[Search for users] [Overall Top Noters] [List of all Conferences] [Download this site]

Conference quark::human_relations-v1

Title:What's all this fuss about 'sax and violins'?
Notice:Archived V1 - Current conference is QUARK::HUMAN_RELATIONS
Moderator:ELESYS::JASNIEWSKI
Created:Fri May 09 1986
Last Modified:Wed Jun 26 1996
Last Successful Update:Fri Jun 06 1997
Number of topics:1327
Total number of notes:28298

348.0. "how to find roommates" by USMRW4::AFLOOD (BIG AL) Mon Jul 13 1987 19:40

    I am startin to get into HR again after several months of inactivity.
    As some of you know, a notes relationship/engagement went sour and
    has left me with some financial problems as well as some deep emotional
    issues. Due to the broken engagement I was left with a rented house
    and a low level of available cash. I found one roommate and she
    seems to be a compatible roommate. The other roommate turned into
    a real problem........
    
    I received a phone call several weeks ago ona Saturday from a guy
    in his mid 20's looking for a place, after I gave him directions
    and he hung up, I got another call from a pastor of a church in
    Marlboro. He explained this persons problem and brought him over
    to Maynard to see the place. To make a long story short, I am now
    recovering from a stolen mastercard, Fraudulent use of another
    bankcard account number and loss of three blank checks which he
    passed. I have done everything I need to do to minimize my legal
    responsibilities including notifying all banks, bank card companies,
    store charge cards, and gasoline charge cards. It turns out that
    the individual involved has been doing these kinds of things for
    the last 6-7 years and the rehabilitative nature of our penal/court
    system in this state has just kept turning him loose. The last person
    he did it too(again a person he was renting a room from) was a cancer
    victim who had lost a leg to the disease. This individual was out
    5000 dollars from a 3 day blank check spree. He committed suicide
    a week after the above referenced person was sent to Billerica.
    I am not contemplating that route. Besides my banks are eating the
    checks and card misuse due to forgery. My question is:
    
    I have been advertising in the classified vaxnotes for a roommate
    without much success and the newspaper ads bring me people who it
    is obviously harder to check out. Does anyone have any suggestions
    of ways to find a decent professional roommate. I have never had
    the problems I have had the past 2 months with finding roommates.
    
    al
    
T.RTitleUserPersonal
Name
DateLines
348.1hope this helpsNCVAX1::COOPERruthless personMon Jul 13 1987 22:1915
    Check the newspaper, or even call information, I'm sure they have
    a "Roommate Referal" serice in you area.
    
    This service works kind of like a dating service.  They match people
    with similiar interest, likes and habits.  I've had several people
    go through this service with much success.
    
    (You may want to check with the Employee Assastance Program in your
    area.  They may be able to put you in touch with some very reliable
    resources.
    
    
    Good Luck!!
    CC
    
348.2CSSE::MARGEan ergonomical delight!Mon Jul 13 1987 22:429
    Check references.  
    
    Check references.
    
    Check references.
    
    If anything "smells funny" follow your feelings.
    
    
348.3forget roommate referalYODA::BARANSKIWhat, I owe you money?!?Tue Jul 14 1987 09:218
From my experiences, forget the "roommate referal" services, unless they promise
some concrete form of results, such as a new roommate, or at least n referals of
the type you specify within a certain time span, or they get paid when you find
a roommate.

Jim.

PS I'm also back in the housing market *again* 
348.4MANTIS::PARETue Jul 14 1987 09:392
    Why don't you guys just room with each other?  (there,... wasn't
    that easy?_:-)
348.5Back on the road again?HPSCAD::WALLI see the middle kingdom...Tue Jul 14 1987 12:5111
    re: .3
    
    What, again?
    
    Did the woman moaning in the fireplace get to you? :-)
    
    Sheesh!  I have one roommate who's practically invisible, one who
    annoys me a lot but about small things, and one who's one of my
    best friends.  I suppose I'm not doing too badly...
    
    DFW
348.6A buyer's guide...BMT::LOKIETZSteve Lokietz, NYO, 333-6681Thu Jul 16 1987 17:1938
    I put in my vote for checking out a referral service.  I have had
    and know several people who have had much success with this, if
    the service really screened and matched people.  The services can
    also suggest things to ask the person to minimize the probability
    of a major imcompatibility problem.
    
    I've also seen some good books out on roomate hunting.
    
    Since I've had close to 20 roomates over the past 12 years (the
    large number is due almost entirely to changing personal circumstances,
    not compatibility problems), I consider myself knowledgeable in
    the subject.  Having a long talk before agreeing on anything is
    the most important thing.
    
    Ask things like:
    
            1)sleeping/working/eating schedule (e.g. will you consistently 
              need to take showers at the same time each day; will
              the person be up late making noise at night, etc); 
    
	    2)degree of neatness/slobbishness;
        
            3)communication ability (I've found it important that
              each person agree to let the other know, in a polite and 
              responsible way, when something bothers them **before** 
              it becomes an issue; then you have a chance to talk things 
              out and compromise (and build a real friendship sometimes).  
              You can't expect the person to be a mind reader, and vice versa);
    
    
    and so on.  As a previous note said, if something smells funny,
    whether in the conversation or in a reference, say thank you but
    no thank you.

    Don't hesitate to bring up an issue that's really important to
    you because you're afraid you won't hear what you want.  Better
    to get it out in the open than risk it becoming a problem when it's
    not so easy to change your mind.    	    
348.7credit check & toilet paperCADSE::GLIDEWELLMon Jul 27 1987 19:5813
A friend of my owns and rents seven apartments in Newton, Mass.  She calls 
all of their references, and she usually asks for four, including the last 
landlord and the last and current boss.

She occasionally pays for a credit check from one of the large credit 
bureaus.  She is primarily looking for people who will pay their expenses 
on time and not damage the property.

WOMANOTES 197.* has a long discussion on public washroom manners and one 
noter said (approximately):  Before accepting a new roommate, I call and 
ask their last roommate, "Did this person ever put up a new roll of toilet 
paper."  She says it seems to work as a good test question and she has had 
some very good roommates.     Meigs