. e., third grade, and you correctly point out that
the other 3rd graders have been learning for three years.  Your son
may not overcome that deficit in 3 months. We have had students who 
did. Your son could. But "so what" if it takes a year?
The only way you will find out about the Hebrew issue is to try it - soon.
It will not get better, in the passage of time, by itself.

The school has emphasis on traditional Jewish values.  To me, it's a difficulty
for your kid to learn about kashrus in his Judaica class, 
then come home and eat lobster.  In general, if your own home 
life is somewhat "anti" to Jewish values,
such as Torah, Shabbat, Kashrut, etc., there may well be a mismatch.
If you are ambivalent, there's a chance of success.  If you are supportive
(though not necessarily observant), then there's a good chance for
success. From what you said above, it sounds like there's a pretty good
chance of success.

>>>    	I will be able to drive him to school because the school is
>>>    on my way to work. He will be able to get a ride home with a mother
>>>    of another student in his class or my wife can pick him up.

There are a number of car pools, and a couple of van pools. There are
a number of kids out on the west side of Chelmsford, but I just don't
remember any  in Shirley. A few kids also stay at some parent's houses in the
afternoon for a while, by individual arrangement. This can get worked out....

>>>    	The total tuition is about $2,000.00 per year which is a little
>>>    steep for my budget. Does anyone know of any tuition assistance
>>>    or scholarships available for a parochial school. How about the CJP
>>>    (Combined Jewish Philanthropists) to whom I have contributed through
>>>    the years.

Get ready for a shock!  Our tuition is, by actual survey, far and away
LOWER than any other Hebrew Day School in New England.  Our actual
COST per student is around $3500 per year.  Check out the Shechter
schools...their tuition is well in excess of $3000.

We do have some tuition assistance.  No one is turned away for financial
reasons.  We have one or two studens who attend "free", due to quite
severe financial problems/limitations of their parents.  But we do have
a sizeable deficit, and we're trying to build a permanent school building.
We adopted a policy on this; it involves discussion/disclosure with the
Tuition committee.  After research, we adopted the same policy as a 
number of other schools use.

We're getting some "assistance" from CJP -- I think it's about $1000 per year.
(Our budget is close to $250,000). Hah.

>>>
>>>    	I really hope to hear all sides of the issue of parochial vs public
>>>    and Orthodox vs Conservative vs Reformed.

The school is definitely "MVHA". It used to be the Montefiore Synagogue
Day School (Orthodox).  It is a different organization, today.

It is intended to be a Day School in the Merrimack
Valley for Jewish children. Not "Orthodox" or "Conservative" or "Reform"
kids -- "Jewish" kids.  We have all in the school.

We send the kids to the school for a variety of reasons.  Perhaps the
most important:

	0) Individualized attention and small classes.  Discipline is
	   enforceable.  Secular education is easily the equal or better
	   of public schools.

	1) Public schools cannot explicitly teach ethical values.  We 
	   have strong orientation to Jewish values.  I want my 
	   children to learn them.

	   Judaism is NOT something that kids generally make up their
	   mind "to do" at 18.  There has to be a substantial, positive
	   background.

	   I went to an afternoon "Conservative" Hebrew school as a kid.
	   I spent many years associated with one here in New England.
	   Flame:  they don't work, if what you want to impart is real
	   Jewish values. The kids DO do well in spitball making.
	   The babysitting value is mediocre.

	2) Public schools do, _in fact_ teach some sets of ethical values:
	   Christianity, drugs, alcohol, Rambo, truancy, lack of respect,
	   TV, "I don't care" attitudes, etc.

	   We don't like that. And burying our heads in the sand doesn't
	   fix it.

Hope this helps.

/don feinberg

    	I am mostly in violent agreement with Don in .1.
    
    	I went to an Orthodox day school through third grade, and I
    believe that I got at least 90% of my Jewish education in those
    few years.  After that I went the afternoon/Sunday route, and it
    was essentially worthless.  In fact, we live in Newton, which has
    good public schools, but we are considering the Schechter school
    to make sure our kid(s) (it's not plural yet, but...) get a real
    Jewish education.  Also, selfishly, I don't like the idea of having
    to be home every Sunday during the school year.
    
    	It will be an issue if what the school teaches is totally at
    odds with your home practice.  However, you  don't sound turned off
    by traditional practices, and you might welcome the chance to resume
    some of them.  Your son is probably old enough that you can benefit
    from discussing and working out these differences.
    
    	I agree with Don that however long it takes your son to catch
    up in Hebrew, it will stand him in good stead for the rest of his
    life.  If the school is flexible, and it sounds as if it is, they
    can place him in the proper classes.
    
    	Wow, $2K sounds hyper-cheap.  The Schechter school starts at
    $3600 for kindergarten and goes up to over $4K for higher grades.

    	Please keep us posted on how your thinking progresses, what
    you decide, and how it works out.
    
    			David

    My brother in Mequon (Wisconsin) pulled his eldest out of public
    school and started her at Hillel Academy ( a Day School) when she
    was eight.  It took her a year or so to catch up... but she is doing
    very well now--as are her younger brother and sister.  I also agree
    with David and Don.  It's important to expose your chlid(ren) to
    Judaism early to give them the tools to make their choices later
    in life.  One can't expect teens with only a "David and Goliath"
    understanding of Judaism to be able to counter the "cultural"
    influences of which Don writes.
    
    BTW--I'm on the board of a day school in Brookline called TORAH
    ACADEMY.  Our tuition starts at $2200 but there are discounts if
    you send more than one child (e.g. three for $5500).  I'm also on
    the financial aid committee and can assure you that we did not turn
    anyone away because they were _unable_ to pay.  

    ---Av
    

    Re. .3:
    
    Which day school is the Torah Academy? Is that the one started by
    Meir Horowitz?
    
    Though I'm not a Bostonian I spent my four years of high school
    at Maimonides.
    
    Cb.

    
>>    Which day school is the Torah Academy? Is that the one started by
>>    Meir Horowitz?
    
	It's the school associated with Beth Pinchas, i. e., the
	Bostoner Rebbe's shul.

	I'm not sure if the Rebbe is the same Horowitz...

/dlf

    Torah Academy was previously known as Gan Torah.  It was started
    five years ago by seven families in Brookline and included Reb Meyer
    Horowitz and his wife as one of the families.  Torah Academy IS
    NOT officially associated with Beth Pinchas.  Many of the families
    who send their children do daven there... but some also daven at Chai Adom,
    the Talner (Beth David), Young Israel, and Miamonides (there is
    even a family from Sharon). There is significant support from the
    Rebbe and his community for the school and thus it is thought of
    as "the Rebbe's school".
    
    I have been President of the board for the past four years and can
    assure you all that it is the board that decides issues---answers
    are not dictated from other sources.
    
    BTW-we now have 90 children in school from Nursery to third grade.
    
    
    PS-re.6-- he has mellowe.; he no longer runs the travel agency,
    and he is in Israel ~4months out of the year at Givat Pinchas--the
    Bostoner Schul in Har Nof.
    
    ---Av
    
   

    
    

    Re. .6:
    
    I beg your pardon. 
    
    Who do you think you are?
    
    Who asked you anything about anybody's personality, merits, or lineage.
    
    I believe an apology is in order.
    
    Cb.
    

I'd also like to second what Don answered in .1.  We have a child in 
his second year of pre-Kindergarten at MHVA.  He, and we, love the school
and its warm atmosphere.  My wife, who has a degree in education, says that
"the school is run by a competent, organized, caring group of educators."

Why not stop by to speak with the principal and to observe a class?

By the way, if you need something geographically closer, there is a
Solomon Shechter school in Worcester.

    If you are going to consider Worcester, I would definitely
    recommend Yeshiva Academy on Newton St. My daughter is in the
    second grade there and I am very pleased with the school's
    performance. 
    
    			Fred 

	Well I did it. I enrolled my son in the MVHA. Don Feinberg gets
    most of the credit ( private joke ) because of what he said in answer
    to my query. MVHA is on my way to work and Worcester would be in
    the opposite direction.
    

    Ok, I'm going to ask a dumb question: do these schools take
    non-Jewish kids the way Catholic schools sometimes do?
    I'm asking this because I may someday have a child, and
    I hear the local Nashua public schools are not great, and
    given a Catholic/Jewish choice, I'd prefer Jewish.
    
    		-John Bishop

reply to: < Note 237.12 by MINAR::BISHOP >
>>>                     -< Sounds like a good place, but... >-
>>>
>>>    Ok, I'm going to ask a dumb question: 

	It's *NOT* a dumb question....


>>>    do these schools take
>>>    non-Jewish kids the way Catholic schools sometimes do?
>>>    I'm asking this because I may someday have a child, and
>>>    I hear the local Nashua public schools are not great, and
>>>    given a Catholic/Jewish choice, I'd prefer Jewish.
    

	MVHA does not discriminate.  We would take a non-Jewish
	child.  In fact, that's happened!

	The question is not "MVHA", really.  The question is "you and
	your child".

	MVHA is very definitely Jewish-ly oriented.  Three-eighths of the
	day is spend in Hebrew language, Chumash (Torah studies),
	Halacha (Jewish law), and Tefilla (prayers and learning about prayers).
	It seems to me that this would be "heavy" for a non-Jewish
	child. And it's hard for me to believe how a non-Jewish child 
	could be "excused" from this, both from the point of potential
	"ostracism" by other children (yeah, well, our children are
	still normal children), but also that school "programs", i. e., 
	shows for parents, etc., tend to revolve about Jewish holidays 
	and observances. It may be that a non-Jewish family would be 
	uncomfortable with these.

	Traditional Judaism has its own set of biases. Judaism is much more
	than a religion. It's a way of life; a philisophy; ethics;
	ways of looking at and thinking about G-d, people and things. It seems 
	to me that a non-Jewish child would potentially be uncomfortable
	for some of these reasons.

    Thank you: one of the things I wanted to know was the relative
    proportions of time spent on Jewish and on secular subjects.
    
    				-John Bishop