Conference rocks::weight_control

Virginia,

Sure is he** being normal, huh?  I'm in a similar boat, having regained
about 9 of the 30 pounds I have lost.  I believe I'm now back on track
and will tell you what I've done.  

First, I joined a low-impact, beginner aroebics class at the Y.  I've 
been once so far and it seems perfect for me.  No jumping around, 
no push-ups, just easy get-the-heart-beating stuff. I don't particularly 
like to "exercise", but until it's light enough in the evening to walk 
after dinner I really needed to do something.  It makes me feel like I'm
treating myself.
    
The next thing I have done is that I finally got out my "measurement diary"
again and took all my measurements and wrote them down.  Then I have a 
baselevel to compare with after a few weeks.

Finally, I changed my breakfast menue.  I tend to get real stuck on a
particular breakfast.  Not that that's bad, it's just that sometimes I 
think a change is good for me.  So, for  a few months it will be 1/2 
grapefruit, 3/4 oz. cereal with 1/2 C skim milk and coffee.  (In the past
it's been 1/3 C cottage cheese with 1/2 C mandarin oranges or pineapple
and 2 slices of lite bread.  Has also been 2 rice cakes with 1T peanut
butter and a WW yogurt.)

I still need to go to the mall at lunchtime and try on new spring
clothes (won't buy them until they go on sale!).

Keep refusing to by them bigger!!!!!  Keep the belief that you WILL
decide to lose weight again.

I think one reason I have backslid is that this time when I joined WW I
committed that it would be the LAST time.  I now have to face what that
means when I reach goal.  There is a great longing to be able to eat
6 doughnuts a day and not have to worry.  That will never happen.  Old
habits and loves die hard.

liz

    I've been reading this notes file for some time now, and although
    I relate to everyone, I've been too shy to add my two cents, or
    to reach out for some support as well.  Well, this topic is one
    near and dear to my heart, because for years I have been joining
    diet groups, losing my weight, feeling terrific and then gaining
    part of it back and having the cycle begin again (the classic yo-yo
    dieter...)  My motivation depends on my state of mind, which depends
    on my weight!  So, all you successful "mainteners", how do you keep
    it off, and I don't mean, "what do you eat", but how do you stay
    motivated to not give in and eat junk for lunch, and then figure
    you've blown it already so have more junk for dinner...?
    
    What's happened to me is that I lost 25 lbs at Diet Center, when
    I really wanted to lose 35 lbs, because I want to weigh 110 lbs.!
    (I'm 5'1") But I stopped after 25, partially because it got too
    expensive...  I've maintained for about a month, but it was my birthday
    on Tuesday, and I feel like that caused me to lose control and
    motivation.  (I've been eating cake, candy etc.)  I decided to add
    this note and reach out to all of you because for lunch today I
    ate 2 candy bars and a bag of pretzels for lunch!!!  I do not want
    to do this to myself!  So, any words of wisdom?
    
    Liz
    

Liz, try _Fat is a Feminist Issue_ by Susie Orbach.  It deals with eating that 
is not done for hunger. One of the most interesting things I've learned is that 
compulsive eaters usually also compulsively diet, too, and get a really bad 
case of the "guilts".  Anyway, might be worth checking in to.

Meredith

Liz in .2, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!  Many, many times I reach for the candy
bar then figure I ate one, why not 5.  Seriously, I don't believe I
could eat enough to make myself sick because I dont 'think there's
enough chocolate in the world (though I'd love to try...).  I also
don't believe there's anything "wrong" with making less-than-appropriate
choices about what to eat now and again.  I put "wrong" in quotes 
because I sincerely don't believe that weightloss is a right-or-wrong
game.  Wrong implies bad, and deviating from your plan is not (IMHO)
bad, it is simply less appropriate.  If you do really want something
like candy, have a little.  Otherwise you'll eat around it and still
not be satisfied.  Then you'll have consumed many times over the number
of extra calories than you might have if you had gone ahead and eaten
what you wanted.

Sorry to go off on a tangent there.  Back to motivation.  I'm not certain
what keeps a person at-goal motivated because I haven't let myself get
there yet.  However, it might help if you have some "before" pictures
of yourself.  Carry them around and SHOW THEM to people, especially those
who didn't know you then.  I carry one around that was of me at about 
175-180 (I'm at 150 now).  It helps me stay on track.  Another thing
that is critical and I expect to remain critical in my case is group
support.  I cannot do it on my own and I recognize that.  I will continue
to go to WW after I reach goal in order to help me maintain.  There was
a good letter in the recent WW magazine where a person at goal wrote to
say that her current meeting members put her down because they don't see
her as someone who needs to be there.  Afterall, she's not "fat" anymore.
She didn't know how to handle this.  The answer was that she should consider
starting off with giving a brief history of her weight when she started,
her length of time it took to reach goal, and her need for continuing 
support.  If you're in a similar situation where people who never knew
you as overweight, you might want to consider that.  This strategy will
also serve to reinforce your own feeling of accomplishment.

It is tough, people notice when you're losing, but how do you get them
to notice that every week you still weigh the same as the other week?!

If throughout your losing process you treated yourself, continue to do
so.  Instead of a reward for every 10 pounds, make it a reward for every
x number of weeks that you stayed at your goal.  Continue to treat yourself
as the special person that you are and that you were when what you were doing
was more visible (losing the weight, that is).  Remember, too, that you
are a valuable member of this conference who is helping provide motivation
and ideas to others.

I hope some of this helps, and I"m looking forward to everyone's ideas, too.

Liz

    Thank you, thank you for your thoughts about motivation!  After
    reading Liz's reply in .4, I called a woman who was involved in
    setting up a ww at work program.  She told me that today is only
    the second meeting, and it's not too late to get involved.  So,
    today at 12:00 I'll be doing something really good for myself. 
    I am planning to pick up the book "Fat is a feminist issue" and
    really try be aware of WHY I eat.  So, now I can say that I'm trying
    to stay motivated by participating in this conference, and reaching
    out to people who are having the same sorts of problems that I am.
     It really does help to know that I'm not alone!  How do you stay
    motivated, successful maintainers?
    
    Liz  

TRACTR::LINDNER
    
    This is the first time I've ever written in the notes file.  I
    am nearing the end of my dieting.  I have been on this diet 
    since September.  I have lost about 30 pounds.  I have been 
    gaining and losing weight for a number of years, and everytime
    I gain the weight back I always gain a little bit more.  I 
    recently read a book.."The Hilton Head Diet".  I decided to try
    it.  I have to say that I did not get the urges for sweets that
    I normally get when I diet.  I've been on Weight Watchers and
    lost the weight, but went right back up again.  So I know the
    hardest battle is yet to come.  Maintaining the weight.

    Hi,
    
    I am a classic yo-yo dieter also.  I recently put on about 15 
    extra lbs. since Christmas.  (Christmas + a week in Jamaica = FAT).
    
    Well, here I am again trying to diet and stay motivated.  Walking
    helps keeping me motivated...I think about how firm my thighs are
    going to look and how good I'm going to look in the summer.
    
    I also buy alot of health and beauty books from used book stores
    and look for good motivational tips from them.
    
    I recently taped Sports Illustrated's Swimsuit video...just looking
    at those girls in their skimpy bathing suits motivates me - I figure
    if they can look good - why can't I?                
    
    We'll see....
    
    Nancy
                                                               

    Okay, here goes... I don't know how many of you remember me, my
    name is Kim, and I haven't written to this conference since September
    of 87.  I had lost 20+ pounds the last time I wrote in.  Since that
    time I regained 10 of those 20, then I got pregnant with my son,
    (a constant joy in my life, that's another topic).  I gained 30
    more pounds when I was pregnant, lost 30, gained 10, and here I
    am again.  Back where I was in June of 87' at 160 lbs with not even
    my son to blame for it (as I lost all that weight, and gained it
    back).  So I am once again writing to this conference for all the
    wonderful support I received the last time.  I started my diet on
    Monday, and have been going strong all week...the weekend is coming,
    but with that weigh-in on Monday morning I'm just sure I can hold
    my own.  The caring people in this notesfile are my only source
    of support, my husband weighs 148lbs soaking wet and has for the
    10 years I've known him...just can not comprehend what it is to
    have to relearn how to eat...as he eats anything he wants, with
    no penalty.  Anyway I just wanted to let you all know I was back,
    and that I am logging in to read the file, it really does help alot.
    
    Kim      

    I been out of touch with this notes file for a while but first
    I would like to say congratulation to Joel Jaffe.  Since I have
    read about his weightloss, I have become motivated to loose the
    rest of my weight.  Reading this notesfile is one way that I stay
    motivated.  But everyday I do Power talking as an attempt to reprogram
    my mind.  I wake up in the morning and I tell myself outloud that
    I am strong, healthy and happy.  I also use images and words to visualize
    what I would look like with 60 lbs gone.   I use the following script
    to do power talking in the moring before I eat breakfeast.   I have
    found that if I read it a loud 4 times it sticks with me all day.
    
    "Today is going to be a great day.  I feel confident, happy and
    relaxed.  I know that I'am going to lose weight today.  Nothing or
    nobody will keep me from accomplishing my goal.  I will stick to my
    diet.  I will eat small portions of food for breakfast, lunch and
    dinner; I am confident that these portions will satisfy me.  I realize
    each successful day  will bring me closer and closer to my goal of
    60 pounds.  I know that I can do anything once I put my mind to it.
    Losing this weight will make me happier, healthier and more attractive.
    I am taking control of my life.  My confidence is growing, and I am a
    success."  {reprinted with out permission from Men's Fitness}.
    
    I also use Men's Fitness as a motivational and exercise tool.
    
    -marc

    O.K. Marc,
    
    Welcome to the club. Knowing your strength professionally has me
    convinced that you can meet your goals. I derive a lot of my motivation
    from this notes file. I find that the practice of putting down my
    feelings in print for the whole world to see reinforces my own internal
    strength. I still have the occasional slip, that ingestion of food
    not planned for and eaten by the unhealthy side of me who is out
    of control, but more and more, the healthy controlled side is winning.
    I can now allow myself some "goodies" (the plan allows for 1 baked
    potatoe) but it is always eaten under control. I am sure you and
    the other long timers know what I am saying.
    
    Anyway, Stay in touch - let us know how you are doing frequently.
    
    Joel

    I found a new motivation for me.
    
    I just started -- again -- on a liquid fast, with a small salad
    allowed as needed.
    
    My wonderful 2-1/2 year old daughter, Maresa, watches me making
    my "shake" in the morning and says, "Mommy get skinny?"  I say,
    "Yes, Mommy's getting skinny." Then, whenever I tell her that
    she's perfect, she tells me "you're too fat, but just a little
    bit." (Yes, she heard it from me first.)
    
    With all this support from her, how could I not ask for her help?
    
    So I taught her to tell me not to eat certain foods: pizza, candy,
    chocolate, tacos, chips.
    
    Now she says (pointing her finger at me):
    
    	"Don't eat (whatever), Mommy, you'll get fat!"
    
    At work, all I have to do is picture her saying that to me; it's
    a great smile, and it's working.
    
    If that's not motivation, I don't know what is!
    
    
    Catherine
    
                             

    Catherine,
    
    Want to lend out your daughter?  Sounds like just the ticket.