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Title: | Sports Memorabilia |
Notice: | Wanted: 3.*; For_sale: 4.*; Traded: 5.* |
Moderator: | SCHOOL::KOPACKO |
|
Created: | Wed Aug 27 1986 |
Last Modified: | Thu May 08 1997 |
Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
Number of topics: | 730 |
Total number of notes: | 8547 |
389.0. "Card-A-Holics Anonymous" by HANNAH::BOONE () Thu Feb 06 1992 15:13
mailed to me from an anonymous friend's wife!
To: HANNAH::BOONE
CC:
Subj: We want you!
You have been referred to us by someone close to you, someone who
wants to see you get better, someone who cares.
If you answer yes to any of the five following questions,
WE CAN HELP!!!!
o Do you spend Saturdays in stinky high school gyms, scrounging around
table tops for hockey cards?
o Do you speak across state lines to other card-aholics like yourself?
o Do you root for teams you don't like just because you have one of
the player's cards?
o Do you worry about the moisture and temperature in certain rooms of
your house, not because of people-comfort, but out of worry
about curling corners?
o Do you secretly wish for Magic Johnson's early demise because you need
cash?
o Do you spend money on cards that should go toward feeding your
child or cat?
WE CAN HELP YOU!!
We will save you from yourself. We can help you restore a family
structure within your home. We will be there for you.
Our approach is simple, we watch you like a hawk. You will be
teamed with a Card-a-Holics Anonymous support member who will follow you
everywhere you go. If you attempt to drive into some hotel where a card
show is happening in the lobby, he will rear end you - putting your car out
of commission. If you try to call one of those "desperately-seeking-Meiken"
phone numbers, he will rip the phone cord of the wall. He will save you from
yourself.
We succeed, because, not only am I the Card-a-Holics Anonymous
president, I'm one of their clients.
signed,
IM. A. NOGOODLOUTWHOPUTSCARDSBEFOREMYFAMILY
T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
---|
389.1 | ???Poor Taste??? | OTOU01::WARK | No one here gets out alive | Tue Feb 11 1992 09:06 | 4 |
| Just for the record, Mr. Moderator, I find the previous note in
extremely poor taste.
Bill
|
389.3 | | ROYALT::ASHE | Buxom x-dressers threw fake gold coins at our feet | Tue Feb 11 1992 10:01 | 1 |
| Or maybe it hits too close to home...
|
389.4 | for what it's worth | DONVAN::GIZMOP::R_PLOURDE | | Tue Feb 11 1992 11:52 | 8 |
| I thought it was funny and I was not offended in any way by it.
I like to voice my vote too
Ron
|
389.5 | | BSS::G_MCINTOSH | We have always been among you! | Wed Feb 12 1992 00:46 | 3 |
| I'm not offended either. It was amusing.
Glenn
|