Conference quokka::non_custodial_parents

    Suggestion:
    
    Write a motion to shoot the ex. :-)
    
    Write a motion to shoot the ex's attorney
    
    Write a motion to shoot the judge/marital master.
    
    Write a motion to shoot all of the above in a random order. :-)
    

It never hurts to ask, but the answer will most likely 'go ^%&^#$@$ your self'.
They either want the children for the monthly pay check or there is a real
desire to have the children for the right reasons. Just like your self, you want
the children too, but don't mind not having to fork out the pay check either.

Sometimes your ex has had enough and may be more than glad to hand them over,
but either way, make sure it is done with the proper legal paper to avoid future
problems. If not, then it's the courts or nothing.

    Your best bet will be to try and convice your ex. For you to obtain
    primary custody you have to show that your children's well-being is in
    jeopardy. This is not easy. The courts won't move them unless there is
    a good reason.  At some point the children themselves can testify in
    court if they desire to live at your house. My attorney said this age
    is between 9-14 YO. The actual age depends on the child. If you get one
    and not all; your still paying ;-( (maybe less but still paying)
    
    But, since you live so close you may be able to get the court to grant
    a more liberal visitation schedule. One week your house one week hers
    or something along those lines.
    
    I considered going for custody and my attorney gave me the same advise
    that I am giving you. (I think I paid $100.00 for it though) I'll send you
    mail and tell you where to send my check!!!! ;-)
    
    Jeff

    
    Too bad your not in Boulder County, they really do look out
    for the children much better than El Paso.
    
    Joan
    

    This is probably as good a place to put this so here goes.
    
    My Support payments for my children is due to end the 21 of this month!
    Well not to be undone my ex decides she still wants to nail me.
    
    Throughout the 15years we have been divorced she has constantly dragged
    me into court for more support, and what ever charges she can think of.
    
    I take my children very seriously and have always spent as much time
    with them as possible.
    
    This woman does not need the support as she is very well off and Loves
    to spend money, those who now me, and her can attest to this creature.
    
    Now I receive a summons in the mail to appear in court on contempt
    charges, along with demand that I pay for my sons college.
    
    My son is going to college?
    
    Contempt because I didn't pay for my daughters??  She quit school!!
    
    Well I was working out of State with an external customer so I sent
    along a letter to the court informing them of same..
    
    This was July 14.. all quiet, I even ran around the courts Thursday
    getting support payment issued fixed?
    
    Fridy I have a note stuck in my door from the Shiff that he has an
    un-bailable warrent for my arrest, and if arrested I will be in Jail
    until Monday..Give him a call.
    
    Beautiful.. So I call him, his office, his car, his secretary tells me
    he won't be back until Monday..
    
    Now what??
    
    Cal

    
    I didn't think there was such a thing as an "un-bailable" warrent.
    The best thing to do now is lay low until Monday, then try to 
    get this mess straightened out.  Which is probably what you've done
    if you're around to read this.
    
    For contempt, that have to prove *intent* on your part.  Ie
    you were capable of complying, you knew you should be complying,
    and you deliberately chose not to comply.
    
    fred();
    

    Well had a very interesting day yesterday!
    
    I did contact the Court who told me that yes there was a bench warrent
    handed down and that I had to go to the Clerk Magistrate to have it
    cleared.
    
    I also called the Sheriff who thanked me for calling and asked when I
    could come in.
    
    So Yesterday I went to Worcester, met with the Sheriff, filled out some
    statements, To the best of my knowledge, and went to the court.
    
    Well the ex was also called in to Court. It took her over two hours to
    get there, and it's a 30 minute drive.
    
    We finally get to sit with Family Services.  The contempt she claimed
    was for 1987.  She claimed I owed for my daughters education, Huh?? My
    daughter dropped out of school!
    
    She forgot to mention that.  The she give the reviwer a bill for legal
    services from 1987 along with another for having to pay for the warrant
    and proposed school costs.
    
    By this time Family Services is pretty aggravated that she is using the
    courts for her personal vendettas. 
    
    He tries to settle this, but no she wants to see the judge.
    
    So into the court we go, and wait, and wait.. Finally our case is
    called.
    
    If any of you remember Judge McMannus, you'll be happy to know that
    Judge Moynihan is completely opposite. He listens very intently to each
    party and is fair.
    
    The Judge threw out her request for 87 legal fees, questioned the
    tuition bill my ex gave him and listened to my side.
    
    He took the case under advisement and will return a decision to us. 
    This is the first time I've left Court feeling at least half human..
    
    Cal

    
    Chuck u still fighting that battle eh
    
    Mine starts SOON !!!
    
    hang in there
    
       C.P.
    

    Ah C. P. 
    
    Welcome to the "Club".
    
    Sigh the woman is still hanging on for that last zing.  
    
    She cold, very cold.. and ..UGLY..!
    
    Cal

    Cal,
    
    Write a motion to shoot the b*tch.:) That will end your problem. :)

    
    I can just see the judge's expression when he gets a motion entitled
    REQUEST TO HAVE PLAINTIFF SHOT
    fred(8^));

    
    re .10
    
    Maybe you just have to fill out the right forms.  Remember the
    old MASH 4077 episode where Hawkeye asked Radar to get him
    (I think it was) $10,000.  A few weeks later Radar brought him
    a pile of cash.  Hawkeye asked him, "How did you do that"?
    Radar replied, "You can get anything from the Army.  You just
    have to fill out the right forms". 
    
    8^) = fred();

    
    Ahh if it only were true!  But with my luck...
    
    As for the Army.. Ha no matter what forms you filled out in triplicate
    you never got a thing.
    
    Cal

    
    Well I received the Judges decision in the mail and he decided that I
    should pay $6000.00, gulp.
    
    So I call the school to get particulars and they quote me an entirly
    different price then the one the ex presented to the courts.
    
    So I follow up with the Finance person at the shcool as well as the
    business manager and they sent me the figures along with confirmation
    that she did in fact receive Financial Aid.. Humm.
    
    After chasing around the courts again I have filed for a re-trial for
    Sept 2nd.
    
    I sent her a registered letter with the summons in addition to mailing. 
    I have the receipt for the registered letter and the fact that I mailed
    an additional letter to her house.
    
    Now we'll see what happens next, any suggestions?
    
    Cal

    The price differnce less than the ex quoted? Saw one of those cases.
    Guy had put aside $60,000 for his daughter to go to college. When it
    was time to go. The ex had spent it, he was unemployed as a contractor,
    and the court and the ex tried to clean his clocks. Welp. He did his
    homework, and the game has reversed. She had told DCYS to collect the
    money for tution, money he had set aside. And this was out of the legal
    relm of DCYS. 

    George,
    
    The difference is almost 4K and she wanted my weekly support payments
    to continue to her to cover "College" Expense,,yeah!
    
    This woman is very well off, remarried and could give a sweet %$&^
    about the kids, she just wants to continue her personal vendetta and
    weekly monies.
    
    I have every intention of helping my children, but will be damned if
    they think I will contribute to her religion, MONEY!
    
    Cal

    
    I'd request purgery charges.
    fred();

    Get a letter head of cost from the college, and with the paperwork in
    hand that you have from the opposing camp. FILE IT asap! Or bring it
    forth to you favorite attorney. Be liberal with cost for fun, clothing,
    books, and etc. Then print up your figures and compair. Throw in a
    vacation to Datona Beach for a spring fling too. I am sure that you
    will be under cut in your cost vs hers.:)
    
    Geo

    
    Well I do have a formal letter from the school along with the letter
    she presented.. and she told the judge that she couldn't get financial
    aid.. hope he remembers!!
    
    I had to go to the sheriffs dept today and have them deliver the
    summons to her.  I will ask the judge for court costs as she refused
    the certified letter.
    
    I really don't expect her to show Sept 2 so I will have her arrested..
    
    Cal

    That will help your side if she doesnt show up. For it shows the court
    an unwilling to work with you and the court systems. And the court
    will not put up with that sort of tomas-foolery.:)

    
    Well I had my day in court and the ex did show up in all her "I'm so
    poor" finery.  I wonder what she did with the Mink coat, very large
    diamond ring and Caddy??
    
    Anyway I had all the information the school had sent me, which was over
    4,000.00 less then what she had originally given the judge.
    
    As I'm presenting the information to the judge he looks at me and says
    "Why didn't I present this at the first trail rather then tying up the
    courts again"?
    
    I tried to tell the judge that I didn't even know my son was going to
    college never mind what the costs were.  Hell I rate going to court
    right up there with Kidney Stone attacks!
    
    She came back with additional costs that she didn't present before,
    like now my son isn't going to live at school, but is going to rent an
    apartment!?
    
    I did my best to remain factual with hopes the judge could see through
    my ex's actual intentions..
    
    He took it under advisement and will return a decision.

    If your son takes an apartment, you want a copy of the lease, address,
    and who is living in that apartment. You can also pention the college
    to find out why he is not taking up in the dorms like all the other
    good first year college students. You should find out if he is going to
    have a car too for college. 

    
    Maybe it's my face..?
    
    I just recieved the Judges decision to my re-trail appeal..  Motion
    denied!
    
    So here I sit totally frustrated with this legal system.  I had all the
    documentation and evidence that my ex was blowing hot air up the judges
    #$#%, and I get nailed.
    
    So time to regroup and see what the next step will be.  
    
    Cal

    
    Cal,
    
    Check on the time limit on filing for change in CS.  There may be
    nothing to stop you from just filing for a new change of the
    CS amount.
    
    May try to get a new judge.  Check to see if this judge is up
    for re-eletion this year.  If he is, take out some advertising
    space in the local papers asking voters to throw him out of office.
    At the _least_ he'll have to withdraw from your case because he
    now has a personal interest in _you_.  The next judge you get
    will know that you are not going to just sit there and take it.
    
    fred();

    re .23
    
    >I just recieved the Judges decision to my re-trail appeal..  Motion
    >denied!
    
    Not surprising,  it's easier to take a steak from a pit bull
    than it is to get a judge to admit he made a mistake.
    
    fred();

    Cal,
    
    	Apeal it! Then make sure that each time you step into the court
    room the court recorder is cranking. And if the apeal is dennied, 
    Rule 7 Supreme court Apeal. Or in Mass, I guess you have an Appalent
    court. Here in N.H. such a place is a dream. Up the antie! I would
    summise you will have to pay for her lawyer too for her to take you
    to court? She is such a poverty stricken soul?:) 
    Stuff down the throat the judges decision by upping the stakes. 
    A judge does not like it when you do such. It makes them have to take
    back some of their blind decisions.