| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 1153.1 | Be Brave! | SALISH::HASLAM_BA | Creativity Unlimited | Wed Apr 10 1991 11:54 | 16 |
| If younger men are interested, I would suggest starting the "dating
game" there. Maturity is not as much a matter of age as it is a
willinginess to act responsibly. If these younger men seem reasonably
mature, why not give them a chance? If the men you know are afraid of
your self-confidence and openness, that should send up a read flag right
away. It may mean that they do not have an equal or near equal level
of self-confidence and openness. Do you really want that kind of
person in your life?
When I was in the position of dating again, I simply asked the man ou.
It was unnerving the first few times, but I imagine it's the same for
men who ask women out. Once people realize you are dating again, more
men may start to ask you out.
Best Wishes for future happiness,
Barb
|
| 1153.2 | | XCUSME::HOGGE | Dragon Slaying...No Waiting! | Thu Apr 11 1991 13:22 | 16 |
| Start exploring your interests.
That is, take classes in art if you feel artistically inclined,
Get invovled in volunteer work if you're concerned over various
situations.
If you enjoy hiking... join a hiking club, sooner or later you'll meet
someone interested in the same thing and things will happen.
I've operated like that in the past, and it's always worked, I'm not in
my 40's but if it works for me I'm sure it can work for anyone!
Oh and don't be afraid to try some of those younger guys... maturity
is a matter of life experiences and how a person see's the world....
It has absolutly NOTHING to do with age.
Skip
|
| 1153.3 | | ROYALT::NIKOLOFF | Fearless | Thu Apr 11 1991 14:10 | 16 |
| Great advice, Skip. I *am* in my forties, and have been divorced
for 10 years.. I started by going out with younger guys, it was a wonderful
fun experience. I still go out with younger guys, just not as young as I did
then. I met people going dancing with a co-worker/best friend ("Hi Pete")...8-)
He worked in my building at the time and we wanted a companion just to dance
with(Pete was 26) and be became the very best of friends just by talking about
our opposite sex crushes and new dance steps.
But it all boils down to feeling real good about yourself. I spend time
getting dress to go dancing and do some soul-searching too. So far, I have been
my 'best' friend and it works.
best of luck and be good to you, first, than others will.
;') Mikki
|
| 1153.4 | Pointer | CRISTA::MAYNARD | Big Sister Is Watching | Fri Apr 12 1991 14:09 | 4 |
|
See notesfile Hit::Singles
Jim
|
| 1153.5 | Happy Hunting!! | OTOA01::PICHETTE | | Sat Apr 20 1991 14:28 | 18 |
| I am just going through a seperation, and I find myself asking if I
ever want another relationship again. I'm sure this is not uncommon,
but the way I feel now, I think I just want to be single for the rest
of my life.
Sure I miss sex, in fact I REALLY miss sex, but to become involved with
someone else is just not worth the price for me, and with AIDS and all
the other lovely diseases out there, the odds of finding a partner that
does not want a commitment and just wants to get together from time to
time for a sexual encounter, are next to impossible to find.
I do agree with the advice that you should just start doing the things
that YOU want and like to do and someone will pop up when you lease
expect it. At least that is what I hear....
Good Luck
Mike
|
| 1153.6 | Similarly | YUPPY::DAVIESA | Be bold and fear not | Mon Apr 22 1991 07:46 | 26 |
|
Mike,
I feel similarly to you.
I'm still experiencing the new pleasures of being single, and right
now I can't imagine that I'll ever want to give up my singlehood.
I'm open to the idea that I'll change my mind about this sometime,
but I can't imagine that happening soon (like, within a couple
of years at least).
I don't miss sex that much, to my surprise. But I *do* miss
non-sexual touch - I truly appreciate the hugs I get, and
my friends who will just hold me sometimes.
I too am far more aware of the risks of casual sex than I was
when I was last single, and I'm happy that I now have the
maturity to confidently bring up the subject of safe sex if I need to.
I'm working on finding out what I enjoy doing! I spent so long
doing what "we enjoyed" that I haven't thought about this for
a while (and, now that I am, very revealing it is too...)
'gail
|
| 1153.7 | A different perspective | MORO::BEELER_JE | PROUD to be an American | Tue Apr 23 1991 02:40 | 17 |
| Wow ... I can really identify with the base note. I went from high
school to the Marines, then, was married - bingo. After 20 years of
marriage I found myself ... single. The *thought* of a date scared
dickens out of me.
Finally, I said "what is a date?" Well, it's being with someone that
you enjoy being with, discussing things, going places, not a heck of a
lot different than what you've always done with your wife .. just that
the perspective is different. After accepting that - things went quite
well - personally, I don't like the term "date" because there's too
much (sometimes) attached to the word .. why not just "getting together
with someone" and doing things that you both enjoy?
Hey, just do what comes natural - be yourself - enjoy ... to Hell with
the terminology and labels.
Jerry
|