| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 377.1 | be prepared.. | MILPND::CLARK_D | | Fri Jan 19 1996 12:55 | 18 |
|
Cheryl,
I asked a lawyer about this since I'm in that position. My husband
died 7 years ago. My daughter was 6 at the time, I was very concerned
what would happen to her if anything (God forbid) happened to me. I
wrote up a will at that time stating who I wanted custody to go to
should something happen.
I got remarried this past year and wondered again (I'm a worrier about
these things) My lawyer said my husband (her stepdad) had no real
legal power with her and I would have to state in my will that I wanted
Custody/Guardinship to go to her Stepdad which is what she also wants.
Either family can fight for custody so you should have something in
writing set up. My lawyer strongly suggested me doing this long ago.
Dianne
|
| 377.2 | also a worrier | QUOKKA::29169::SMITH | | Fri Jan 19 1996 13:40 | 9 |
| This was something I was concerned about as in a will. My Ex husband
has not paid support for several years and is not financially well.
He sees the children regularly and if I should die I expect they would
probably go to live with him. Without a will, would he be able to get
his hands on any inheritance (My half of my home, possestions,
insurance) by saying he needs the 'support' money for the kids?
Could this put my present husband in a bind?
Sharon
|
| 377.3 | Life Insurance? | QUOKKA::38642::PEASLEE | | Fri Jan 19 1996 13:52 | 5 |
| Re: .2, I would assume that you would have life insurance with your
children as beneficiaries so that the children would be provided for.
Wouldn't you?
nmp
|
| 377.4 | Yes, but... | QUOKKA::29169::SMITH | | Fri Jan 19 1996 14:36 | 8 |
| Yes, but they would not get it if he touched it. He would drink it,
gamble it, and blow it on frivolous toys. They both work, so they
would more likely be taking care of him (since he doesn't), not the
other way around. The Life insurance would be for their college.
Perhaps I should have my sister in control of their college money
somehow.
Sharon
|
| 377.5 | | QUOKKA::24661::DEWITT | some promises never should be spoken | Mon Jan 22 1996 06:50 | 10 |
| Sharon
Appoint a trustee (family member or lawyer) that you can trust and
you know will handle the fiscal responsibility towards your children.
You could either keep the children as beneficiaries or make the
trustee the beneficiary with the legal paperwork to back up the
insurance proceeds are for the children's benefit only.
Joyce
|
| 377.6 | 2 cents | MKOTS3::RAUH | I survived the Cruel Spa | Mon Jan 22 1996 07:52 | 7 |
| Bio-dad gets first dibs in custodial disputes, step dad gets
visitations. The longer the child lives with step dad, the greater the
chances that the bio father gets less of a shot at custody. Best is
that ALL parties sit down and chew on the thoughts before you go off
and make plans. Children at the age of 12/13 get the real chance to
choose. If bio-father is the dredge of the earth type, he gets less of
a shot at custody.
|
| 377.7 | | TARKIN::VAILLANCOURT | | Mon Jan 22 1996 07:52 | 22 |
| My lawyer made me remove my child as my beneficiary. Until they're
18, the money from your life insurance will not go directly to them,
even if they're named as a beneficiary.
He had me change my beneficiary so that my ex- husband got a certain
percent, and the rest went to a family member of my choice, as
trustee for my son (I chose my sister). The purpose of giving money to
the ex-, is so that if I die, he'll have money to help the cost of
raising our son (he had to do the same with his insurance, as part of the
divorce decree). The rest of the policy which goes to my sister is to
cover funeral expenses, and money for my son when he's older.
I understand all the financial aspects, I just don't understand the
custody/living/etc. I know my ex- would want full custody of our
son. We're amicable now, he gives me all the support he's supposed
to faithfully, sees our son regularly, etc. But I know if I weren't
here he would not want to share our son with another 'man', even if
it were our son's step-dad.
Cheri
|