Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    Try inquiring in
    
    TLE::EASYNET_CONFERENCES 
    or
    USSCSL::ASKENET

    Actually, I think this is just as good a place to ask as any.
    Yes, look in EASYNET_CONFERENCES, but if you don't find one, I expect
    that many people interested in the subject are already reading
    this conference.  ASKENET is not the place to ask about conferences,
    even though lots of people do so.
    
    For now, I see no reason why you can't discuss the topic here.
    It's as relevant to Human Relations as anything else we discuss.
    
    					Steve

    
    
    	Deja vu!! I was just thinking about that over the weekend! My
    Dad died 3+ years ago of cancer and it's bothering me more now than
    it ever did. I'm considering starting a conference devoted to the
    subject (as if I don't moderate enough of them!!!). We could discuss
    it here but I think it could be a subject for it's own conference.
    
    	.0, let me know what you find and get back to me. 
    
    							mike

    Mike,
    
    I looked in the easynet_conference and found a medical file.  This
    file, however, is people asking for information.  I think that if
    you started a file on cancer, we would find that a lot of people
    have been or are now going through some tough times.  I know I am,
    and I'm taking any help and support ANYBODY has to offer.  It's
    just too much to go through alone.

    I'd like to add my support for such a conference/note...  I wish
    it had been around last summer.  If .3 begins a conference, could
    you please let me know?  I don't have the time to regularly note
    but I think I could make time for that conference.
    
    Billie
    

    
    I just this morning read this topic and replies.
    
    Has anything been found out about a new conference for cancer related
    subjects and support? I have a real need to talk with someone
    about this. 
    
    The word CANCER scares the sh*t out of anyone. Dealing with it
    in almost any capacity is HELL!
    
    
    Please let us/me know!
    
    
    Rob
    

    Boy, I really wish I could be of more help.  I don't know a whole
    lot about Cancer but I do know what it's like living with someone
    who has a life-threatening disease.  My daughter died two years
    ago from Cystic Fibrosis.  It's tough going through it alone.  The
    difference is Cancer can be curable.  I have friends who have beat
    Cancer.
    
    I do want to suggest though, in most hospitals you can find a Hospice
    program.  These people are trained to work with Cancer patients
    and their families/caretakers.  They are caring and compassionate
    and have dealt with lots of different cases.  They can offer help
    or just an ear.
    
    Also, I really can't offer much advice but I can offer an ear to
    listen.
    
    Best of luck to everyone.
    
    HUGS FOR HEALTH
    
    Marie
    

   
    
    	OK, I will start a conference but not this week. I'm just too
    	busy with work.  I ask that if an experienced moderator(s) would
    	like to help me out I'd GREATLY appreciate it as at the moment
   	I am experiencing moderator burnout. (In excess of 6 conferences!)
    
    	The conference will be at ILAVU::CANCER. Please hold off adding
    	it to your notebook until I announce it. It's going to take
    	me a bit to set this up properly and I'm not opening it till
    	I have at least one other moderator.
    
    	Thanks for the interest,
    
    							mike

    Well, I'm glad someone is finally going to start something for this
    topic.  Thanks, Mike.  I wish it was started sooner - my mother
    isn't expected to live for more than a week or two.  My sister and
    I did get involved with Hospice, but sometimes you just need to
    talk without waiting to get in touch with somebody.  This is pure
    HELL!  I'm only 21, and I still need and depend on my mother for
    a lot.  It took me a while, but I just finally realized how important
    she is to me, and now she has to go.  I never thought I'd have to
    worry about living without her around.
    
    Well, I guess I'll wait until the conference is started to let it
    all pour out.  L I F E   R E A L L Y   S * C K S   S O M E -
    T I M E S  ! ! ! 

	Perhaps a more general conference, devoted to serious and
	terminal illnesses in general, would be a good idea. Many of
	the issues aren't specific to just cancer.
	
	Mike (whose grandmother has serious heart problems)

    
    
    	RE: .9
    
    	Life does not suck. Death sucks.. Keep remembering that....
    	Enjoy what you have now even if it is difficult. Let everything
    	in the past no affect anything today and in the future cuz
    	that way you'll be better able to deal with any regrets later.
    
    	RE: .10
    
    	Hmm.. Good idea... Maybe calling it TERMINAL_ILLNESS or something
    	like that would be good.. Any other suggestions??
    
    							mike

    I'm all for a conference on cancer.  I had cancer two years ago,
    and even though I have had no reoccurrences, I'm not considered
    cured until I pass the five year mark.  I still at times have depressed
    feelings.  I think I could add a lot, especially when you are first
    told that you have cancer.
    
    Enis

	Cancer (heart disease, too) is not necessarily terminal...
	
	Such a conference could also serve as a central place to
	discuss AIDS (which keeps popping up in various other
	conferences). However, since that is such a hot topic it might
	swamp other discussions - perhaps restricting the discussions
	to the medical details and the personal side of how
	individuals deal with their own serious illness and that of
	loved ones, leaving the political aspects to other
	conferences, would provide the right balance.

	Mike

    
    RE: .0 + .9 -
    
    Hi.  I realize I'm late responding, but I thought I'd try and offer
    some support as well.  Your situation sounds similar to what my
    family & I went through when my mother died 4 years ago of cancer.
    So, first of all I want to let you know that I DEFINITELY can
    appreciate your suffering and anguish.  It's about the toughest
    thing to deal with at any age, let alone a relatively young one.
    
    Keeping this short because of notes and I'd be willing to talk off
    line about this, I have one or two pieces of advice to pass along.
    My first would be to spend this time with your mother if you can.
    I mean taking days off from work and be with her, converse
    if she's able, or maybe just sit there.  I spent the last two days
    of my mother's life with her and it was very comforting later. 
    My only regret was that I hadn't taken more time out of my job to
    be with her when she needed me, but I eventually forgave myself
    for that.  
    
    The other support system I can offer is to tell you that the Dana
    Farber Cancer Institute in Boston used to have a hot-line for support
    issues around cancer.  They would also be able to point you in the
    direction of support groups dealing with cancer and/or the grieving
    process as your mother's condition worsens.
                      
    The church also offers counseling for grieving families, I don't
    know if you're involved in with one or not, but that can be a source
    of support.  
    
    My heart goes out to you & again feel free to talk off line because
    I know first hand about this type of loss and the impact it can
    have.  Take care....Christy Edwards
    

    First of all, I want to thank everybody that wrote to me
    directly, offering all kinds of support.  I'm sorry I 
    never responded, but I took an emergency leave of absence
    to spend almost a week in the hospital with my mother.  She
    passed away August 10.  Today is my first day back at work.
    I took off four weeks to get a grip on things and to take a
    trip with my boyfriend to Cancun.
    
    The whole thing was very, very difficult, and still is from 
    time to time.  I miss her so much it is almost overwhelming.
    
    I don't know why people stopped writing in this file, but if
    anybody is going through what I just went through, I can now
    offer advice and support.
    
    Thanks again to those of you who did your best to support
    me through this!
    
    Amy
    

    Amy...
    
    I am so sorry to hear about your mother.  Dealing with death is
    the most difficult thing anyone has to go through.  If you need
    someone to talk to please call me.
    
    I also wondered why activity in this file stopped.  I think it is
    an important topic for those who are trying to deal with Cancer.
    
    What's up out there??
    
    Peace,
    
    Marie