| Title: | Discussions of topics pertaining to men |
| Notice: | Please read all replies to note 1 |
| Moderator: | QUARK::LIONEL E |
| Created: | Thu Jan 21 1993 |
| Last Modified: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
| Last Successful Update: | Fri Jun 06 1997 |
| Number of topics: | 268 |
| Total number of notes: | 12755 |
The following entry has been contributed by a member of our community
who wishes to remain anonymous. If you wish to contact the author by
mail, please send your message to QUARK::MODERATOR, specifying the
conference name and note number. Your message will be forwarded with
your name attached unless you request otherwise.
This entry is also posted in HUMAN_RELATIONS.
Steve
Hi, I'm a woman posting this for a male friend of mine. He doesn't
work for Digital so doesn't have access to the kinds of things that
we do here.
He is on the verge of leaving his wife but is scared to death of the
effect it will have on his children. I suggested to him that maybe he
should find a support group made up of men who have gone through this
already or are in the same situation he is. Men that can help him
through his decision and tell him what's worked for them in handling
their children's feelings as well as their own during the divorce
process and afterwards. Some help in suggesting legal advice for
custody and child support issues would be helpful too. He's not sure
where to find such a thing though and neither am I. I can't even think
of where to start asking. He doesn't believe in counseling (with a
professional) as he's tried it before and it wasn't beneficial to him.
He's looking for a peer group. He's also not looking for someplace
that's going to give him mostly negative feedback. He knows what he
wants and needs to do for his happiness and a better personal future as
he's been unhappy in his marriage for a few years now, but needs to be
sure that he'll be able to still be a good father to his children
despite the fact he's not with them every day. Both of his children
are very young.
Thank you.
| T.R | Title | User | Personal Name | Date | Lines |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 92.1 | cross-post to Non-Custodial_parents | AKOCOA::BBLANCHARD | Wed Oct 13 1993 16:12 | 16 | |
You might want to cross-post this to the Non-Custodial_Parents
notesfile as there is lots of good advice about this type of thing
in that notesfile.
Non_custodial also contains notes about a couple of Fathers groups
located in Mass and NH, these groups are very supportive to someone
who is either contemplating or going through a divorce and has legal
questions about divorce, custody and child support.
One last comment, the best divorce, child custody and child support
arrangements are usually negotiated between the couple, or between
them with a mediator. With luck all can be negotiated peacefully,
which is by far best for the children, the legal system can then
be brought in only to rubber stamp what the parents have agreed to.
-good luck
| |||||
| 92.2 | phone numbers, addresses | SCHOOL::BOBBITT | puts the sparkle in my I | Thu Oct 14 1993 12:27 | 49 |
I recently collected information from the non-custodial-parents
notesfile for a friend of a friend, and post it here as a supplement to
anything else you read in that notesfile - it is chock full of useful
information.
Most of this information is for divorce and custody work, so if he's
looking for support he may find groups through or in these
organizations, but many of them exist to support men further into the
divorce/custody process.
----------------------------------------------------------------
This man was recommended for helping non-custodial parents, and
advising in custody battles: Dr. Maurice Small, 450 Notre Dame Ave.,
Manchester, NH 03104 603-624-6811. Dr. Small has written the book
"men and divorce". Dr. Small offers weekly meetings, and has recently
offered a course called "Men and Divorce: what you don't know will hurt
you".
C.U.R.E. - coalition united for rights enforcement 617-899-1944,
413-736-5697
citizens for divorce reform P.O. Box 620393, Newton, MA 02161
617-237-7074
FERICS laws - fair and equal responsibilities in child support laws
P.O. box 269 738 Main Street Waltham, MA 02254 phone 5-7 p.m.
617-899-1944
Citizens for legal reform 11 cottage road, westboro MA 01581
508-366-2837
DAD - Dads against divorce P.O. Box 914 Sterling, MA 01564
508-422-6774
Concerned Fathers (a support group dedicated to helping people
positively restructure their families after separation. they place
special emphasis on educating the public as to the inequities in the
local family laws, particularly those pertaining to child custody and
financial orders. they have "survival" kits that help prepare for
custody battles.)
Concerned fathers P.O. box 2768, Springfield, MA 01101 413-736-7432,
413-736-5697, 617-455-8810
Fathers United for Equal Justice - 603-889-3922, 603-624-6811
| |||||