Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    CQ---
    
    Why not note?  It's harmless;  lighten up.  
    
    Some folks like to talk politics;  yuck, not me.   Some like to
    talk about their goldfish, too..
    
    Live and let live, kiddo,
    
    Jane

    I don't understand the reaction of .1.
    
    I believe that communication involves sharing most of life with
    others.  If you hold back all but what you think is of "life-or-death
    consequence", you'll find that others consider you emotionless
    and uncommunicative.  I had this problem a lot when I was married,
    and have since learned how to be more open and communicative.
    
    "Chatter", which is the kind of communication you seem to be
    skeptical of, has its purpose as long as it does not overwhelm.
    But I like to have friends tell me what their day was like - the
    closer someone is to me, the more I want to hear.  If I have
    an "SO", I'll listen to just about anything - as if it's part of
    her life I'd like it to be part of mine too.  Showing interest
    in what someone says is showing interest in them.
    
    					Steve

Sometimes your tone of voice, your attentiveness, and generally
your willingness to talk AND listen, communicate more than just
the literal meaning of your words.  They reinforce or renew an
emotional bond, just as much as a hug or a pat on the back would.

Loss of intimacy can be signaled by failure to talk, failure to
attend (listen), failure to make eye contact, or failure to touch.

  Because life is worth living.  Anything to do with life is worth sharing.
  Life or death conflicts seldom occur every day.  Although you may not
  want to share each and every detail, you may want to share the highlights.
  Or, you may want to share some joy, or some disappointment with somebody
  else.  Why?  They're human, too.  They might just be able to relate
  in a way that never occurred to you.  In allowing yourself to be human,
  you also allow the other person to also be human.  Not to say that everyone
  should be able to relate to whatever you want to communicate, or would
  even want to, but you can never know unless you try.  Even hearing your
  own voice express your feelings may help you in a way that nothing else
  will.
  
  We don't just live on the crests and valleys of life; we never have.
  We live so much in between them that those times too, are worth sharing
  and communicating with another person.
  
  How sad it would be to have so little to share with one another.
  
  
  
  							Terza
  
  

    I thing .3 is succinct - Verbal medium - non-verbal message
    
    Most of our sensory stuff is passive in that we don't emit energy
    and sense the reflections of that energy (like pulsing in sonar).
    Telling other entities (not just people) stuff is a way of actively
    projecting parts of ourselves and seeing what is reflected.  Maybe
    an "audio mirror" is an OK metaphor.  Consider the reasons that
    I might be writing this reply, or the author wrote the basenote
    - I hope to get a reflected image of "me" in any comments that 
    may be generated.
    
    At a level deeper than chatter, I sometimes tell a few folks about
    things I am reluctant to reveal - fears, anxieties, vulnerabilities
    dreams - the raw material for initmacy - When I do this, I am seeking,
    in addition to a reflection of acceptance, to overcome the isolation
    that results from our self-importance.

    cause sometimes were very domb
    

    
    I once saw this on a trivet:
    
    If life were not worth living, if no one were the better
    for having met you on the way, and known the sunshine of your stay.
    
    so it's hokey - but I like the idea of sharing thoughts, feelings,
    ideas...and also being able to affect other people (however small
    that affect is - and hopefully in a positive way) with my actions.
    
    It's a small world in a giant universe, but if I didn't keep in
    touch with who/what is going on - it wouldn't be worth diddley to
    me.
    
    Jody