Conference quark::human_relations-v1

         Wow....without so much as a hint about what she likes
         and doesn't like....the only thing we have to go on is
         that she [apparently] *likes* *you*!
         
         So....
         
         Repeat your vows. Do something that commemorates
         the special feelings you attached to her birthday
         last year by marrying her on that day.
         
         And...then give her *you*...undivided attention and
         all....no phone calls, no interruptions, no outside
         interferences of any sort....just you doing whatever
         *she* wants you to do...even if that is only sitting
         and holding hands over tea...just the two of you.
         
         Just a thought....I don't go much for big productions,
         so this kind of thing would really mean a lot to
         me, but if she enjoys extravaganzas...this would
         be inappropriate.
         
         Have a Happy!
         
         Melinda
         

    Curt,
    
    	Rent a limo for the night/day. Go for a mistery ride along the
    coast, thru the city at night. You don't have to stop at any place
    in paticular. Take you bestman and maid of honor. I drive part time,
    and have taken folks for nights out on the town. I took a couple
    who were saying to me, 'drive', to the upper deck of terminal B
    in Logan and they watched the planes land and take off. Road along
    the coast and I played, my own tapes, clasical, jazz, and soft rock
    & roll.
    
    George

    
    
    .2 sounds nice to me!  I wonder if you can bring candles and secure
    them some way?
    
    What kind of money do you want to spend?
    
    What about taking her to a quaint Bed N Breakfast?  
    SUGGESTION: Meeting House Inn in Henniker NH.  Quiet and quaint.
    Skiing at Patspeak during the day, dinner and a hot tub at night!
    Makes for a PERFECT weekend!
    
    What are some of her favorite things to do?  Hobbies?
    

    Curt,
       So far it seems the replies say do whatever she likes. What does
    she like Does she like a favorite cousine that YOU can cook?
    Does she like candlelight dinners, surrounded by roses, soft romantic
    music including YOUR wedding song. Did yu have a video made of your
    wedding? Do you/can you/might you write some romentic verses that
    only she will understand. and will bring a smile to her face.
      has she been wanting do do something special,see a certain movie,
    see a certain night club act?? Does she enjoy special friends that
    may make the night more special to her or did you want to spend
    it alone?? 
       The Best thing I know you can do for you wife is be the best
    you, for you are the man she loved enough to marry and loves enough
    to still be with you. So probably whatever you do, she'll love it!
       Good-Luck.... 
    
    Lisa

yes, and perhaps even better than a Bed & Breakfast is a real inn.

I went to one (alone :-) two weekends ago, it was Darby Field Inn
near Conway NH.

Real nice place, livingrooms with fireplaces, bookcases, comfy
chairs and couches.

Nice bar for hanging out, drinking, or just talking to other people.

Elegantly served dinner and breakfast in dining room with wonderful
view of the mountains.

Bedrooms with antique furniture and private bathroom.

Plus cross-country ski trails leading right from the premises.

I'd go back, hopefully with a woman next time (!), but even alone
I had a good time, talking to the other guests and the hired help.  Also,
I went skiing.

So, I'd say sure, take your wife someplace like Darby for her birthday.  My
cost total with tip/tax was $120.  For once in a while, it's worth it.

/Eric

    	Hey.... Keep these ideas coming................... I may not
    wait till her birthday................... Seriously though, i love
    the ideas, but i certainly will not complain about more...
    lets turn this note into the one with the most replies in  the history
    of noting.........................
    curt
    

    aside :-)....the current note with the most replies is well over
    8000...I kinda doubt this one will make it :-)
    
    Bonnie

    Take her for a weekend at the Ritz
    			.
    			.
    			.
    			.
                       In Europe....

    How about a Hot-Air Balloon Ride to a secluded cottage in the Mountains
    Of Vermont.  Make sure there is no electricity, lots of firewood,
    lots of Hot Chocolate, and lots of blankets to snuggle in.
    
    Bill

    The husband of a friend created a "Treasure Hunt" for her.  He planned
    for several weeks in advance and bought different items all over
    town, then arranged with the certain staff memebers at the stores
    to be watching for his wife, who would come in and ask for the package
    on a certain day at a certain time.  Everyone was happy to oblige.
    He then spent days writing little rhymes sending her all over to
    pick up mystery packages from the pre-alerted merchants.
    
    The first surprise was a bouquet of flowers with the first treasure
    hunt clue attached.  From there she picked up such items as a box
    of candy, a pink teddy, a single rose, and finally ended up at a
    local hotel in the bridal suite.  At 5:00 that afternoon, a young
    man with a guitar showed up to serenade her and present her with
    a bottle of chilled champaigne; then her husband took her to her
    favorite restaurant where she met two of her best friends for dinner.
    Afterward, she and her husband returned to the bridal suite for
    the evening and the next morning she was treated to breakfast-in-bed.
    
    She kept every note and re-read them over and over again.  It was
    the most memorable event of her married life.

    It sounded really romantic!
    
    Barb
   

    Barb,
    
    What a wonderful story and WOW! what a fantastic way to celebrate!
    
    I love it.
    
    
    -Dotti.

    RE 10:
    
    	THAT'S IT.... thats the kind of idea i am looking for............
    I think it is great.... Now to try it.........(with a few of my
    own variations)
    
    

	 RE: treasure hunt idea...

	 rent a business's electronic sign for 1/2 an hour and let
	 that print out one of the clues over and over again.... hee
	 hee hee....you can be SOOOO inventive with treasure hunts!

	 k

    	All of these ideas do sound wonderful, but...
    
    	I hate to be a cynic...
    
    	If the "wonderful birthday/anniversery celebration" is not your
    own idea, how wonderful is it really?  ANYBODY can ask their friend
    Joe Schmoe for a suggestion, but doesn't it mean far more for the
    idea to be your own?
    
        Yes, even if one of these ideas was followed, the surprise and
    fun would still be there.  But personally, it wouldn't mean much to
    me as the wife if I knew that it wasn't my hubby's idea.  And if he
    pretended that it was, well, that would be lying...
    
    --Sharon who's_getting_married_soon_and_hopes_for_creativity

    Re. 14:
    
    How many ideas are original?  Words like "I love you" are probably
    as old as time, but coming from the right person, they are the most
    original idea going!  If my husband cared enough to do a little
    "network brainstorming" to try to come up with an idea he could
    build upon, I'd be thrilled!  I think it was wonderful that the
    basenoter tried to find the best ideas he could, so he can do something
    really special for his wife.  So what if he borrows the idea from
    someone else?  By the time he's done, it will be *his* version on
    the orignal theme and very romantic!
    
    Barb

    It was his idea to ask for help....
    
    That shows that he's thinking of her enough to get hundreds of 
    people to brainstorm with him on the ideas.  The final idea he will
    pick, just like birthday cards....You look at lots before you pick
    out the right one....This time he's spending shows how much he cares...
    
    
    The treasure hunt thing works great.  I did it once when I gave
    the SO a gift.  One of the things I used was a audio cassete of
    the Beatle's Birthday song and the next clue was after the song.
    She had to hunt down a tape-deck and play it.  She loved the suspence.
    
    Bill

I have some reservations with this topic, but in a different way...

I would hope that the author would take the time to personalize/customize any
ideas that they got from this topic.  The replies here are just ideas to spark
more ideas...

What I have a problem with is the tendancy for people to read about all these
wonderfull ideas, and get increased expectations, and *EXPECT* such grandious
schemes from their SO, and when they don't get them say, 'how come you never do
XXX for me like YYY did for ZZ???'.

Blech!  An expected and demanded gift is not a gift.

Jim. 

    Jim's last note sort of diverted the subject a little but I would
    like to expand it a bit.  Gifts, surprises and attention are important
    to me and I look forward to them.
    
    When I was married my ex did not understand my need and my feeling
    was 'if he didn't think of it' it wasn't worth making a scene. 
    I for several years made a lot of his birthday etc.
    
    He remarried and his new wife...laid down the law...he was reminded
    of events...told what to buy and he complied.  She was happy, I
    guess.  But you know what...now he does it on his own.
    
    I still don't think it is worth it...but the change is interesting.

    CURT -
    
    	You may want to consider an escape week-end at a nice resort
    type hotel - sort of a second honeymoon.
    
    	If you do something like that for every birthday or anniversary,
    it will help contribute to many years of happy marriage.
    
    		Best of  luck - from one married 28 years.
    
    				Guy  B.
    
    

    RE 14
    	Being the base noter i want to say a few things. I do understand
    what you are saying, but do not agree.
    	I love my wife dearly. I plan on devoting a lifetime of making
    her the happiest person in the world. With that in mind I decided
    to ask for suggestions. I am not asking someone to tell me exactly
    how to act, what to do, or what to say.
    	Instead I am looking for ideas to (as one noter said) "spark"
    my imagination. I try (because I do love her) to think of little
    things I can do to create happiness, but sometimes people can give
    you thoughts and "ideas" that can make you be creative.  
    	With those ideas, I can keep on doing special things that will
    continue to make our life GREAT ! 
    	I am just looking, listening, and dreaming. YOU are all making
    that possible. Keep those ideas coming, because I want as many ideas
    as I can possibly get. I want to know what things make you happy.
    I want to know what makes you feel special. Some of those ideas
    will not even come close to applying to our life, but I can still
    learn and take note.
    
    	so to stop rambling.......... Thank you all for applying and
    keep them coming..................... and I am still looking for
    at least 3981 more replies. I think we can beat that "alltime high
    base note" with 4000 replies.
    
    curt (who will continue to strive to do everything in his power
    to make her feel loved, and the most important person in my life)
    

    I have never had a memorable birthday.  I have never gone out with
    anyone that would take the time to do something special just for
    me.  I would be thrilled to death if someone took the time and asked
    for ideas and combined them with their own.  What a great way of
    telling someone that they are special, that because of them your
    life is special.
    
    I think what you are doing is great!!  I certainly would be thrilled.
    
    On my Ex boyfriends last birthday that we were together I placed
    cards and notes all over the apartment, in his lunch, jacket pocket,
    bathroom mirror, etc.....He got a kick out of it....Then I took
    him away for the weekend.
    
    Linda

    
    
    	Well, I think I figured out what to do.............................
    
    
    I just got sicker than I have ever been before....... And Now three
    days before Her birthday, she seems to be coming down with
    it..........
    
    Talk about the ultimate plan for making someone happy...............
            (yes this is sarcastic.....I am depressed)
    
    
    
    
    Anyone got some quick ideas on how to make someone feel good when
    they are sick? (Ha)....................
                                           
    
    Curt.... (Who should have stayed in bed another month)
    
    
    

    Is she allergic to soft music and flowers and chicken noodle soup?,
    all at the same serving?

    Well I can tell you one birthday sugestion I won't be doing again
    real soon. A suprise party! 
    
    I've been reading this note as I've been planning,plotting and scheming
    to get a suprise party together for my SO. Well just when you think
    you have every base covered, forget it.
    
    The party is tommorrow night, and the SO has every intention in the
    world of going out with a group of people from a place he used to
    work. As he appropriatly put it, the chance of going out with them
    this particular Friday night is one in a million. He doesn't know
    how right he is.
    
    Anyway it looks like he'll be a no show unless I tell him about
    the party. I've never been so dissapointed in my life!

    Has anyone had the pleasure of pulling of a big suprise party? The
    suprisee couldn't have been half as stuborn as my SO.
    
    sigh,
    
    Gail

    
>    The party is tommorrow night, and the SO has every intention in the
>    world of going out with a group of people from a place he used to
>    work.


	 If you know any of these people, why don't you call and tell
	 them!  Invite them to the surprise party too...in fact they
	 may even have a way of getting him there....

	 k

    Right... enlist their help....
    

    re last 2
    
    THAT is the issue. So far I have talked to about 6 ZTel (former
    company) people that are now DECies. Most of them were at the party
    Tuesday. They've all been most cordial but do not know much about
    the get together Friday. Some are saying they don't think it's going
    to happen. I feel like have half the world working on this thing.
    I had one person even call Mike (my SO) and ask for name & numbers,
    under the pretense he needed them for work. Mike claimed he didn't
    know any names or numbers.
    
    I'm baffled, frustrated and half hoping Mike read H_R!

    If he still claims the gather is happening when I talk to him tonight
    I see no choice but to blow the suprise...
    
    Gail...I'll let you know

	 Hummm....sounds fishy to me....

	 maybe he knows about the surprise party already and is just
	 trying to drive you crazy!

	 k

    Does anyone know what the traditional gift is for the 15th Wedding
    anniversary?
    
    I thought we had the listing here but I can't seem to find it.  In fact
    I thought I had entered it.  
    
    

From my directory, though I can't say where it originated:
    
    Year 		Traditional		Modern
    --------------------------------------------------
    
    First      		Paper			Clocks
    Second		Cotton			China
    Third		Leather			Crystal/Glass
    Fourth		Fruit/Flowers		Appliances
    Fifth		Wood			Silverware
    Sixth      		Candy/Iron		Wood
    Seventh		Wool/Copper		Desk Sets
    Eighth    		Bronze/Pottery		Linens/Laces
    Ninth		Pottery/Willow		Leather
    Tenth		Tin/Alumin(i)um		Diamond Jewellry
    Eleventh		Steel			Fashion Jewellry
    Twelfth    		Silk/Linen		Pearls
    Thirteenth		Lace			Textiles/Furs
    Fourteenth		Ivory			Gold Jewellry
    Fifteenth		Crystal			Watches
    Twentieth		China			Platinum
    Twenty-Fifth	Silver			Silver
    Thirtieth		Pearl			Diamond
    Thirty-Fifth	Coral			Jade
    Fortieth  		Ruby			Ruby
    Forty-Fifth		Sapphire		Sapphire
    Fiftieth   		Gold			Gold
    Fifty-Fifth		Emerald			Emerald
    Sixtieth   		Diamond			Diamond
    
    Karen