Conference quark::human_relations-v1

132.0. "Those who prey on human misery..." by MMO03::PNELSON (Longing for Topeka) Sun Nov 02 1986 12:59

    This appeared in this morning's PARADE magazine, advertising the book
    "How to Find the Love of Your Life -- 90 Days to a Permanent
    Relationship."  I was/am appalled enough to want to share it with the
    other participants in this conference who are trying so hard to
    understand the very complex and difficult concept of how we relate to
    each other.  Here's the secret to instant gratification!  Happiness is
    easy -- just take a pill, just read a book, just..., just..., just...
    Instant, effortless bliss! Live happily ever after in one easy step!
    
                         ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!
    
    Here the text reprinted, of course, without permission: 
    
                      .....................
    
    
                      An open letter to all
                     unmarried women and men

You know what you want.  You want a special person with whom you 
can share your most intimate secrets -- someone who understands 
you and loves you just the way you are.  You want to experience 
the simple pleasure of sitting together at the kitchen table on a 
rainy Saturday morning, both of you in bathrobes, sipping a 
steaming cup of coffee and reading the paper.  You want to be 
able to share your successes and setbacks with someone who really 
cares.  You want to know that you have a soulmate, someone who 
sees the world as you do.  You want to find someone with whom you 
can share the bittersweet experience of gracefully growing old 
together.  You want never to be lonely again!

                      The way it used to be

If you are beginning to question if there is something wrong with 
you, don't.  Finding a mate used to be a lot easier.  A 
generation or two ago most people lived in the same community 
where they were raised.  They knew everyone, often marrying their 
childhood sweethearts.  They would then live in the same 
community for the rest of their lives.  Finding a mate under 
those circumstances was very easy.
  But today it's much different.  We're all from somewhere else.  
We move across town or across country, leaving our friends and 
neighbors behind.  And suddenly, when we are ready for marriage 
(or remarriage), we find ourselves alone, not knowing how to meet 
the right kind of people.  Unfortunately, while our world has 
changed, our methods for finding a partner have not...until now.

                         Today's answer

My name is Ben Dominitz, author of the book, "How to Find the 
Love of Your Life".  In it, I explain a completely new and 
revolutionary method, unlike any ever offered, to help those 
seeking a long-lasting relationship.  This is completely opposed 
to the current ideas about how to find someone -- ideas that 
don't amount to much more than "circulate and meet people."  And 
yet, this method, which has been hailed by experts and readers 
alike, is easy and dignified.  In fact, it is downright 
old-fashioned.  In short, it's something anyone can do -- 
something YOU can do.  I promise.
   After reading my book, you will finally understand why you 
haven't yet found the right person, and you will see why the 
usual "methods" for meeting others have actually worked against 
you.  Most important, you will learn, with my highly effective 
method, how to dramatically increase your chances for long-lasting 
love with the right person.

                    Among the things you will
                           learn are:

o   Why you should avoid "chance encounters," singles bars, and 
    parties to meet your mate.
o   Why the "first date" is among the WORST ways of getting to 
    know someone and how you can easily replace it with an 
    incredibly effective alternative.
o   How to overcome men's fear of intimacy -- "must read" for 
    BOTH men and women.
o   Why the best singles are "hidden" and how you can use an 
    old-fashioned idea for meeting an unlimited number.
o   The simple test of knowing RIGHT AWAY if someone is right for 
    you.
o   How to instantly increase your attractiveness.
o   Why your physical appearance doesn't have to affect your 
    chances for love.
o   Why my method is highly-effective (sic) for people of all 
    ages, including senior citizens.
o   What traits make you unique and how to use them to appeal to 
    the person of your dreams.
o   Why being "attract"-ive doesn't mean that you must be 
    physically attractive.
o   How to make sure that the right relationship keeps growing.
o   How you can meet up to 24 interesting and highly eligible 
    people, face-to-face, in the next 90 days.
o   How to stop choosing the wrong people for a relationship.
o   How to remove the fear of rejection from EVER AGAIN ruining 
    your chance for happiness.
o   How to turn your new love into a permanent relationship.

    And so much more.

                         What others say

"Finally, here's a book that offers genuine help.  It's both 
compelling and highly-effective (sic).  I recommend it 
enthusiastically to anyone in search of long-lasting love
    ---Alan Loy McGinnis, Ph.D., Author
                  The Friendship Factor

"Contains much practical advice for those singles in search of 
POS (persons of opposite sex)...The book rejects both the 
passivity of chance encounters and the frenetic activity of 
single bars...Dominitz gives hints on WHOM to call, HOW to call, 
WHAT to say, and WHAT to do...The advice is down to earth."
    ---Publishers Weekly

                        No-Risk Guarantee

The publishers have asked me to tell you about their risk-free, 
iron-clad, money-back guarantee.  Read my book and follow the 
clear directions outlined in it for a period of 90 days.  If you 
are not absolutely delighted with the results, I insist that you 
send the book back for a complete refund.  You risk nothing 
except for one thing -- you may never be lonely again.

                                      (signed)
                                      Ben Dominitz

P.S.  I care about your success.  After reading my book and 
starting my plan, write to me at the address in the back of the 
book.

                  .....................

Instructions for ordering followed the above text.  One for $9.95 
plus postage and handling, or...
SAVE!  Order two for $18.95 plus postage and handling!

    According to this, love must be PFM which no-one has understood
    throughout the mellinia.  Pay your 9.95 and get all the answers.
    Sounds like the PTL club.  If you buy two, do you find your love
    twice as fast or do you find a love that's twice as good?
    
    For me?  NFW!
    
    I'll look for my sun in my own way,
    
    Lee

    Sounds like the Snake Oil merchant is in business again!
    
    Does the two for $18.95 imply that a bigamist needs to order two
    copies, since each copy is only good for one love?  I can imagine
    a few Arab shieks will have to order en masse for their harems.
    ;'}
    
    I think the only thing guaranteed with this deal is that the author
    will get rich ...
    
    Steve_who's_ordering_his_copy_today_in_the_chance_that_this_is_*THE*
    _miracle_cure_he's_been_looking_for_for_a_long_time_:-)

    
    Judas H. Priest with knobs on.  This is awful.  I think I'd rather
    be alone then preprocessed.
    
    DFW

    I noticed something very similar in my daughter's teen magazines.
    The ad for the book guaranteed a boy friend to any girl using the
    technique. (My daughter wanted to send away for it and I told her
    not to waste her money.) I will have to check and see if it is the
    same people. 

    This is really nothing new - there have been books on "How to pick
    up women", etc. on the market for years.  This is just an obvious
    extension to those and also the "get rich quick" ads that still
    abound in magazines.  (I once worked for a guy who had run such
    ads - the usual "advice" you get is to run a similar ad and make
    your money from still more suckers!  Classic pyramid scheme.)
    
    I'm still amused by the women's chain letter I once heard about
    that read "Wrap up your husband and send him to the name at the
    top of the list.  When your name reaches the top, you'll receive
    1,032,597 men!"
    
    How is this book any different from the ads for perfume, cologne,
    clothing, etc. that promise instant romance?
    
    					Steve

    Suzanne...how about by the sex-pack?  This guy will be rich!

    What ever happened to close enounters of the natural kind. Some
    of the old ways should stay the same.  Does this mean the mail order
    bride business is out?

    Well ... what about mail order husbands?
    
    Are they covered by the federal credit protection act like all other
    mail order purchases ... so you can withhold payment if you're not
    satisfied with the merchandise?  Or if it fails "to deliver"?  (-#