Conference noted::bicycle

2814.0. "Colo. Spgs. attitude" by SSDEVO::EDMONDS (Diane) Tue Jul 19 1994 23:53

     Here's the kind of support we got from our local newspaper for
     bike to work day.
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     <<< PEAKS::DISK$TADV00_SYS:[NOTES$LIBRARY]COLORADO_BICYCLING.NOTE;1 >>>
                            -< Colorado Bicycling >-
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Note 190.0                       Gazette column                       No replies
SSDEVO::EDMONDS "Diane"                              40 lines  19-JUL-1994 17:05
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	It's Colorado Bike Week, and tomorrow (Wednesday) is Bike to Work Day.
	
	I found this out by reading a commentary by Rich Tosches in today's
	Gazette Telegraph.  

	Anybody else catch this guy's column?  I was ... amazed.  I can
	think of a few other words for it that I won't enter here.

	Here are some quotes from his commentary:

	"Bicycling is seen by people who like to wear those rubber shorts
	as a return to a natural way of life, away from motorized travel,
	a back-to-our-origins sort of thing.  Fine.  Let's all *walk* to
	work tomorrow.  And not just a regular walk.  Let's walk naked and
	all stooped over, our hands dragging on the ground.  And let's
	club a few mammals along the way.  Me want food."

	...

	"But if you are determined to bike to work, well, here are some safe-
	biking tips, as passed along by Ridefinders:

	"First, always ride in the same direction as the traffic, never
	against it.  The reason for this is simple:  When you get hit, at
	least you'll be launched closer to wherever you were going.  Riding
	against the flow of traffic will cause you to get repeatedly knocked
	right back toward your house.

	"Signal your intentions.  Left arm extended for a left turn, right
	arm extended for a right turn, both arms extended for a sudden,
	illogical stop.  This last signal is designed to free up both hands
	to brace yourself as you sail into the stand of pine trees.

	...

	"Always wear a helmet.  This is just common courtesy, designed to
	prevent motorists who graze you from having to pluck hairs out of
	their luggage racks."

    I'ld be curious to see the mail this bozo recieved from this article.
    I'm sure he'll get supportive mail as I work with a person who
    'preaches' the same philosophy, BUT I hope the local cyclist are heard
    from as well.
    
    It sounds like one of those 'stories' I use to make up as a kid.  Each
    line streatching reality a little more.  I would think the newspaper
    would more embaressed to print such crap.
    
    Talk about being grazed.. My wife Loretta was riding home last week. 
    She was flexing her fingers, while on the drops, and a woman in a
    minivan literally brushed her finger tips. 
    
    
    HAVE A NICE DAY! D*mn-it!
    
    				- Tim   

    
    Are you sure the author wasn't Dave Barry? ;-)
    
    Shaw

    rubber shorts?
    
    The guy's obviously off base.  No commuter clubs mammals on the way to
    work.  We club them on the way home.
    
    What an idiot.

I was wondering that too.  If the byline had been _Dave Barry_ would it have
been so offensive?  I think it's funny.

-Patrick

    I'd like to read the whole thing, the excerpts are very funny. 
    Especially the reason for riding with traffic.
    
    re .3
    
    I've learned the hard way, never pick up roadkill on the way to work
    'cause it'll spoil by dinner time.  Nothing makes my family's eyes
    light up like the sight of me coming over the hill with freshly
    squashed squirrel stuffed in my jersey pockets.  Them's good eatin'.
    
    Jamie

    Re 5:
    
         Reminds me of a joke.  What's the difference between a cyclist and
    roadkill?
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    Ans: 6 more inches to the right.
    
      cuse me!

    The guy is obviously a jerk, but at least he's a funny jerk.  If I'm
    going to get knocked off my bike and fracture my skull, I at least want
    to get a laugh out of the deal.
    
    
    		-David (who has been grazed by a flatbed)