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Conference quokka::non_custodial_parents

Title:Welcome to the Non-Custodial Parents Conference
Notice:Please read 1.* before writing anything
Moderator:MIASYS::HETRICK
Created:Sun Feb 25 1990
Last Modified:Fri Jun 06 1997
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:420
Total number of notes:4370

331.0. "What do you do on holidays ?" by EDWIN::FINAN (Tim Finan, MKO2-2/B3, DTN 264-1229) Tue Nov 08 1994 12:07

I applogize if this topic has already been covered, but I
could not find an appropriate note.
 
I was wondering what kind of arrangements you all make
for seeing  your kids on Christmas. My ex wants to have our
daughter on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, and for
me to have her Christmas Afternoon and night. She wants this
to be the case *every* year. I want to alternate years, doing
it her way one year, and the opposite the next year.

I am not looking for arguments one way or the other, I just 
want to know what arrangements other people have.

Thanks,
	Tim
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
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331.1My Holiday5950::MAYALLTue Nov 08 1994 12:2218
    
    I have my daughter, every Christmas from 4PM until the following
    day at 6PM.  I always have my daughter the weekend before Christmas.
    This is when my family has always gotten together.  I don't get her
    Christmas Eve or Christmas morning.  The weekend before Christmas is
    within the divorce decree.  Based on all the crap that goes
    on this has worked out well.  I don't jerk my daughter out of the
    house on Christmas eve for a short visit.  She has always been prepared
    and thrilled to see me Christmas afternoon.  All in all it has worked
    out well.  
    
    My ex wouldn't budge on the Christmas Holiday.  We alternate the
    Thanksgiving Holiday.  
    
    Good luck Tim.
    
    Mark
             
331.2AIMHI::RAUHI survived the Cruel SpaTue Nov 08 1994 13:286
    I alt with Thanksgiving and Christmas. And I always have her on New
    Years. And that doesnt bother me cause, when she gets older, I can have
    some fun with her making fun as I did when I was a teen. I dont like
    going out on New Years as I use to do.
    
    
331.3Kids with me on Christmass eveSALEM::PERRY_WWed Nov 09 1994 04:207
    We agreed that the children are with me Christmass eve and stay
    overnight and early on Christmass day I take them to her moms house
    approx 1-1/2 hr drive away.  we've stuck with that for seven years now
    and seems to work.  The children spend Thanksgiving with their mom and
    I always get invited which is very considerate of her. If either of us
    ever remarry things may change but now they seem to work pretty well.
                                                Bill Perry
331.4No set rules, what easiest for both of us.CSCMA::SMITHMon Nov 14 1994 11:4711
    Since my big "family Christmas" is always the weekend before xmas, my 
    ex usually gets them on Christmas, and we celebrate with them just before 
    they go.
    I usually get them every other Thanksgiving, but it's hard to keep
    track, we just play it by hear.  But now that he's moved out of state to 
    avoid child support, who knows?  It seems he's forgot they're alive, out
    of site, out of mind.
    
    Sharon
    
    
331.5Alternate each yearFOUNDR::SHEEHANMon Nov 14 1994 13:1513

 We alternate each year! On Even numbered years our 2 daughters are with
 their Mom Christmas Eve through noon on Christmas Day and with me thru
 the following day and vise versa on the Odd numbered years. Since we have
 Joint Physical Custody and split the week/alternate weekends it sometimes
 causes some schedule juggling especially when Christmas falls on a weekend
 but so far there have been no complaints by our children. Of course they
 think its great that Santa leaves gifts at both houses and can't wait to
 see whats waiting for them at the other parents home.


 Neil...
331.6AIMHI::RAUHI survived the Cruel SpaMon Nov 14 1994 13:327
    One thing that someone has written to me about off line is keeping a
    calander of weekends whom gets what or whom.:)
    
    They are important to keep. And follow. There is less heart burn, and
    spending of stocking money for attornies also!:) 
    
    I cannot believe that some folks don't have one or keep one.
331.7CSC32::HADDOCKSaddle RozinanteMon Nov 14 1994 16:0511
    
    We were to alternate Christmases and Easter each year.  Problem was
    that, for example, Christmas 93 and Easter 94 would cause one parent
    to have them basically for both events each year.  It was rather 
    interesting when my ex tried to deny me the kids because _she_ thought 
    the court had made a mistake :^}.

    Also she lived out of state and made short-term trade of weekend and
    Christmas more difficult.

    fred();
331.8Christmas on 12/24NCMAIL::HANSHAWLThu Dec 01 1994 14:369
    We celebrate our Christmas the day before.  Santa comes to
    our house the night of the 23rd and the morning of the 24th 
    is our Christmas.  This has worked out well for us as the
    kids are with us all day long.  This has been our tradition
    for the past 9 years.
    
    Good Luck.
    Linda