Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    I like to send out cards.  I get two kinds - "Christmas" cards and
    "Seasons Greetings" cards.  I often like to get a couple varieties
    of each kind, and tend towards those from Recycled Paper Products
    because they're often clever and attractive.
    
    Indeed, if I don't get a card in return I may remove someone from
    my list, unless I know I mailed the cards out too late (as I usually
    do).
    
    Remember that Hannukah (pick your favorite spelling) is a holiday
    with similar emotions for Jews as Christmas is to Christians.
    
    However - for myself, who is of Jewish heritage but is personally
    non-religious - I celebrate Christmas as a family holiday, without
    religious overtones.
    
    It's nicest if you can enclose a letter with cards, or jot a short
    note, but I rarely do.
    					Steve

    I use Christmas cards (and birthday cards) as a way to keep in touch
    with folks I don't see all year.  I don't send them to people I
    see all the time, but to distant friends.
    
    I used dBase III to make out a little data base for myself based
    on my address book, and all the birthdays are listed in calendar
    order.  That helps me do the Christmas cards, too, and I was seriously
    considering preprinting the labels on the computer.
    
    I remember being disgusted by Christmas cards when I was growing
    up.  They were slick and pre-printed (even the names inside were
    printed.)  My mom was required by some kind of social law :-) to
    send one to everyone they knew, distant, near, old, and young. 
    I think she sent over 300 a year!!  Incoming Christmas cards were
    evaluated for their "status value" (tasteful, tacky, expensive, artsy,
    religious, secular, and so forth).  
                                                                        
    It took me years before I was able to enjoy sending Christmas cards!

    In 1980 I sent out New Year cards to some friends--the cards
    were xeroxes of one I'd drawn.  Since then I've done the same,
    sometimes using a color xerox (expensive, about a buck a card,
    but nice), or hand-coloring (time-consuming) or getting a friend
    to let me do silk-screening (time-consuming and messy).
    
    About this time every year I wish I hadn't established the
    precedent, but I do it anyway.  "Happy New Year" is non-religious
    and general, and it lets me be a bit late; hand-made or hand-designed
    should seem more friendly and less commercial, or so I hope.
    
    			-John Bishop

Believe my real question in .0 may have been a bit hidden.

Is sending or receiving holiday cards meaningful and worthwhile from the 
point of view of the friendships (human relations) involved?

When you don't get a card from a friend, do you feel offended?

	Mike

Re: .1 (QUARK::LIONEL)

>    Remember that Hannukah (pick your favorite spelling) is a holiday
>    with similar emotions for Jews as Christmas is to Christians.

This is a misconception!  While Christmas relates to the fundamentals of 
Christian beliefs, Chanukah only commemorates a political rebellion against a 
second-century ruler who tried to suppress Jewish religious freedom.  It's 
just a minor holiday on the Jewish calendar.

For Jewish holidays similar in importance to what Christmas is for Christians,
I'd consider Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur, the most solemn days when we stand
in judgment before God and ourselves.  Or Passover, when we celebrate our
becoming a free people.  

Getting back to the main topic (greeting cards), the time of year most Jews 
send out greeting cards is in September, for the Jewish New Year.  Chanukah 
cards are a "me too" kind of thing most Jews prefer to avoid.

By the way, would any Christians care to comment on how you'd feel if a Jewish
acquaintance sent you a Rosh HaShanah card wishing that you be inscribed for 
a good year?  Personally, I'm not very comfortable receiving Christmas cards 
or Chanukah cards or "Season's Greeting" cards.  I suspect that the feelings
would be similar with the situation reversed.  Comments?

David Ellis -- Secure Systems Group -- LTN2-2/C08 -- DTN 226-6784 

|By the way, would any Christians care to comment on how you'd feel if a Jewish
|acquaintance sent you a Rosh HaShanah card wishing that you be inscribed for 
|a good year?  

 Well, I'm not much of a Christian(!) but frankly, I'd accept the card in the
spirit in which it was offered. I'm not sure I understand the "inscribed"
statement, but it doesn't sound too bad!!! I think I'd be more concerned if
I received a Christmas card expressing a "right wing, fundamentalist" 
sentiment!!! (-:

 As Dave Allen used to say at the end of his show "May your God go with you".

		Nigel

Re. .6: Generally speaking, non-Jews of my acquaintance would not be
upset to receive such a card.  They may not understand the quotation,
but the sentiment of someone expressing good wishes on an occasion of
some importance should come through.

Some Jews are concerned about the "christmasization" of Hannukah, some
not.  But I doubt that most would resent receiving a Chirstmas card
sent in a cordial spirit.

In our house, we often have Hannukah lights and the Christmas tree going
at the same time, depending on the timing of the respective holidays,
although Christmas is celebrated only as a cultural (i.e. non-religious)
holiday.  Cards, on the occasions we send them, tend to be neutral
with respect to any religious motif or expression.

Dan

    
    I love buying and sending Christmas cards because they relate to
    two things I love - shopping and art.  Some Christmas cards are
    horrible, but some are really beautiful and unique.  Each year I
    enjoy going to little, gift shops in places like Newport, R.I.,
    or Quincy Mkt., or *nice* card shops in the big malls, such as the
    Watertown Arsenal.  Trying to find my favorite cards to send is
    something like selecting a painting to hang in the living room.
    They can also involve personal expression - I've sent quite a few
    cards with cats on them.
    
    I send Christmas cards to the people who mean the most in my life,
    relatives or friends, regardless of how often I see them.  When
    I was younger it used to bother me if people I sent to didn't respond.
     But, I try to do things for people just because I *want* to and
    not because I expect something back.  So, it takes quite a bit to
    make me drop a name from my Christmas list now.
    
    As an agnostic raised in Protestant household, I'm just used to
    celebrating Christmas and sending cards as an annual event but with
    no religious overtones.  Christmas is fun and it's one tradition
    that I enjoy and don't object to, but it has nothing to do with
    Christianity for me.
    
    I would not be offended if I received a greeting card for a Jewish
    holiday, but since I am very ignorant about what Jewish holidays
    mean and stand for, I probably would have no idea what the card
    referred to (if you know what I mean?).  I've never sent a Jewish
    person a Christmas card, only because I'd be kind of afraid of
    offending them and would probably think they wouldn't expect one
    anyway.
    
    Lorna
    

    As a non-Christian, I avoid sending cards that include the word
    "Christmas" on or in the card, but I do send out a few cards to
    close friends and relatives that I rarely see.  I select cards that
    say "Season's Greetings" or "Happy Holidays" if I can.  However,
    if I find some particularly nice cards that say "Merry Christmas"
    on them, I may send them anyway.
    
    I would not be offended by someone sending me a card for their
    religious holiday (Jewish, Moslem, Hindu, whatever), but I would
    like to get an explanation of the holiday if the person is not sure
    that I understand the meaning of the holiday.
    
    Cards from salesmen, banks, stores that I've shopped in and they've
    got my name for some reason, and various charities are all candidates
    for the trash.  I like getting cards with letters in them from friends
    or family.
    
    Elizabeth