Conference quark::human_relations-v1

        I look in the yellow pages under "Shrinks!" they'll be your
    friend for $75 and up an hour, or I'll call a crisis intervention
    hotline and listen to the recorded message that says "We're sorry
    but there is no-one here right now,, leave a message :-) :-) I
    couldn't resist.
        Really, I have found myself without a friend to turn to many
    times. For me anyway, exercise has helped alleviate the feeling
    of desperation; jogging, hiking or cycling take my mind off of
    myself long enough for me to let myself off the hook and think
    more clearly. One thing I did helped a lot, I volunteered to
    work on a crisis hotline. It lifted my spirits as well as giving
    the other party a sympathetic ear, also made me realize that
    my problems were not as bad as I thought.
        One of my other solutions is to get in my car and drive into
    Boston, where I usually shop around and usually run into some
    total stranger who I end up chatting with. Just being out among
    people can sometimes make me feel better.
        The other thing was calling a hotline and getting the numbers
    for social support groups. I did htis after getting divorced and
    it pulled me through as well as making some new friends. I dunno,
    what works for one may not work for another.
    
    Ray.......currently in the pits!

    I am sorry if this solution sounds simple and kinda corny too but
    "whistle a happy tune".
    
    Music works wonders.
    Put on you favorite and read a book.
    There is no better way to escape reality than to create a new one.
    

          I had to face the reality of divorce without any external support
     and found sailing took the place of a good friend.  I'ld head out on a
     Friday night and sail or anchor and fish until Sunday evening.  During
     the winter  I'ld head up to my wood working shop  and turn out a piece
     of furniture or hit the darkroom and catch up on my printing.  I found
     that  anything  to  keep  my mind from becoming totally engrossed with
     reality or rather maybe non reality worked for me.

          This winter?  I've already started building  my  first  sailboat.
     Wood  working  and  sailing  combined - ought to be totally uplifting.
     I'll make sure I take some pictures.

     Working towards the sun,

     Lee

    Buy a box of expensive chocolate and eat all I want with a 
    "no guilt" pass.
    
    Shop for clothes that are brighter/riskier/more garish that I
    am usually willing to wear.
    
    Take Jack Daniel's to a pity party

    	                	Play my guitar!
    
    					Phil
    

    Put Harry Chapin on the stereo, turn it up loud and sit in the dark.

    
    
    	Eat a Kimballs banana split faster than someone can eat a double
    cone.
    
    	Well I wanna escape from the reality of reality I work. And work.
    And work. I like what I do and I'm really looking forward to
    my new job so I doubt I'll be facing reality for a while.. :-) :-)

    	Hop on my motorcycle and drive. I dunno where, just drive.
    
    						mike

    
    I go out and buy a bottle of my favorite perfume.. opium... at $52
    a bottle I save it for times when I am really down in the dumps!!
    :-)
    
    later, gailann
    
    

    it depends on how deep a hole I've dug myself into...
      
      if I'm in up to my ankles then a long walk with the dogs usually
      helps.
    
      if I'm in up to my knees a good book or movie.
    
      up to my waste..  a night with the tunes and bottle of spirits
    
      shoulder high...  out comes the plastic and a shoping spree
    
      over my head..   a weekend trip with the wife and no kids!!
    
      the one thing that always works to prevent such a mood is a good
      Sauna twice a week!!!!
    Ralph

    What do I do?
    
    Well, I call an old friend long distance, or I take the girls 
    somewhere, or watch a movie, or go window shopping, or
    just go to sleep...
    
    I think the main thing is that you do something "YOU"
    really want to do... you don't even have to spend any money, 
    window shopping doesn't cost a thing!
    
    If all else fails, I call my mom... she's my BEST friend...
    
    Gale Kleinberger

	At risk of revealing I'm a manic depressive I'll 
	offer my list. 

	Think about the following...

	    Our problems are 90% perception...
            The bad times make the good possible...
	    If things aren't so good, change them leading to 

	Do the following...
	   
	    Exercise -builds confidence, natural high
	    Get an 'old fashion shave at the bottom of the Pru.
 

	If Fortuna is spinning downard contionously then I plan
	a nice vacation but this is extreme and there's always
	the risk I won't come back  ;^)

.13>	    Get an 'old fashion shave at the bottom of the Pru.
    
    
    Ah, but if you are a female, you MIGHT get some STRANGE looks
    (sorry - couldn't resist)
    
    Gale (back in her own account now 8-)..)

    Things I have done in the past:
    
    (1) Talk to myself (seriously).
    
    (2) Play my guitar.
    
    (3) Get in the car and do my best to get lost.
    
    (4) Meditate.
    
    --- jerry

    
    If I'm feeling really depressed and there are no friends available,
    one thing that usually makes me feel better is reading favorite
    poems - usually poems that reflect my own feelings.  If I'm too
    upset for that I might listen to favorite records.  Shutting the
    lights off and dancing alone to Bruce Springsteen can work wonders
    although I'm not sure why!
    
    If it's morning and I feel like driving, going to Provincetown and
    looking at and trying on antique jewelry in all the various shops
    there can make me forget every problem I ever had.
    
    If it's affection and companionship I need most, I hug my cats.
     They're not much on conversation but they're always happy to see
    me.
    
    Lorna
    

RE: .13

Some hopefully helpfull guidelines to prevent percieving the world as a problem
unnecessarily.

        <<< HYDRA::DISK$NOTES$LIBRARY:[NOTES$LIBRARY]HOLISTIC.NOTE;1 >>>
                      -< HOLISTIC Health VAX NOTES File. >-
================================================================================
Note 24.0         "How To Enjoy Your Life In Spite Of It All"            1 reply
HYDRA::BARANSKI "How Far, is Too Far?"               65 lines  21-MAR-1986 11:55
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

                             THE TWELVE PATHWAYS
                     To Unconditional Love and Happiness

                       (copied without permission from)
                ("How To Enjoy Your Life In Spite Of It All")
                             (By Ken Keyes, jr.)


FREEING MYSELF:

1. I am freeing myself from security, sensation and power addictions  that  make
   me try to forcefully control situations in  my  life,  and  thus  destroy  my
   serenity and keep me from loving myself and others. 
   
2. I am discovering how my conscious-dominating addictions  create  my  illusory
   version of the changing world of people and situations around me. 
   
3. I welcome the opportunity,  even  if  painfull,  that  my  minute  to  minute
   experience offers me to become aware of the addictions I must reprogram to be
   liberated from my robotlike emotional patterns. 

   
BEING HERE NOW:
   
4. I allways remember that I have everything I need to enjoy my  here  and  now,
   unless I am letting my consciousness be dominated by demands and expectations
   based on the dead past or the imagined future.
   
5. I take full responsibility here and now for everything I experience,  for  it
   is my own programming  that  creates  my  actions  and  also  influences  the
   reactions of people around me. 
   
6. I accept myself completely here and now and consciously experience everything
   I feel, think, say and do, including  my  emotion  backed  addictions,  as  a
   necessary part of my growth into higher consciousness. 


INTERACTING WITH OTHERS:
   
7. I open myself genuinely to all people by being willing to  fully  communicate
   my deepest feelings, since hiding in any degree keeps me stuck in my illusion
   of separateness from other people. 
   
8. I feel with loving compassion the problems of others without  getting  caught
   up emotionally in their predicaments that are  offering  them  messages  they
   need for their growth.
   
9. I act freely when I am tuned in, centered  and  loving,  but  if  possible  I
   avoid acting when I am emotionally upset and depriving myself of  the  wisdom
   that flows from love and expanded consciousness.
         

DISCOVERING MY CONSCIOUS AWARENESS:
   
10.I am continually calming the restless scanning of my rational mind  in  order
   to perceive the finer  energies  that  enable  me  to  unitively  merge  with
   everything around me.
   
11.I am constantly aware of which of the Seven Centers  of  Consciousness  I  am
   using, and I feel my energy, perceptiveness, love and inner peace growing  as
   I open all of the Centers of Consciousness. 
   
12.I am perceiving everyone, including myself, as an awakening being who is here
   to claim her birthright to the higher consciousness planes  of  unconditional
   love and oneness. 

    
    My first serious relationship was with a girl mad for Bruce
    Springsteen's music.
    
    After five years, some of his songs make me remember her.  I laid
    the ghost mostly to rest by going to one of his concerts and having
    a good time.
    
    As for me, my usual escape is to drop a disc in my CD player and
    sit down to write something.  It's nice to be able to get away from
    everything with just a notebook and a pen.
    
    DFW